Animals: Today, I yelled at my boyfriend's cat for staring at me, then... - FML

By alii2349 - 11/02/2014 03:16 - Canada - Brandon

Today, I yelled at my boyfriend's cat for staring at me, then cried about it for an hour. Pregnancy life. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 463

You deserved it 10 043

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 17/01/2016 08:19 - United States - San Francisco

Today, my pregnancy hormones were so bad, I broke down crying because my cat sat on my husband's lap instead of mine. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 978

You deserved it 2 851

By insert pussy pun, hurr durr - 29/06/2016 17:34 - United States - Hopkinsville

Today, my boyfriend got irrationally pissed at me because his cat decided to sit on my lap instead of his. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 314

You deserved it 1 153

By Anonymous - 22/11/2014 15:34 - United States - Waterville

Today, I had to babysit both my neighbor's 3-year-old daughter and my very pregnant cat. I left the room briefly, only to come back to a traumatized 3-year-old crying in horror as my cat gave birth in front of her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 563

You deserved it 4 512

HUMAN! I NEED ATTENTION!

By Mur - 09/09/2023 22:00

Today, my girlfriend called me four times in a row at work. Worried, I stepped outside and answered the phone. Through tears, she screamed, "It's the cat!" Was he sick or hurt? "NO! He won't stop meowing!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 647

You deserved it 132

By wekasdjkasldasdkasdzcawqe - 07/08/2013 20:55 - Sweden

Today, my mother yelled and yelled at me until I apologized to our cat for not petting him when he sat on my lap. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 082

You deserved it 5 692

Welcome to the family!

By Sprtsgeek13 - 13/09/2012 12:37 - United States - Camden

Today, I had my girlfriend over to meet my parents. After dinner, we were in the living room talking. My dad thought it would be funny to grab our cat, stick it down his shirt, then pretend to give birth to it, with sound effects. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 441

You deserved it 2 534

By Wtf is wrong with her - 30/12/2012 05:20 - Canada - Toronto

Today, I had to watch my drunk girlfriend yell at a cat for not having periods. The worst part is that she was at a pet store. The pet store at which I work. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 913

You deserved it 3 758

By Anonymous - 03/10/2012 16:29 - United States - Santee

Today, I woke up in the middle of the night to my cat meowing, with her dilated vagina in my face, giving birth to her first litter of kittens. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 984

You deserved it 5 416

By Anonymous - 18/08/2015 22:55 - United States - Salt Lake City

Today, I am two months pregnant. Being super hormonal, I was crying about how much I was crying. My husband put his arms around me to comfort me, and I sobbed so hard that I threw up all over him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 376

You deserved it 3 129

Mistaken identity

By Anonymous - 14/06/2021 22:01

Today, I got home to some mad woman in my yard screaming about pregnancy and rape, and I almost had a heart attack thinking my son was being accused of some terrible crime. Turns out she was accusing my 15-year-old tomcat of impregnating her prize winning white fluff-ball of a cat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 555

You deserved it 127

Next

Top comments

184886837272837 32

Tuesday 11 February 2014 13:24

Don't worry, I'm sure the cat didn't take it to personally.

SgtAssCheeks 21

Tuesday 11 February 2014 13:27

Atleast it wasn't wheezing and plotting to kill you. Oh wait, cats do always plot to kill you.

Comments

Esther_Hong 6

Tuesday 11 February 2014 19:23

Lmfao

awilliams44 9

Tuesday 11 February 2014 19:24

I wonder what the cat was thinking

worldclassrager 39

Tuesday 11 February 2014 19:48

Did it a occur the cat wanted a little scratch on the head or back? Well my cat does that...

FlyingPie 17

Tuesday 11 February 2014 21:09

Are you kitten me?

icepick23 12

Tuesday 11 February 2014 21:25

Cats are devious; might want to watch your back. May the force be with you!

gabagabaheyu 10

Tuesday 11 February 2014 21:41

i'm sure the cat could care less.

Witchylady 17

Wednesday 12 February 2014 0:05

Blame it on the baby!!! Or maybe you have anger issues. Either way I hope you have a safe pregnancy. Congrats!!!!!

it__happens 17

Wednesday 12 February 2014 4:26

Get your self together man!

JKPwnage 27

Wednesday 12 February 2014 4:56

So they ARE conscious of their hormonal freakouts...

KacyA93 7

Wednesday 12 February 2014 8:15

Yup. It doesn't lessen up after birth like you'd think. When I got home from the hospital I cried for an hour when I couldn't find a bra. Lol. It sucked.

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The Top

Today, someone burgled my hotel room. As always, I had locked my passport, extra cash, and other valuables in the closet safe, so I thought the losses would be superficial. What a discovery that the safe hadn't been fastened to the closet shelf, so the thief just picked it up and took it home. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 115

You deserved it 3 104

Today, my company told me that they refuse to buy me new safety footwear without a doctor's note, because my shoe size is three sizes smaller than the minimum size my company provides. I actually have to get my doctor to prove my shoe size. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 527

You deserved it 1 300

The Top

Today, I was mugged by a street preacher. The same one who'd earlier in the day screamed at me for being an evil sinner. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 696

You deserved it 3 822

Today, I was at a restaurant with my boyfriend. I look him straight in the eye and ask him: "What's the first thing you think about when you look at me?". His answer: "Can I finish my steak?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 331

You deserved it 8 636

Today, at a family dinner, my mother-in-law talked me into showing off some moves that I've learned in martial arts. I gently did a restraining hold on her. She screamed that I was trying to break her wrists, and kept the wounded act up all night, smirking as everyone gave me death glares. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 584

You deserved it 5 227

Today, the first guy I tried to have sex with at university got his foreskin stuck in his zip and had to go to hospital for stitches. He told all his friends I did it on purpose with my teeth during a blowjob. I now have a reputation, so I guess I'm staying single for the next 3 years. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 218

You deserved it 727

Today, I'm moving out of the house. My little sister can't wait and I've never seen my dad so happy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 917

You deserved it 4 683

Today, I was under the impression that my kids would eventually grow out of wanting to watch me use the bathroom. Instead, my 7 year-old son attempted to pick the lock so he could watch me take a shit and make fun of me for it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 804

You deserved it 285