Love: Today, while playing spin the bottle, my two spins landed on...

By Olihime - 10/01/2010 18:13 - United Kingdom

Today, while playing spin the bottle, my two spins landed on two really pretty girls. The first girl I missed and kissed her chin. The second girl I headbutted and gave a nosebleed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 070

You deserved it 44 424

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Same thing different taste

Spin on this

By foreveralone - 21/03/2020 06:00

Today, I had my first kiss. It would have been great if I wasn't playing spin the bottle as a 23-year-old. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 623

You deserved it 398

By Anonymous - 17/08/2010 07:10 - United States

Today, I was on my third date with this really cute girl. After a very romantic evening, I decided to go for the first kiss, but because of my nervous reflex in which I get bloody noses, I ended up bleeding all over her face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 601

You deserved it 4 901

By Anonymous - 14/10/2009 21:27 - United States

Today, I went to a party where I met some nice girls. One of them was really sweet and we were having a great time in my friend's backyard. As I was on the swing, I was gonna give her my number, but instead, I gave her a harsh kick to the face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 586

You deserved it 27 178

Cool moves

By littlegirl - 07/05/2011 04:46 - Canada

Today, I was sitting with my crush at lunch. Trying to flirt, I tried to stare seductively into his eyes while sucking on my straw. I missed. The straw shot straight up my nose, causing me the worst nose bleed of my life. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 585

You deserved it 45 364

By ILTali - 03/03/2009 23:00 - United States

Today, I was at a party and we were all playing Seven Minutes in Heaven. It was my crush's turn to spin the bottle so my heart started pounding. The bottle pointed towards me! Then my crush said, "With her it'd be 'Seven Minutes in Hell'. Just skip me." FML

I agree, your life sucks 121 825

You deserved it 8 187

By Bo - 22/04/2009 13:50 - United Kingdom

Today, I was at a party. The girl I'm madly in love with referred to me as her 'Gay Friend.' She refused to kiss me in Spin-the-Bottle as 'She didn't want to do anything with anyone that night'. She then made out, and slept with, my 'best friend' whom she had never met before. FML

I agree, your life sucks 80 434

You deserved it 6 715

By SaMike - 01/09/2009 01:12 - United States

Today, I took my girlfriend to the movies. She's pretty conservative and I decided after four dates to give her her first ever kiss. As I leaned in she violently sneezed and hit me in the nose with the hand she brought up to cover her face. I broke my nose and got blood down her cleavage. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 741

You deserved it 4 743

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By Anonymous - 11/08/2021 00:01

Today, I was making out with this guy when my nose started bleeding, and it got on his face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 869

You deserved it 99

By H-B - 28/04/2009 08:53 - United States

Today, I went out with a girl who I really love. We arrived to her house and before she got out of the car, I attempted to kiss her as planned. Still drunk, I grabbed her head and twisted it when I kissed her. She's now wearing a neck brace. Real smooth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 603

You deserved it 88 958

By Anonymous - 13/03/2011 22:26 - United States

Today, in an attempt to impress a girl I like, I tried to crush a soda can by hitting it with my forehead. Not only did I fail, I knocked myself out in the process. When I regained consciousness, the girl was gone and someone had taken the liberty of drawing a penis on my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 763

You deserved it 73 904

hannahuk1986 0

Sunday 10 January 2010 23:36

Count your blessings that there are two girls willing to kiss a klutz like you.

hotpockets92 0

Sunday 10 January 2010 23:18

smooth

Comments

fuzz97 23

Saturday 30 January 2010 6:49

what's wrong with you

mylifesgay 0

Sunday 1 August 2010 22:39

u must be a bad kisser? :P

xerxes190 3

Sunday 16 January 2011 11:25

wow you suck at kissing

FMLandurstoo 9

Friday 4 February 2011 5:21

get some?

thatswhayshesaid 0

Wednesday 20 April 2011 4:58

Nice going.

dfergy 5

Tuesday 3 May 2011 2:31

how do you miss a kiss? its not that hard

Liddo_Me_12 0

Wednesday 8 June 2011 5:18

Dude how can you miss a person's lips?

Fortitudine 3

Friday 10 June 2011 9:29

FAIL!!

xo_sweetheart_xo 0

Saturday 25 June 2011 7:36

wow how can you be that bad

THEMANSTER122 0

Tuesday 5 July 2011 15:18

you suck balls at kissing

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I agree, your life sucks 9

You deserved it 23

Today, I came out as lesbian and introduced my new girlfriend to my family. My mom angrily told me that I should have waited until my grandparents had died before coming out, and that I was "extremely disrespectful" for making this announcement. I honestly thought everyone would be fine with it. FML

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The Top

Today, I somehow mistook the Star of David for a Pentagram. My Jewish friends were not amused. FML

I agree, your life sucks 228

You deserved it 794

Today, I told my parents I no longer believe in the religion they strictly raised me under. They responded by kicking me out of the house. I'm broke, jobless, and the only person that will take me in is my psycho ex-girlfriend who never got over me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 619

You deserved it 16 477

Today, I was separating my notes into two piles: one to save for exam studying and one to throw out. I finished separating, picked up the junk pile, and absentmindedly shredded it. Afterwards, I looked down to see the junk pile still completely intact. Goodbye, passing grades. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 662

You deserved it 31 892

Today, I got a call from a really great company that I applied to work for, asking me to come in for an interview. When I went in, they had no appointment scheduled and no idea who I was. It turned out it was all a prank by my brother and his friends. My brother is 30. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 547

You deserved it 2 180

Today, the first gift I opened was from my uncle. It was $80 in clothes that I'd bought for myself a week earlier. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 225

You deserved it 707

Today, I'm so broke, I asked my parents if they'd pay for me to go to the eye doctor and consider it my Christmas present. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 141

You deserved it 2 413

Same thing different taste

Spin on this

Cool moves

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