Awkward, Drugs and Health: Tough guy, huh?

Tough guy, huh?

By Anonymous - 14/06/2012 20:59 - United Kingdom - Croydon

Today, my face got intimate with several plywood boards, and I suffered lacerations and bruising. I told my friends I got the wounds from taking a few guys down in a bar fight. Now they're dragging me out into a rough part of town to give them "muscle" while they try to score some crack. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 343

You deserved it 44 308

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 13/04/2016 08:25

Today, I woke up in hospital after a night of heavy drinking. My friends told me I was beat up by the doorman. After going to the club to watch the security footage, it was revealed I actually fell on my face trying to fight, and caused more damage to myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 569

You deserved it 11 413

By Anonymous - 24/12/2011 02:49 - Australia

Today, I was out clubbing, when some bloke at the bar started trying to pick fights with everyone. Trying to defuse the situation with humour, I said, "I used to be a tough guy like you. Then I took an arrow in the knee." The next thing I know, I have a broken nose. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 151

You deserved it 41 745

By shenmas - 08/07/2018 19:00

Today, while I was out walking with my girlfriend, I got beaten up and called an "abuser" by a gang of women who noticed bruises on my girlfriend's arms and legs. The bruises are from her karate class. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 357

You deserved it 264

Fight Club

By MyFaceHurts - 03/08/2010 10:40 - United States

Today, while at a local bar, my friends and I were approached by an overly intoxicated man who asked us each politely if we wanted to fight. Thinking it was a joke, I said yes. It wasn't a joke, I now have a broken nose and a black eye. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 858

You deserved it 55 527

By Stephen - 24/03/2012 21:07 - Sweden

Today, I was peppered with questions about my swollen eye and if I'd gotten into a fight. I couldn't bring myself to admit that I'd been brutally beaten into submission by a doorknob. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 291

You deserved it 3 915

Run!

By Anonymous - 05/11/2011 01:21 - United States

Today, I was dared to walk home through a rough part of town. My rep hung in the balance, so I accepted. A kid kicked a football in my direction, so I kicked it back at him hard. It hit him in the nuts, and the next thing I know, I'm running for my life from three bald, shirtless, six-packed thugs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 808

You deserved it 37 584

By deven - 29/08/2009 22:58 - United States

Today, I saw a fight so I went over to try and break it up. Someone thought I wanted to join in, so he gave me an unexpected whap in the happy sacks, and I also got a bloody nose for my troubles. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 737

You deserved it 44 798

By nosey - 08/04/2013 19:20 - United Kingdom - Mountain Ash

Today, I woke up with my face covered in blood. Turns out that yesterday at my colleague's birthday party, I got so drunk that I started yelling "Nappy time!" before falling out of my hammock and face-first onto the concrete ground. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 667

You deserved it 40 135

By Anonymous - 24/02/2013 17:36 - United States

Today, I went sledding with my friends. I said I was tired and didn't want to go, but they press-ganged me into it. I ended up sledding right into a tree, fracturing my leg, and scraping up my entire face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 962

You deserved it 5 449

By permanently scarred - 25/08/2018 15:00

Today, I was assaulted and knocked out by a girl at school for talking to her boyfriend. I woke up in the emergency room. After she knocked me unconscious, she took a knife and carved her initials into my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 943

You deserved it 260

xxmel 6

Friday 15 June 2012 5:32

You lied, so now you have to put up with the consequences.

purpadurp 6

Friday 15 June 2012 5:32

So many levels of fail -_-

Comments

erika729 1

Friday 15 June 2012 15:24

Ur only doing this bc u want drugs..only a crackhead wuld agree to go along w/it..get sum help

Azula272 14

Friday 15 June 2012 15:35

You will die.

brigham79 1

Friday 15 June 2012 16:27

pick better friends

random_jay 6

Friday 15 June 2012 16:36

You deserved it x 500000

snafu63 0

Friday 15 June 2012 16:55

wow, great friends you have there. I can tell that you're a great decision maker. Here's some advice, ditch these douche bags.

babyshaft408 8

Friday 15 June 2012 17:30

Crack raider razor raider. Sharp

BMc1824 0

Friday 15 June 2012 17:56

your friends are crack heads, who cares what they think?

lisey517 2

Friday 15 June 2012 18:20

I'm wondering why you got hit with several plywood boards.

lisey517 2

Friday 15 June 2012 18:21

If you're friends with crackheads, you are probably also a crackhead. Try not to sell your computer when the cravings are bad if you ever plan on getting clean.