Intimacy: Today, I was going down on my girlfriend when I noticed a hickey...

By tehhotness - 27/03/2009 14:13 - United States

Today, I was going down on my girlfriend when I noticed a hickey near her hip. I said, "wow, last night was crazy, I don't even remember doing that!". Without even interrupting the action, she simply said, "You didn't". FML

I agree, your life sucks 102 797

You deserved it 6 793

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Same thing different taste

Someone else

By Anonymous - 30/01/2020 20:00

I agree, your life sucks 4 193

You deserved it 383

By Anonymous - 01/07/2013 18:03 - United States - Pleasantville

Today, I saw my girlfriend for the first time in weeks. She had a hickey. FML

I agree, your life sucks 59 438

You deserved it 6 295

By W T F - 03/06/2015 07:22 - United States - Jacksonville

Today, I gave my girlfriend a hickey barely an inch from her vagina. She texted me later, saying her dad saw it and had grounded her. So yeah, I'm not sure I even want to know what the hell goes on in their house. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 157

You deserved it 3 647

By Anonymous - 29/12/2014 02:49 - United States - Wilmington

Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend. Things got heated and I yelled, "Who's your daddy?" With a blank expression she replied, "I don't know." FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 315

You deserved it 17 966

By IloveJapan - 02/04/2012 14:02 - Japan

Today, my boyfriend gave me a hickey. On my forehead. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 448

You deserved it 10 162

By tkrause - 01/04/2013 17:17 - Canada - Nelson

Today, my boyfriend came over with a hickey on his neck. He thinks "The vacuum did it" is a believable excuse. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 453

You deserved it 4 168

By allalone - 14/07/2010 00:33 - United States

Today, I put the vacuum cleaner hose against my neck to give me a hickey, so that it would look like I got some action. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 328

You deserved it 45 470

By hoovered - 04/03/2009 16:24 - United States

Today, my friends decided it would be funny to give me a "hickey" with a vacuum cleaner while I was passed out drunk. Not only do I have to try and explain this to my girlfriend, but we're meeting her parents for lunch this afternoon. FML

I agree, your life sucks 59 063

You deserved it 22 457

By Anonymous - 01/06/2013 07:51 - United States - Portland

Today, I was making love to my fiancée, when she dug her nails into my back and told me to "choke" her like I did last night. I was at work last night. FML

I agree, your life sucks 90 127

You deserved it 6 179

By Anonymous - 16/03/2012 20:23 - Ireland

Today, my boyfriend and I were getting heated, and he started to go down on me. In excitement, I accidentally drove a knee into his face. No amount of fondling his diddlestick made him forgive me for his bloody nose and swollen eye. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 771

You deserved it 13 693

songstress4life 0

Friday 27 March 2009 20:05

Wow... she didn't even kinda feel remorseful. Sorry, dude!

Shadowflames420 0

Friday 27 March 2009 20:06

she still your girlfriend? wtf is wrong with you! dump her!

Comments

FlightlessTalk 0

Wednesday 1 April 2009 3:58

break up with her sorry ass. heartless.

joeyfrogs 0

Thursday 2 April 2009 4:34

Kill her

nobody_special 0

Thursday 2 April 2009 7:40

You sure it was a hicky? Could've been a scratch or a bruise... If not, I feel bad for you

IMz0r 0

Saturday 11 April 2009 1:05

'Tis pity she's a *****

playful2088 0

Thursday 16 April 2009 4:50

lucky girl gets alot of action 'down there' lol.

mattypants 0

Tuesday 21 April 2009 21:15

#3 is right. She was honest, you can either dump her with good reason now. Otherwise you can be just another guy to her.

dizzle_doneski 0

Sunday 3 May 2009 4:57

XDD, well it's not that bad.. a girl could have given her that.. ask her

MTBowen11191993 0

Tuesday 2 June 2009 22:20

At least she was honest. It sucks and you should end it, but at least she was honest.

dutchess_ 0

Tuesday 16 June 2009 1:29

oops...! it happens...

Faced159 0

Saturday 20 June 2009 3:19

that's what you get for dating a ****!

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I agree, your life sucks 484

You deserved it 98

Today, my boyfriend came over to have dinner with my parents. They got quite drunk, and my mom shouted at him, "Have you had sex with my daughter?" As he was shaking his head, my dad said, "I have" in a really creepy voice, thinking it would be funny. It wasn't. FML

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I agree, your life sucks 19 165

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I agree, your life sucks 998

You deserved it 443

Today, I told my grandmother I was planning a trip to take my newborn son to meet his great-great-grandfather before it was too late. She had a guilty expression on her face. My great-grandfather died 4 months ago and my family forgot to tell me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 945

You deserved it 270

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I agree, your life sucks 1 997

You deserved it 162

Today, I'm in the hospital because I sliced my leg open. Why? I jumped off my bed and scratched myself on the metal bed frame when Miss America was crowned to Miss Virginia. I'm 20 years old, and a man. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 462

You deserved it 34 585

Same thing different taste

Someone else

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