Miscellaneous: Today, I went on a date, and within the first five minutes, he...

By Shawty - 03/11/2009 03:41 - United States

Today, I went on a date, and within the first five minutes, he said, "Before we go any further and get anymore serious, you need to know a few things, I have kissed a guy drunk because it was a dare, and have a $400 silk rose Victoria's Secret blanket." FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 333

You deserved it 5 842

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He's a keeper

By Anonymous - 19/12/2022 15:00

Today, I went on a first date. He got so drunk he forgot what he ordered to eat ten minutes after ordering. He also had to text me later to ask if we kissed, because he couldn’t remember. FML

I agree, your life sucks 933

You deserved it 126

By OMFG I LOVE MLP - 24/08/2012 21:00 - Germany - Mainz

Today, my friends set me up on a blind date. I thought it went well, and while saying our goodbyes, I leaned in to give her a kiss. She pulled way, laughed, "I'm not drunk enough for that," and left. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 944

You deserved it 3 794

By hannaholic - 03/07/2009 07:24 - United States

Today, I went on an excellent first date. After the 'end of the date kiss' came, "I suppose this is where I tell you that I'm married." FML

I agree, your life sucks 60 533

You deserved it 4 915

Maturity level

By Clairebear - 07/05/2024 15:00 - United States

Today, I went on a date with someone I'd met online. Everything was going surprisingly well, until I knocked over my drink, spilling it all over my date's lap. In a panic, I blurted out, "Dude, did you piss yourself?" Needless to say, there will be no second date. FML

I agree, your life sucks 110

You deserved it 784

Meanwhile, in 1953…

By nope! - 04/03/2020 12:00

Today, I had my first date in more than two years. As soon as I sat down, the first words out of his mouth were, "How many people have you had sex with? Not just recently, but ever. I don’t date women who’ve had more than 5 partners." I left before we'd even ordered drinks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 196

You deserved it 307

By kittenfish8903 - 06/10/2014 19:46 - United States

Today, while cuddling in bed with my drunk boyfriend, he kissed me softly then told me under no circumstances would he ever marry me. Then kissed me again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 348

You deserved it 4 684

By Chaznuts - 08/09/2009 06:22 - Australia

Today, I went on a blind double date. My date was drunk before I got there. He kept getting my name wrong, and ended up spilling a glass of red wine down the front of my dress. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 542

You deserved it 5 203

By bootycall:( - 15/02/2017 13:00 - United States - Oxnard

Today, I went on what I thought was my fifth date with a guy. We finally got intimate and it was amazing. As soon as it was over, he said : "Sorry babe, I should get going. I have a date tomorrow and I'd hate to be tired for it." FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 943

You deserved it 1 270

By RhiannonMuh - 09/09/2016 20:01 - Germany - Starnberg

Today, I was on a date with a guy I really like. Everything went well, and then he wanted to kiss me. As he leaned towards me, I got slightly panicky and ducked out of the way, causing him to headbutt the car behind me. Now we know why I'm still a virgin. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 413

You deserved it 3 066

Tonight, on Blind Dates…

By dateless - This FML is from back in 2012 but it's good stuff - United Kingdom - London

Today, I went on a blind date. He took one look at me and said, "Well, we might as well get a drink anyway." FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 504

You deserved it 2 438

reki_fml 0

Tuesday 3 November 2009 9:34

Today, I went on a date and to lighten the mood a little, I told her that I had kissed a guy drunk and have a $400 silk rose Victoria's Secret blanket. She clearly didn't get it, and was so horrified that she went home and posted what I said on the internet. FML

JessiGoose 0

Tuesday 3 November 2009 9:23

Haha!!! That's a winner in my eyes. I don't think this is fml, it's just funny and cute.

Comments

BeanieBGone 6

Monday 15 August 2011 19:09

What's wrong with that? I had a guy friend ask me to go linen shopping with him because "girls have the softest, most comfortable beds."

blinksmilewink 23

Saturday 17 September 2011 22:39

Seems odd that a guy would do that...

Liquatic 1

Tuesday 20 November 2012 10:24

We all do odd things. This is harmless.

dionnypony 7

Monday 3 October 2011 21:35

What is his name, i want a date with him too!!

neilsc 8

Sunday 6 November 2011 22:25

Haha win! that guy is my kinda guy: Cute, funny and willing to say anything (:

saxplayer9291 3

Friday 16 December 2011 6:08

Atleast he was honest. The kissing a guy page would be fine if it werent accompanied by the rose blanket. But still. Honesty is great

LadyGore 12

Sunday 26 February 2012 0:12

I fail to see how this is an FML, would you rather he lie about his entire life? 0.0

Playboy420 0

Wednesday 18 April 2012 15:53

Marry him

goldens_fml 12

Saturday 14 July 2012 1:02

Well, that's more than a bit awkward, he could have had better timing, but oh well.

Liquatic 1

Tuesday 20 November 2012 10:23

Yeah what's the problem? At least he's being honest with you. Stop being picky and give the guy a shot. "Omg he has a silk blanket! I have to kill myself now!" Drama queen.