Miscellaneous: Today, while a very cute girl was explaining the apartment's...

By NewTenant - 20/06/2011 07:37 - United States

Today, while a very cute girl was explaining the apartment's laundry machines to me, I blurted out, "It's okay, my pants are used to handling huge loads". FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 205

You deserved it 39 990

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Same thing different taste

Skids

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2014 but it's good stuff

Today, I walked into my house with a couple of friends and I saw my girlfriend doing laundry. I jokingly asked her if she had time to do a load of mine as well. She scoffed and said, "Yeah babe, I'll gladly do your laundry… The same day you learn to wipe properly." FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 770

You deserved it 55 316

By anonymous - 17/05/2016 00:29 - United States - Ashland

Today, at the laundromat. I loaded a huge load into the top dryer, put all the quarters in, and started the bottom one. I realized my mistake when I came to check on it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 167

You deserved it 3 829

By gtfb1993 - 02/12/2011 22:21 - Canada

Today, I was at the laundromat, when an attractive girl set up at the machine next to mine. She looked me up and down, then noticed the skid-marks on my underwear. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 688

You deserved it 42 486

By esv - 01/04/2009 09:18 - United States

Today, I went to the laundromat for the first time. I fit all of my clothes into two washers. Not knowing where to put the soap in, I asked a man doing his laundry, "Excuse me, where do I put the soap in?". He replied, "Ma'am, those are the dryers." FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 596

You deserved it 80 146

Smooth move

By nicole - 27/05/2011 20:52 - United States

Today, I saw a hot guy at the laundromat. Wanting an excuse to talk to him, I tossed a pair of my red underwear into his washer. What I didn't realize was that he was washing his whites. Thanks to me, he now has an entire load of pink shirts and boxers. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 348

You deserved it 78 696

Get the message

By thelandofoz - 14/10/2009 14:36 - United States

Today, I noticed that my clothes had shrunk. My mother seemed to be having trouble with the new washer and dryer so I tried to show her exactly how they work. After my explanation she said, "I know how they work. I shrank your clothes to give you some incentive to lose all that belly you got." FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 894

You deserved it 7 672

By BonGoWash - 07/02/2013 14:45 - United States - Bronxville

Today, I went to do my laundry. Having no laundry bag, I put clothes in a suitcase and headed to the basement. When my roommate saw me, she burst into tears with happiness. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 951

You deserved it 5 711

By smokin - 26/07/2011 21:22 - United States

Today, someone had the unique opportunity to be able to say to me, "Excuse me, your pants are on fire." FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 097

You deserved it 5 380

By beep_guacamole - 24/05/2009 21:49 - United States

Today, I went to the laundromat. I put a load in the dryer and walked away to check on my other load. When I came back, I saw a homeless man putting his dirty, wet underwear in the dryer with my clean clothes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 56 337

You deserved it 4 627

By Pickle - 06/07/2010 05:14 - United States

Today, I finally got around to doing laundry. The washing machines in my condominium building take about an hour to do a load. When I returned to throw my clothes in a dryer, I realized they were never washed in the first place. I used my card and detergent to pay for another person's laundry. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 005

You deserved it 32 119

mcxhunni 0

Monday 20 June 2011 15:49

maybe she thought you might have been referring to your dick... not dumping on yourself...

mxpklx 12

Monday 20 June 2011 15:55

someones socially awkward.

Comments

ChrisLTC 3

Monday 20 June 2011 15:56

If only there was another guy around for you to high 5!

Bandz_fml 3

Monday 20 June 2011 17:07

Mental self five!!

lauderdale80_fml 0

Monday 20 June 2011 20:36

awesome ... "HIGH FIVE"

hellokat1 0

Monday 20 June 2011 15:56

Maybe you should think before you speak next time.

Moota 9

Monday 20 June 2011 19:17

Yep! It's sad to know most people don't though.

amdnivram 1

Tuesday 21 June 2011 19:59

hey casazilla

lendalynn 5

Monday 20 June 2011 15:56

hahahahaha... eh don't worry honest mistake

maphineRAWRS 10

Monday 20 June 2011 15:57

would you rather her think you had a small penis?

Razwud 0

Monday 20 June 2011 16:14

Hahaha :)

TheIllusionist 0

Monday 20 June 2011 18:52

ahaha good point

clouds7 0

Monday 20 June 2011 15:58

gl with that sir :) hopefully she thought you were talking about ur dick :)

sblylaw 0

Monday 20 June 2011 19:29

thats what I thought!

cgchamp89 7

Monday 20 June 2011 15:59

Well, was it a true statement?

amerwin 3

Monday 20 June 2011 16:00

It sounds like you 'blew' your chances with her. Don't be surprised if you are now required to keep 100 yards away from her residence.

LookingForLolz10 0

Monday 20 June 2011 16:00

Aaaaaaaaaand she's gone.. I got it though :D/

emily14swim 0

Monday 20 June 2011 16:01

way to break the ice:)

YoLauryn 0

Monday 20 June 2011 16:03

So many smart ass comments I could make...but so little room.

Quest_ 13

Monday 20 June 2011 16:09

Like in his pants.

bengermin 5

Monday 20 June 2011 16:17

"My diapers are used to handling big loads...." Crap.

Keywords

Miscellaneous Embarrassing Awkward Sleep Work Love Dating Am I overreacting? Annoying Health Parents Mental health Furniture Kids Friends Gross Public freakouts Fight Neighbours Cops Drugs Relatable Medication Dogs Animals Teenagers Ironic Video games Gamers Zoom

The Top

Today, my boyfriend and I got intimate with each other for the first time. He shoved his hand down my pants, touched about an inch away from my clitoris, and whispered, "Cummm" in my ear. I doubt I'll have an orgasm ever again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 034

You deserved it 4 250

Today, while I was making out with my boyfriend, he left my dorm suddenly without telling me where he was going. A few hours later, he texted me to tell me that being with me made him feel dirty and he had gone to confession. He then called me a sinner. FML

I agree, your life sucks 83 551

You deserved it 7 856

The Top

Today, I realized it is now considered normal and routine that my boyfriend wets the bed after a night of drinking. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 952

You deserved it 4 905

Today, a classmate posted a recording of a recent lecture on my university's Facebook page, so we could listen again and take notes at home. A few minutes in, I heard myself asking a question. I then heard snorting and some girl muttering "dumb cunt" under her breath. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 089

You deserved it 4 471

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me because she thought I was cheating on her. With my own sister. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 197

You deserved it 4 377

Today, my boyfriend is 34 years-old. We’ve been together for 5 years. He refuses to propose to me because “marriage is expensive” and “kids drain your wallet.” That would be understandable if he hasn’t spent the majority of his paychecks on March Madness. FML

I agree, your life sucks 709

You deserved it 365

Today, my boyfriend started avoiding going down on me ever since he found an ingrowing hair down there. The only reason I have an ingrowing hair is because he didn’t like my pubes, and stopped having sex with me at all until I shaved it off, thus causing the ingrowing hair. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 324

You deserved it 352

Today, I asked my friend, once again, to pay me back the $500 she owes me. She got annoyed and told me, “I told you, my Cash App locked me out of my account!” When I mentioned Venmo, she said she'd forgotten her password to it, called me a "selfish c*nt", and hung up on me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 361

You deserved it 214

Same thing different taste

Skids

Smooth move

Get the message

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