Money: Today, my dad confessed that the only reason I'm alive today...

By Savannah - 01/08/2011 21:20 - United States

Today, my dad confessed that the only reason I'm alive today is because he couldn't afford to pay for an abortion. He couldn't afford it because he'd splashed out on brand new furniture at IKEA shortly before discovering my mom was pregnant. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 073

You deserved it 2 955

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 17/01/2016 07:26 - United States - Blair

Today, I found out that the only reason I'm alive is because my dad beat the living shit out of my mom to stop her getting an abortion. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 291

You deserved it 1 895

By Anonymous - 21/03/2014 22:35 - Australia

Today, my dad took me to a bar for my first legal drink. He quickly got "drunk" and started slurring that I was an accident, saying the only reason I'm alive is because he'd been too poor to pay for an abortion. As I started crying, he burst out laughing and said soberly, "Just kidding, son." FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 895

You deserved it 6 751

By psychic parents, how do they work? :( - 31/07/2013 22:49 - United States - Effingham

Today, I went to my dad, hoping to confess something to him. He quickly said that if I'd got my girlfriend pregnant, he'd kill me. That's exactly what happened. I had to make up a lie instead about stealing $50 from his wallet once as a kid, which he then demanded I pay back in full. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 700

You deserved it 47 503

By crakbbyaparently - 31/01/2009 01:34 - United States

Today, my old man told me that he only married my mom because she convinced him she was pregnant with his child. In fact, she aborted a week later. "And then we had you instead." FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 839

You deserved it 1 891

By unfortunate - 30/06/2013 04:45 - United States

Today, my father informed me that I was born only because my mom lied about being on birth control. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 150

You deserved it 3 195

By Username - 23/06/2011 08:17 - United States

Today, I found out that my dad has been trying to take money out of my savings account to pay for divorce fees and a hammock. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 368

You deserved it 2 603

Thanks for sharing your inspiring story, Dad

By Anonymous - 16/02/2024 23:00

Today, my dad told me quite bluntly that, while he loved me, he never planned to have me. My mom baby-trapped him by sabotaging their birth control methods, and my existence ruined his life irrevocably and caused the functional alcoholism he has suffered with for 40 years. FML

I agree, your life sucks 683

You deserved it 112

By ThisGuy775 - 19/09/2011 04:41 - United States

Today, my dad asked to borrow some money off me, so I said okay. Later on, he told me he'll be using it to help divorce my mom. I pretty much just helped pay for my parents' divorce. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 469

You deserved it 2 990

By Anonymous - 15/09/2011 04:42 - United States

Today, my husband told me the only reason we're still together is because he can't afford to move out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 116

You deserved it 3 196

By my honest father - 10/07/2013 16:33 - United States - Kansas City

Today, while having a serious talk with my father, he said, "Son, you're only alive because of a faulty, off-brand condom." FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 063

You deserved it 3 748

gideeupp 9

Tuesday 2 August 2011 1:04

That furniture saved your life. Haha

RabidBunny 10

Tuesday 2 August 2011 1:15

From this day forward, you will buy all of your furniture from IKEA in gratitude that you live to fight another day! Secondly, don't feel bad. Trust me when I say, if my parents had the chance to give me back they would, but thats not important. What is important, is that you can make something of yourself and make your father regret ever thinking about paying for that abortion.

Comments

em1nem13 0

Tuesday 2 August 2011 7:18

You owe your life to Sweden

motoxgrlm 3

Tuesday 2 August 2011 7:29

wow.. ur dad is an asshole.. sorry

Mekeritrig 15

Tuesday 2 August 2011 7:50

IKEA, ruining lives.

ifailplzinsultme 0

Tuesday 2 August 2011 7:58

Normally, I'd be a moronic twat and leave a dead baby joke as a comment. But since it's boners, I won't. Oh, and how many babies does it take to paint a wall?

Squit_fml 16

Tuesday 2 August 2011 8:01

On the other hand... you're lucky to exist. * whistles "always look at the bright side of life" *

JovwN212 0

Tuesday 2 August 2011 8:04

I think you should thank IKEA. And ur dads an asshole for even telling you that ha

Omni7 11

Tuesday 2 August 2011 8:11

Fyl id play a gaint prank and con him out of all of his money give half of it to ur mom and send him gay stalker letters from random location

BrimfullOfAsher 20

Tuesday 2 August 2011 8:17

Wait for the day that you can tell your father that you would pay for his bypass surgery, but you can't afford it because you just bought a new couch.