Love: Today, I was at a swim meet. I asked my friend if he could be...

By look before you speak - 09/02/2014 07:12 - United States

Today, I was at a swim meet. I asked my friend if he could be my wingman and help me get a date with a girl I really liked. I told him my plan, and as I finished and turned to go to her, I noticed her standing right there, listening in on the whole conversation. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 623

You deserved it 13 825

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Same thing different taste

By KeepOnTruckin' - 18/05/2019 17:50

Today, I had to help my best friend plan his upcoming date with the girl he doesn't know I'm secretly in love with. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 915

You deserved it 576

Defeated

By Aaron - 09/12/2012 23:34 - United States - Matthews

Today, I decided to talk to a girl at the gym I had seen there a lot. I walked up to her at the station she was at and asked her out to dinner sometime. I didn't realize she had been wearing headphones. She took them off and asked if I was waiting on the station. My courage left. I said yes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 714

You deserved it 4 919

In the zone

By Anonymous - 12/09/2019 20:05

Today, I was flirting with a girl I like when she confessed she was into another guy. I then proceeded to wingman for that guy, telling her to take her shot with him before the chance went away. Effectively sticking myself into the friendzone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 773

You deserved it 1 682

By newmoongirl1036 - 13/07/2015 02:03 - United States - Chicago

Today, I went on a date with a guy that I really like. At the last minute he informed me a friend would be tagging along. To keep his friend from being a third-wheel, I kept up a conversation, and managed to piss my date off. He thought I would be a better match for his friend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 983

You deserved it 3 363

"Friend"

By BarCrush - 22/02/2018 19:00

Today, and for the past two months, I've been going to the bar with my friends quite regularly because I have a massive crush on the cute bartender. Being quite shy, I asked my friend if he could be my wingman so I could finally talk to her properly. He took her home. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 806

You deserved it 979

By Anonymous - 03/12/2010 21:18 - Argentina

Today, a guy I've liked for a while asked if he could talk to me during break. He'd never done that before, so I was excited and said yes. As soon as we both sat down, he asked if I'd help him get a date with my best friend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 595

You deserved it 3 297

Baywatch

By Anonymous - 02/10/2017 19:30 - United States - Stony Brook

Today, I went to the university pool. There was this cute lifeguard there, and every time I got out of the water I saw her looking at me, so I walked up to her and asked if everything was OK. She told me she thought I was going to drown. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 349

You deserved it 509

By spaghett - 29/08/2016 20:32 - United States - Brooklyn

Today, after jumping into a public swimming pool, the female lifeguard, who I have had a crush on for years whistled at me. When I got out of the water, she handed me the bathing suit I'd apparently lost. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 162

You deserved it 1 821

Denied

By uglyswimmer - 23/04/2009 01:58 - United States

Today, I was talking to a swimmer I just met. I saw a cute guy and whispered to her, "That guy is hot." She asked "Who?" I pointed at him. She turned to see him, then turned back to me and said "Ew, that's my brother." She went to him, whispered something. He turned around to see me and said, "EW." FML

I agree, your life sucks 57 649

You deserved it 7 752

By babydoll13211 - 04/09/2009 21:36 - United States

Today, I was at a friend's pool party. He lives on a lake and one of our friends wouldn't get in the water. My best friend and I decided to push him off the dock. Once we had, I turned to see my crush who had watched looked shocked, then said, "You know he can't swim right?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 318

You deserved it 66 307

mea_iloveskiing 26

Sunday 9 February 2014 16:10

Now I wonder what her reaction was.

killuhand 12

Sunday 9 February 2014 16:10

thats one way to do it i guess

Comments

weveallbeenthere 30

Sunday 9 February 2014 17:05

at least she knew that you liked her. good luck.

LumpLegacy 15

Sunday 9 February 2014 17:06

Man wingman fail. As wingman he should have been on look out. I hope it went well for ya tho

jimmy_poison 19

Sunday 9 February 2014 19:15

I was thinking the same thing #31. Worst wingman ever!

1_2_chickadoo 3

Sunday 9 February 2014 17:17

dakid87 10

Sunday 9 February 2014 17:20

Is this a suspense? I'm curious to know What happened after lol

thissexyguy96 11

Sunday 9 February 2014 17:25

So the question is are you going to go on date with her or not

arre2006 19

Sunday 9 February 2014 17:30

You dumbass

sarneeley 14

Sunday 9 February 2014 17:39

I love breastfeeding my son. He stares at my face and occasionally smiles at me during it's so sweet.

swick25 22

Sunday 9 February 2014 17:57

I think you commented on the wrong FML!!! ^

Nbc27 5

Sunday 9 February 2014 18:17

follow up needed.

AestheticSynthia 7

Sunday 9 February 2014 18:25

thats actually a good way to win a date lol

ckerane 16

Sunday 9 February 2014 18:29

your wing man must have seen her stood there, hope you got the date after all that effort

Keywords

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The Top

Today, at work, I heard a weird sound coming from the ceiling. As I looked up to see what it was, a huge splash of water hit me in the face. I called mall maintenance to let them know. They told me they already knew about the leak… from the sewage line. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 943

You deserved it 2 295

Today, I came out as lesbian and introduced my new girlfriend to my family. My mom angrily told me that I should have waited until my grandparents had died before coming out, and that I was "extremely disrespectful" for making this announcement. I honestly thought everyone would be fine with it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 094

You deserved it 1 169

The Top

Today, ever supportive of my friends, I went to a concert and tried to really get into the music. I was jumping and dancing, only to realize I was at the wrong concert. My friend's band was playing next door. I spent half an hour dancing with strangers to music I didn't even really like. FML

I agree, your life sucks 115

You deserved it 522

Today, my flight was at the other side of the airport. I ran to the gate, to find that the flight had moved to the other side of the airport. So I ran again to miss my plane by a minute. However I did get a new flight... at the other end of the airport. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 085

You deserved it 1 955

Today, I learned that the one face cleaner that actually works for me is no longer being made. I just ran out of the last of my supply last night, and I woke up to find my face completely covered in zits. FML

I agree, your life sucks 910

You deserved it 120

Today, is the anniversary of my cat's death, so I went to visit her grave in the pet cemetery. Someone had spray-painted "Your cat sucks" on her grave. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 100

You deserved it 11 459

Today, after days of looking for it, I finally found the ring my boyfriend gave to me. It was on my roommate's finger. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 667

You deserved it 2 739

Today, my father told me to stop purposely singing out of tune because it was annoying. I wasn't doing it on purpose; it's my real voice. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 472

You deserved it 6 657