Work: Today, my colleague and I played yet another wonderful game of...

By whydoidothis - 03/10/2014 11:29 - United Kingdom

Today, my colleague and I played yet another wonderful game of 'Tapeworm or Toilet Paper?' in the homeless shelter's toilets we were asked to clean. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 544

You deserved it 3 988

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Same thing different taste

By lifesucks0925 - 06/09/2013 07:01 - United States - Vallejo

Today, I had to clean human excrement at work when the fitting room turned into the shitting room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 785

You deserved it 2 816

By minimum wage - 02/04/2012 08:38 - Canada

Today, I walked in on a homeless guy peeing on a turd on the floor of the women's restroom at the park. I'm a janitor for the city. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 340

You deserved it 2 404

True hero

By MentalHealthWorker - 17/09/2020 02:05

Today, I once again had to clean up a shower and bathroom covered in feces, because of client with incontinence. It smelt so bad that I couldn’t hide my reaction; the client saw my face and I could see the embarrassment on theirs. I spent the rest of the day feeling like an asshole. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 559

You deserved it 241

By cj1012 - 08/07/2012 03:16 - United States

Today, a homeless man started to wet himself in the recliner at the coffee shop where I work. He then walked all the way to the bathroom, only to finish urinating in a puddle right in front of the bathroom door. Guess who cleaned it up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 408

You deserved it 1 870

By KP - 25/06/2009 16:22 - United States

Today, while I was working a customer notified me that the men's restroom need some attention. Thinking that there was just a small mess, I walked into the restroom only to discover someone had taken a crap in the sink. Guess who got to clean it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 124

You deserved it 3 096

By Former Professor - 21/07/2019 22:00

Today, I happily went to an interview after job searching for months. I learned a large part of my job would be cleaning the toilets. Every. Single. Hour. I used to lecture at a university until budget cuts happened. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 122

You deserved it 206

Classy

By Anonymous - 22/10/2019 22:00 - France

Today, I've got two family members over to stay. So far, I have found a dirty Q-Tip, a nasty toe nail and had to clean up period blood from toilets, bin, and the floor. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 728

You deserved it 155

By Cultus - 05/06/2018 19:00

Today, I went into the tanning room at work, where the lady in there last had decided the trash can was a toilet and pooped in it. Before she sat, she took the time to wrap the edges in paper towels, I guess in case anyone else had done this before her. I had to clean it up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 696

You deserved it 192

Cooperation

By Anonymous - 24/01/2021 02:02 - Germany - Emden

Today, I share a bathroom with two other people and we divide tasks equally. They take care of making it dirty; I take care of making it clean. FML

I agree, your life sucks 793

You deserved it 130

By shewhopoopsinlitterboxes - 25/07/2014 15:54 - United States - Downingtown

Today, there are people working in my bathroom. I have the shits. The only place I could think to go was in my cats litter box. I've used it twice and am now contemplating using it a third time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 975

You deserved it 7 660

fleur_de_fevrier_fml 22

Friday 3 October 2014 15:50

I'd feel worse for the poor people who have to use these toilets...

PipingMouse 14

Friday 3 October 2014 16:08

Make sure you don't touch the toilet seats with any of your body parts because then you'll be playing 'Herpes or Cold Sore?'

Comments

Mattaguirre_ 15

Friday 3 October 2014 15:44

that's not nice

Jreslier 15

Friday 3 October 2014 15:58

That's a shit job.

PipingMouse 14

Friday 3 October 2014 16:25

It's nice that the homeless people have clean toilet seats :) +1 towards my faith in humanity

addictedtoIASIP 14

Friday 3 October 2014 18:01

It's true, you wouldn't like it either if it were your job

Nilorak 24

Friday 3 October 2014 15:46

Can I join?

Sakuraashita 15

Friday 3 October 2014 15:46

That's naaasty!

tony1891 22

Friday 3 October 2014 15:49

thats a shitty job

Nilorak 24

Friday 3 October 2014 15:50

No shit.

EverestMelting 23

Friday 3 October 2014 16:25

I appreciated that shitty comment, #5.

