I haven't seen anyone comment that she must be a hoe sleeping around with other men or saying she deserves it for getting knocked up. Some people are saying that she should have used protection but that's stupid because protection can fail and we don't know if she did use it or not. That being said, if he was an ass trying to get out of his responsibilities he wouldn't have asked for a DNA test. He's asking her to prove that it's his. There's nothing wrong with that and if it's not his baby then I'm sorry but it doesn't fall on him to support her. He wants to make sure that it IS his baby. I'm not saying she did anything wrong, but you can't look down on him for just trying to find out the truth. If you interpret it as they took a DNA test and he found out that it wasn't his baby before she did, then again, you can't blame him for not going to the ultrasound. Not bashing her, not bashing him. Simply understanding where he is coming from.

For all we know, the ex was cheated on and it hurt him.. and now he would just like a DNA test before making a big commitment. A DNA test isnt that big of a deal. So what if he missed ONE ultrasound. He just wants to make sure he is the father. It's okay to double-check.

Right on, those were exactly my thoughts. It's not always good for people to assume or make a statement without seeing the entire situation. Very well said comment. +1

Above comment in response to #87

84 No one has name called here except you. Everyone is just saying that it's vague and hard to tell the entire story from the one instance she let us in on. We're all discussing opinions, possibilities and our own experiences with related situations. Without knowing the entire situation we don't know what's really happening. There's an infinite number of true scenarios. Ranging from all the guilt and wrong behavior is on him or on her.

I named called? Would you like to read my comments more thoroughly? Because I don't recall calling anyone names. Or perhaps you don't know how to read and interpret? You just see the word "hoe" and say that I'm name calling?

Being a single mother is hard for many for many women. I suggest you don't try to tell other women it's going to be easy just because your sisters can do it.

I was a single mom of two for 2 years. You're damn right it's hard. And some people don't have support (I am an only child with deadbeat parents, and no family around) and also try their hardest to work their asses off to pay a mortgage, padrent, utilities, food, and gas and insurance. It's not as easy as you say, and frankly it bugs the hell out of me that you're that damn ignorant to say that.

#137: I agree with you completely. It is ignorant to say being a single mom is easy just because it is for a few people.

If he signs the birth certificate, and later finds out he's not the father, he may still have to pay child support. At least that's how it can work in the states. So he's right to get on that now before the child is born, if he suspects she has had multiple partners. I don't know about in Canada, but in the states the courts rule overwhelmingly in favor of women.

In Canada, even if you sign the birth certificate you can get out of paying child support if you can prove you are not, and also, you have up to one month or two (cannot remember as its been a while) to fill out the birth certificate and mail it off, after the baby is born, so by then you should already have the results back.

I think that's pretty bad reasoning. If I had any doubts that the child was mine, I wouldn't get involved until I found out for sure. No sense in starting to love a child only to find out it's not yours.

That's your opinion and this is mine. If I were in her position, I would hope the 'assumed' father would like to be there just for the small chance the baby was his. That's why I say, its not that much time taken out to just be there, because in the future, if he finds out it is his, he may feel like a load of shit for missing out.

Maybe he's protecting himself? Believing a baby to be yours and going through 9 months of preparing to be a father and the love and connection he's going to feel, especially if he goes to scans, hears the heartbeat, feels baby kick and sees it moving around on the ultrasound screen, then finding out after the birth it isn't yours? That can be one hell of a deeply traumatic experience, just like miscarriage, still birth or death of a child. He may have genuine reason to doubt the paternity, and wanting the test before he commits his emotions doesn't make him a bad person.

It doesn't make him a bad person. Just because you go to the doctors appointments and being there for the ultrasounds and what not, isn't necessarily going to make you fall in love with the unborn child, you're just experiencing something amazing. I only say this because with my first pregnancy, it never really hit me until after the baby was born and then I realized that that was my son and I fell in love. The experience beforehand was really cool though and I loved seeing the ultrasound. It would be a shame if he were to miss those if it actually is his baby.

106 My friend did all the expectant dad stuff with his ex. He's devastated that the baby isn't his. It's honestly broken his heart that he put so much time and efforts into loving and caring for a baby that turned out not to be his. In his mind he just lost his daughter to some else. That's about as hard as it gets.

I understand that 169 but all I was saying was he should be there for the doctor appointments and ultrasounds to be a part of that and then as soon as the baby is born, do the paternity test. That way he isn't spending all the time caring for a baby per say, just being there during the growth before it is born. Also my condolences to your friend, I am very sorry that happened to him, I can only imagine being that hurt.