Love: Today, my boyfriend handcuffed me to the bed, naked. Someone... - FML

By hahahehehohohoo - 07/02/2009 03:55 - United States

Spicy

Today, my boyfriend handcuffed me to the bed, naked. Someone pulled the fire alarm, and my boyfriend couldn't find the key. So he left me, and the Resident Advisor found me. The fireman had to cut the chain. FML

I agree, your life sucks 324 365

You deserved it 58 652

Thanksgiving: Turkeys and Skids
Family meals that turn absurd, because Thanksgiving is also about laughing at little disasters. More…

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 05/05/2012 12:07 - Israel - Ramat Hasharon

Spicy

Today, my boyfriend cuffed my legs to the bed. After the sex we discovered one of the cuffs wouldn't open. After an hour of trying to pry them open, I had to waddle with him to the fire station to have them removed in front of 4 amused firefighters. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 165

You deserved it 8 757

By Anonymous - 15/04/2016 19:46 - United States - Bronx

Spicy

Today, I got locked in my boyfriend's garage in my underwear while his parents ripped him a new one for having sex beneath their roof. His sister had to let me out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 560

You deserved it 5 052

Wakey wakey

By DanJames24 - 24/05/2021 05:01 - United Kingdom - Southsea

Today, my flatmate woke me up early, saying there was a fire and we had to evacuate. Barely awake, she practically dragged me downstairs and got to the front door. Once we got there, she opened the front door, kneed me in the nuts, and pushed me out, locking it behind her. I was only in boxers. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 110

You deserved it 161

By wookieewhosshe - 19/03/2019 13:00 - United Kingdom - Sutton Coldfield

Today, my building's fire alarm went off. Unfortunately, this coincided with sexy time, and the loud alarm made me jumpy, making it extremely difficult to untie my naked boyfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 125

You deserved it 396

Sneaky

By TasedAndDazed - This FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I snuck into my boyfriend's house because I knew his parents wouldn't be there. Later, I woke up in a hospital bed because his sister thought I was a burglar and tased me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 619

You deserved it 43 663

By avocadotoe - 14/11/2016 06:52 - United States - Big Bear Lake

Today, my boyfriend and I were house sitting. We were a little on edge because we'd heard noises. We were starting to get intimate, and suddenly the house alarm started going off. We locked ourselves in the room, called the police, and they told us that we were the ones who'd set it off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 203

You deserved it 3 113

By Ignorant - 07/10/2017 06:00

Spicy

Today, my husband and I had a HUGE fight, but we had amazing make up sex so I figured it was over. When I woke up, I realized my mistake. I was tied to the four bed posts completely naked and a sign was taped on the ceiling. "Repairman coming in an hour. Gave him a key. Have all your clothes. Have fun." FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 998

You deserved it 896

By Anonymous - 07/09/2009 21:20 - United States

Spicy

Today, I ran into my parents bedroom after I heard my name and what sounded like painful screams. When I opened the door my parents were on top of each other laughing hysterically. They needed me to find the key to the handcuffs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 61 206

You deserved it 3 465

Why would you do that?

By Sam - 23/11/2009 01:35 - United States

Spicy

Today, I was at my boyfriend's house. We were starting to get intimate, and I thought it would be kinky to tie his hands to his bed so he'd be more turned on. Suddenly his mom called us for dinner, but I couldn't untie him fast enough. I had to sit there, embarrassed, while his mom undid the rope. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 112

You deserved it 29 795

Some people just don't like surprises

By alone and horny - 20/06/2020 20:01

Today, I went outside to smoke a cigarette. When I started to head back in, I saw a shadow move across my bedroom window. I live alone, so I waited outside and called the police. They came and investigated, only to drag my naked boyfriend out, where he promptly dumped me. I forgot our 2-year anniversary. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 831

You deserved it 1 727

Next

Top comments

xXxRandiexXx 0

Saturday 7 February 2009 13:32

I would dump him. he just left you there!!!

Pewsily 0

Saturday 7 February 2009 14:19

Hahaha, this made my day!

Comments

Javee 17

Tuesday 26 June 2012 23:03

Oh, what an asshole. Kick his ass so hard he wishes he never did that.

bstudds 1

Thursday 5 July 2012 19:44

I was an RA in college and thankfully I never ran into any situations like this because I would have just laughed at the poor girl. I mean I would have helped her eventually, but laughed first.

palkemon 1

Thursday 19 July 2012 13:29

Wow that sucks

Griffin10 5

Tuesday 24 July 2012 21:42

What a dick he couldn't even help put ur clothes on first!!!!!

qbCasey 11

Tuesday 30 October 2012 11:29

I wish I had been the fireman

Lizzy_Chan 5

Tuesday 2 April 2013 4:14

And you let him handcuff you? Hon, that's a problem.

Baltonuts 0

Tuesday 30 July 2013 23:13

"Hon"? U must be from my neck of the woods.

russiandre 4

Sunday 26 May 2013 16:54

I am usually good at controlling myself but this story turned me on... FML

wow_thats_bad 6

Sunday 26 May 2013 19:09

Looks like you need to find a new boyfriend, honey.

Yusomadbro_fml 4

Thursday 27 June 2013 1:06

R u sure u no rape d

pinguino3669_fml 23

Monday 1 July 2013 4:51

"It's gettin hot in here" haha :P well OP hopefully you decide to get more personal where there's less chance of hazards like that!

taaywall 13

Saturday 22 August 2015 5:09

like where? hahah

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I agree, your life sucks 39 423

You deserved it 3 713

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I agree, your life sucks 6 768

You deserved it 2 628

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I agree, your life sucks 13 504

You deserved it 1 986

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I agree, your life sucks 67 606

You deserved it 3 696

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I agree, your life sucks 25 088

You deserved it 2 876

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I agree, your life sucks 24 170

You deserved it 1 654