Work: Today, the extremely uncooperative client whom I'm trying to...

By harrington61 - 19/05/2013 21:27 - United States - Midland

Today, the extremely uncooperative client whom I'm trying to defend in court sent me a letter in which he threatened to sue me, because charging him for my services supposedly violates his "constipational rights". FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 305

You deserved it 3 920

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 02/12/2009 21:14 - United States

Today, my lawyer threatened to sue me because I can't afford his bill, which he sent to me after getting me out of a lawsuit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 200

You deserved it 37 046

By A Henderson - 25/04/2012 20:50 - United States

Today, I had to explain to a potential client that I wouldn't represent him, because suing his neighbor for calling him a pansy would get us laughed out of court and likely get me disbarred. His response was to get violent and threaten to sue me for violating his civil rights. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 192

You deserved it 2 254

By Anonymous - 17/03/2016 15:34 - United States - Pomona

Today, in court, my client ran his mouth at the judge, cursing him out and then trying to lecture him on "freedom of speech" when he was found in contempt. I don't know what it is with these nutjobs, but I wish I'd never become a public defender. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 203

You deserved it 2 575

By swee t - 21/09/2016 19:02 - United States - Greensboro

Today, I got a bill from my former attorney for the call he made to me begging me not to turn him in for stealing all my money and almost causing me lose my home. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 598

You deserved it 1 056

Pipe down, Pam

By goshoveafuckingfrappuccinoupyourvagyoupsychocunt - 07/09/2013 21:43 - United States - Midlothian

Today, a customer kept harassing me and threatening to sue me for all I'm worth because I wouldn't give her a free refill. Her reasoning was that it's "illegal" to deny people a free refill if there's still a little drink left in the cup. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 210

You deserved it 3 894

Fight!

By Anonymous - 28/03/2021 08:01

Today, I got a call from the county’s courthouse where I used to live saying I was being sued for fraud and expected in court to defend myself. Apparently, my ex took a loan out in my name and now I get to pay $2300 worth of legal fees and restitution to this loan company. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 118

You deserved it 91

Better call Saul

By possibly a sweater - 05/12/2013 22:26 - United States - Wharton

Today, I received a poorly-written letter from my asshole neighbor in which he threatened to "sew" me because my dog shat on his lawn again. I went over, asked if he needed some wool for his sewing, and told him to stop being an idiot. Now he's apparently hiring a lawyer for real. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 567

You deserved it 24 513

By Anonymous - 24/11/2010 19:34 - United States

Today, my boss sent me to a meeting with a client I've never met to do some damage control and renegotiate his contract. For two hours, he alternated between threatening to sue us, and making vulgar comments about raping me in his office. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 168

You deserved it 3 185

By thegrandchawhee - 29/08/2015 17:13 - United States - Yakima

Today, I was scheduled to fill in at the customer service counter where I work. Today was also the day that I allegedly accused a customer of being a thief, sold her a fraudulent money order, and will be sued for defamation of character. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 046

You deserved it 1 813

By zl5 - 04/07/2014 23:17 - New Zealand - Masterton

Today, the deranged idiot that I am defending in court went completely nuts and told the judge that I am the guy who planned the whole armed robbery that he is on trial for. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 124

You deserved it 4 843

revan546 24

Monday 20 May 2013 0:37

'Murica

Wizardo 33

Monday 20 May 2013 0:38

The only thing constipated here is his bloody brain, drop him and the case.

Comments

darkfireflame 15

Friday 13 September 2013 13:59

You should try to convince him to have you represent him in that case XD

Hollymae130 0

Thursday 10 October 2013 2:56

'MERICA

vandeele 8

Tuesday 5 November 2013 22:18

I am losing faith in humanity more and more as we speak...

madeline9322 17

Tuesday 16 September 2014 15:44

Constipational rights.

brandX 10

Sunday 12 April 2015 7:51

what a shitty thing to do. har har. ;)

Tattoo_Freak 15

Thursday 5 November 2015 14:20

Toilet Humor ftw! I cannot stop laughing. Thanks for making my day :-)

arkum89 9

Monday 29 August 2016 23:52

Shit happens

EnJey0 19

Thursday 1 September 2016 22:39

How did someone that stupid even afford a lawyer?

IHaveThePower 16

Friday 24 December 2021 0:10

Well, I always suppose you can point out that violating his constipational rights has very little to do with money rendered for services, and offer a package of sugar-free Hasbro gummy bears in compensation and goodwill.