Miscellaneous: Today, while a very cute girl was explaining the apartment's...

By NewTenant - 20/06/2011 07:37 - United States

Today, while a very cute girl was explaining the apartment's laundry machines to me, I blurted out, "It's okay, my pants are used to handling huge loads". FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 205

You deserved it 39 990

Winter: Snow and Funny News
Snuggle up and laugh with our winter stories, where snow isn't the only thing sliding around! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

Skids

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2014 but it's good stuff

Today, I walked into my house with a couple of friends and I saw my girlfriend doing laundry. I jokingly asked her if she had time to do a load of mine as well. She scoffed and said, "Yeah babe, I'll gladly do your laundry… The same day you learn to wipe properly." FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 770

You deserved it 55 316

By anonymous - 17/05/2016 00:29 - United States - Ashland

Today, at the laundromat. I loaded a huge load into the top dryer, put all the quarters in, and started the bottom one. I realized my mistake when I came to check on it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 167

You deserved it 3 829

By gtfb1993 - 02/12/2011 22:21 - Canada

Today, I was at the laundromat, when an attractive girl set up at the machine next to mine. She looked me up and down, then noticed the skid-marks on my underwear. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 688

You deserved it 42 486

By esv - 01/04/2009 09:18 - United States

Today, I went to the laundromat for the first time. I fit all of my clothes into two washers. Not knowing where to put the soap in, I asked a man doing his laundry, "Excuse me, where do I put the soap in?". He replied, "Ma'am, those are the dryers." FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 596

You deserved it 80 146

Smooth move

By nicole - 27/05/2011 20:52 - United States

Today, I saw a hot guy at the laundromat. Wanting an excuse to talk to him, I tossed a pair of my red underwear into his washer. What I didn't realize was that he was washing his whites. Thanks to me, he now has an entire load of pink shirts and boxers. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 348

You deserved it 78 696

Get the message

By thelandofoz - 14/10/2009 14:36 - United States

Today, I noticed that my clothes had shrunk. My mother seemed to be having trouble with the new washer and dryer so I tried to show her exactly how they work. After my explanation she said, "I know how they work. I shrank your clothes to give you some incentive to lose all that belly you got." FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 894

You deserved it 7 672

By BonGoWash - 07/02/2013 14:45 - United States - Bronxville

Today, I went to do my laundry. Having no laundry bag, I put clothes in a suitcase and headed to the basement. When my roommate saw me, she burst into tears with happiness. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 953

You deserved it 5 711

By smokin - 26/07/2011 21:22 - United States

Today, someone had the unique opportunity to be able to say to me, "Excuse me, your pants are on fire." FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 097

You deserved it 5 381

By beep_guacamole - 24/05/2009 21:49 - United States

Today, I went to the laundromat. I put a load in the dryer and walked away to check on my other load. When I came back, I saw a homeless man putting his dirty, wet underwear in the dryer with my clean clothes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 56 337

You deserved it 4 627

By Pickle - 06/07/2010 05:14 - United States

Today, I finally got around to doing laundry. The washing machines in my condominium building take about an hour to do a load. When I returned to throw my clothes in a dryer, I realized they were never washed in the first place. I used my card and detergent to pay for another person's laundry. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 005

You deserved it 32 120

mcxhunni 0

Monday 20 June 2011 15:49

maybe she thought you might have been referring to your dick... not dumping on yourself...

mxpklx 12

Monday 20 June 2011 15:55

someones socially awkward.

Comments

Cheylea 10

Monday 20 June 2011 16:03

Honest mistake haha, I'm sure she didn't take it too harshly.

nubx 0

Monday 20 June 2011 16:03

Your dick or ass?

JPEG7 12

Monday 20 June 2011 16:05

i dont see whats wrong with that. i found that very attractive!! lol. maybe she thought you were being silly? but probably not.

TylerSmith16 0

Tuesday 21 June 2011 8:24

your hott lol

freelife571 4

Monday 20 June 2011 16:07

Did she try to handle your load?

angelsfly 0

Monday 20 June 2011 16:13

lol :)

gene818 13

Monday 20 June 2011 16:16

It's alright man, I'm the same way. I got a PHD too. lol

RedPillSucks 31

Monday 20 June 2011 16:21

Pretty Huge Dick? Pretty Huge Dookie?

Quest_ 13

Monday 20 June 2011 16:23

Poo-heavy diaper.

Person1233 12

Monday 20 June 2011 16:25

Puny Hollow Dick.

briidontgive_ 0

Monday 20 June 2011 17:08

lmaoo pretty huge dookie

sheethapins 13

Monday 20 June 2011 20:11

Pretty hilarious doodle?

rhodesia8982 0

Monday 20 June 2011 16:18

datz pretty funnie lol

MrXerxes5 6

Monday 20 June 2011 16:23

She might've been impressed by it and not grosses out. What if you'd claimed a small load?

DawnMarie11 0

Monday 20 June 2011 16:32

next time run what you want to say through your mind as if you are actually saying it if it sounds retarded DON'T say it!

MrXerxes5 6

Monday 20 June 2011 16:37

37 - even if he had rehearsed it in his head, because he was nervous, it probably would've come out wrong anyway...

Keywords

My ex Love Awkward Jealousy AITA Friends Poopoo peepee Health Embarrassing Sports Proposal Snow Cold weather Annoying Cheating Work Relatable Money Parenting Kids DIY Accident Parents Medication ADHD Weather Miscellaneous Relationship advice Am I overreacting? Weird

The Top

Today, I went to work 8:30 am. Human stayed home. Got home at 5pm. Human is working on his music at home. It is 7:11 pm and Human is still on his computer working on the same song, on replay. FML

I agree, your life sucks 87

You deserved it 282

Today, there was a long queue at the store, and behind me were two senior citizens. I wanted to do a good deed, so I said, "Cut before me in line, I have all the time in the world." My reward? The old man scolded me because I supposedly insinuated that they were old, and only had a short time left to live. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 423

You deserved it 13 444

The Top

Today, I was at my girlfriend's house. I really had to use the bathroom, but decided to wait. After about an hour, I went to the restroom. I pissed for so long that when I walked out her family all started clapping. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 505

You deserved it 6 589

Today, I came down with food poisoning of some sort. After hours of scrambling to the toilet to vomit and empty my bowels, my three-year-old daughter got fed up and is now trying to potty-train me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 358

You deserved it 2 782

Today, I woke up to realize I got my period a week early. The day of the after-wedding brunch. In a sort of remote area. Without pads or tampons. I need to be at the breakfast in a half-hour. FML

I agree, your life sucks 780

You deserved it 192

Today, I had a lady come up to me in a store just to tell me how bad my acne was and what remedies I should use. I got so embarrassed, all I could say was, "OK" and, "Thank you" until she left me alone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 566

You deserved it 1 467

Today, my brother and I were talking about Ebola, when he says he would love to have the disease because of how famous it would make him. Plus, his college essays about him "fighting through the disease" would be "phenomenal". FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 172

You deserved it 3 629

Today, I thought I was being smooth by using a pickup line on a cute barista. I confidently said, "Are you a magician? Because whenever I look at you, everyone else disappears." She replied, "Actually, I'm a barista, and everyone else is waiting for their coffee. Next!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 122

You deserved it 1 151

Same thing different taste

Skids

Smooth move

Get the message

Top comments

Comments