Intimacy: Today, I sent my main man a picture of the two of us out on our...

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By Anonymous - 24/11/2009 08:54 - United States

Today, I sent my main man a picture of the two of us out on our second date. He immediately added it to his MySpace account, with the caption, "clubbin with my hoe." FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 502

You deserved it 9 641

Labour Day: Rest or Disaster?
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Same thing different taste

News to me

By Redhottt6 - 05/08/2016 01:24

Today, I received a friend request from a boyfriend I hadn't talked to in 20+ years. A few minutes later, he messaged me a picture of himself with a young woman at a strip club. My daughter. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 985

You deserved it 1 650

By Bulldogs09 - 01/07/2009 04:41 - France

Today, I finally hooked up with the boy of my dreams at a party. Later, while on AIM, I noticed one of his friend's away messages was a quote from the guy's screen name, which said, "I can't believe what I stick my dick In sometimes." FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 739

You deserved it 12 472

By anonymous - 21/11/2009 08:00 - United States

Today, I was sitting with a friend who moved back into town, and he told me about how he hooked up with a girl at a bar last night. I asked him if she was hot, he responded "Yeah, I have a picture of her on my phone." It was a picture of my girlfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 396

You deserved it 2 923

Been There

By PeppermintPenny - 10/08/2017 20:00

Today, a coworker and I had our second date at my place. He wanted to show me pictures of himself in some club, where he had been a member in highschool. He started typing his name into the google search bar and it suggested his name from when I had googled him months ago. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 720

You deserved it 1 446

Crossed Wires

By Anonymous - 01/03/2020 15:00

Today, while on Grindr, I saw that this guy I'm friends with and have liked for a while now had messaged me. I got all excited, just for it to be a picture of him flipping me off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 495

You deserved it 247

By bigmouth - 14/03/2009 08:43 - United States

Today, I met a really nice couple at a bar. We talked and the conversation eventually drifted towards online dating. I casually commented that hooking up through the internet was sad and pathetic. Turns out they met on Myspace. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 896

You deserved it 68 039

Why do people do this?

By Anonymous - 11/10/2019 04:00 - United States

Today, a friend showed me my husband's online dating profile, which includes photos of him with our kids. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 338

You deserved it 153

Creeper alert!

By creeper-status - This FML is from back in 2016 but it's good stuff - United States - Irvine

Today, I made a new friend at my college campus, which was great, until I added him on Facebook and he started liking posts from 3 years ago, asking if he could be my "dirty little secret" because he knows that I have a boyfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 574

You deserved it 1 077

By Noname - 03/02/2009 02:36 - United States

Today, I sent a guy that I like a lot a picture of myself. I'd got all dressed up sexy and did my make-up. He sent me a reply saying, "Your cat is fat." FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 648

You deserved it 6 976

Get out

By ishweta56 - 17/01/2009 22:57 - United States

Today, me and my friend are sitting here on fmylife.com while our boyfriends are out clubbing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 538

You deserved it 26 464

DarkKnyte 0

Tuesday 24 November 2009 16:31

Well, when you use the term "main man," you gotta expect to be treated like the bottom bitch. :/

jonnymohio 2

Tuesday 24 November 2009 16:33

You having a "main" man implies that you have more than one man. So he's correct in referring to you as a ho.

Comments

nicolebabyy 4

Wednesday 9 November 2011 20:03

First of all, you need to learn how to take a joke. And, who has MySpace anymore?

Bigdanish9785 3

Sunday 13 November 2011 3:28

Myspace? wtfs wrong wit u

gavvvincharlie 0

Friday 18 November 2011 21:18

Not like anyone's gonna see it

luzono 0

Friday 16 December 2011 8:51

Spell "hoe" right first off "main man" lover.

LilSideTwerk 0

Thursday 22 December 2011 21:03

hahah thats watchu get for still using MYSPACE!

DomesticAngel 14

Thursday 5 July 2012 8:39

I see you're very....promiscuous

yourwifelovesme 25

Sunday 8 July 2012 4:25

What a jackass!

TehProRussian 4

Monday 9 July 2012 20:33

I'm going to guess that the true FML here is that your boyfriend prefers gardening tools over women. Yeah that's about right.

Steel_BZ 8

Tuesday 10 July 2012 11:52

He posted a pic of the 2 of u, that's good!!

KingCeltic77 18

Thursday 2 August 2012 21:48

Don't worry nobody has a myspace anymore. You should be good.

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The Top

Today, it's been two years since my fiancé proposed, drunk, and with no ring. Recently, I overheard him on a Zoom call with a work colleague who'd not talked to him since he was with his last girlfriend, who was much more attractive than I am. The colleague asked if they were still together and he lied and said yes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 430

You deserved it 122

Today, I finished moving out of my apartment and decided to clean the fridge before I left. I pulled out a drawer that I never used and was shocked to find a moldy, rotten, decayed watermelon. I remembered that I had bought a watermelon the first week I moved into the apartment. Four years ago. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 073

You deserved it 64 867

The Top

Today, I asked my husband, of only a year, why we don't have sex anymore. He said it's because he masturbates. When I asked how often he did it, he replied "Every day that we don't have sex..." FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 156

You deserved it 9 755

Today, I got back from a service trip to Kenya, where I had no running water or electricity. I encouraged my friends to go green and help raise awareness by conserving as much electricity as possible. I return home to find that all my lights have been on for 2 weeks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 459

You deserved it 64 089

Today, I was at soccer practice. The ground's keeper just aerated the field, and my teammates and I decided to throw the cylindrical clumps of dirt at each other. I got hit in the face with one. It wasn't dirt. It was a clump of wet dog poop. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 381

You deserved it 13 555

Today, I asked out a coworker I really like. She gave me a weird look and said, "You're not gay?" I said no, to which she said, "Well, I am". As it turns out, I was the only one who thought she was straight, and the only one who thought I was straight. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 837

You deserved it 385

Today, I got mugged. For an actual mug. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 397

You deserved it 113

Today, for the first time all month I felt truly proud and accomplished. I finally figured out how to change the toilet seat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 891

You deserved it 24 114