WolfyGrace 24

Saturday 4 October 2014 9:24

I'm sure there was lots of shit, #5.

fleur_de_fevrier_fml 22

Friday 3 October 2014 15:50

I'd feel worse for the poor people who have to use these toilets...

201chasew 22

Friday 3 October 2014 19:11

I would be scarred for life if I shit out a tapeworm

eaglerob 20

Friday 3 October 2014 15:50

Bank all that karma, you're awesomesauce

dawood_k 27

Friday 3 October 2014 15:55

So what was it... Tapeworm or paper

devildog562 33

Friday 3 October 2014 15:56

With the tape worm you get a nice new body and get to eat whatever you want, And possibly have them spread up to your brain!

ohSNAPyall 26

Saturday 4 October 2014 5:59

But are there any drawbacks?

devildog562 33

Saturday 4 October 2014 9:28

Negative, weight loss and a three foot worm seems okay to me !

candyolympics 17

Sunday 5 October 2014 6:04

#48, More like a 50 foot worm that can live up to 20 years in your intestines.

thebigtwinkie 28

Friday 3 October 2014 16:07

may the shit puns beging

PipingMouse 14

Friday 3 October 2014 16:08

Make sure you don't touch the toilet seats with any of your body parts because then you'll be playing 'Herpes or Cold Sore?'

WCARlover 34

Friday 3 October 2014 16:13

There is so much wrong with this. Cold sores are heroes, and they aren't spread by toilet seats

PipingMouse 14

Friday 3 October 2014 16:14

I know that...I did go to health class in high school.

WCARlover 34

Friday 3 October 2014 16:15

Okay, your comment would suggest otherwise

PipingMouse 14

Friday 3 October 2014 16:18

Okay, sorry, how about this brainiac? 'Gonnorrhea or Syphilis?' I didn't know that FML comments were so "serious"....

thejimler 9

Friday 3 October 2014 17:04

#14 they're heroes? I must have missed the pilot episode of the failed cartoon for "Captain Coldsore!"

thesmeagol 22

Friday 3 October 2014 23:30

thats unfortunate for you 28. Twas an amazing episode.

Keywords

Neighbours Miscellaneous Awkward Wanker Halloween Lonely Love Party Jealousy Family Argument Fight Cats Animals Parents Health Embarrassing Sports Shopping Medication Birds Anger issues Weddings Pranks YouTube TikTok Cute Dogs AITA Work

The Top

Today, I had sex with a guy I've liked for ages. We were lying in his bed afterwards, and he mumbled the word "happy". I thought it was really sweet, until he repeated himself. "My girlfriend probably won't be too happy about this." FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 575

You deserved it 6 914

Today, my dad asked me to send my mom a text since he was driving and I was in the passenger seat. I pulled up my mom's contact on his phone, and I found that my mom had recently sent my dad a picture of her jugs, along with the message, "We miss you." FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 860

You deserved it 2 751

The Top

Today, I got a lovely little surprise after I got out of the shower. That lovely little surprise? I got stung in the scrotum by a hornet that had decided to nestle itself inside the towel I was drying off with. FML

I agree, your life sucks 58 053

You deserved it 3 269

Today, my boyfriend of seven years dumped me because he said my cheeks getting way too fat for his taste and he didn't want to be with a chipmunk. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 684

You deserved it 7 674

Today, I tore my ACL while doing physical therapy that's supposed to keep me from tearing my ACL. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 995

You deserved it 2 647

Today, my idiot husband got drunk in the middle of the day and decided to dress our 7-year-old like Rufio from the movie Hook. I wouldn’t have even been mad if he’d done a decent job. Instead, he did a botched bleach and dye job in our boy’s hair that makes him look like a skunk on acid. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 471

You deserved it 273

Today, we overheard a customer in our store talking on the phone about how she'd been exposed to someone positive for COVID-19, and was supposed to be at home in quarantine just in case. The terrifying thing is how many other people come into our store when they shouldn't. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 160

You deserved it 138

Today, while working my shift at Taco Bell, a creepy guy started flirting with me. He said, "You remind me of something," acting as if I knew him from elsewhere. I quickly said I used to work at Chili's. He shook his head and said, "No, not a person! An animal. A sloth maybe." FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 857

You deserved it 4 205

Same thing different taste

True hero

Classy

Cooperation

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