Love: Today, I had to sit through an entire conversation where my sister...

By anonymous - 30/07/2015 22:04 - United States - Virginia Beach

Today, I had to sit through an entire conversation where my sister and her boyfriend sent voice messages to one another, of their farts. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 692

You deserved it 2 214

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Same thing different taste

By anonymous - 20/03/2012 22:33 - Canada - Saint John's

Today, my boyfriend discovered you can send sound clips as text messages. So far I've heard 5 of his farts in the past half hour. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 342

You deserved it 4 027

By Username - 14/07/2011 20:09 - United States

Today, I walked in on my father and brother attempting to harmonize their farts. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 332

You deserved it 5 773

By Anonymous - 11/09/2012 19:16 - Sweden - Guayanilla

Today, I had a serious talk with my boyfriend about our relationship troubles. He stopped me in the middle of a sentence with a huge fart. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 329

You deserved it 4 383

Oversharing is caring

By Lauren - 12/10/2011 17:55 - United Kingdom

Today, I introduced my boyfriend to my family. It was going well until my 23 year-old sister started telling him in detail about her constipation, and that if she doesn't take a shit in a few days, it's going to come out of her mouth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 466

You deserved it 2 866

By wendtinmypants - 31/05/2014 15:05 - United States - Omaha

Today, I took out my phone and realized I butt dialed my girlfriend and left her a 4 minute voicemail of me farting in an echoing toilet bowl. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 901

You deserved it 9 217

By Anonymous - 26/10/2012 07:23 - Australia - Queanbeyan

Today, I went out to a restaurant with a girl I have been dating. The only conversation was about how proud she was of her fart during work earlier, and how she managed to clear out a section of the office. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 918

You deserved it 3 238

Gassy

By MuteNToot - 26/02/2015 21:17

Today, my friend was confiding all her problems to me over Skype. I pressed the mute button so I could let out a fart, forgetting I'd already muted it earlier. I broke several minutes of my own silence with a devastating wet one. Now she won't talk to me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 975

You deserved it 14 358

Welcome to hell

By Anonymous - 14/01/2021 15:01 - Canada - Edmonton

Today, after meeting my boyfriend's family for the first time, I found out that he, his sister and their father enjoy talking loudly over the person who is currently talking, because what anyone else says is not worth listening to. FML

I agree, your life sucks 985

You deserved it 117

Skidmarks

By smelly asses - 17/09/2020 07:50

Today, my husband and my daughter engaged in a fart war. Guess who go to do a pile of shitty laundry, while the other texted his friends about the “hilarious” incident? FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 165

You deserved it 216

By ANNIEDBD - 23/03/2012 09:44 - Ireland - Dublin

Today, a client shouted at me over something that had nothing to do with me. She put such effort into shouting that she farted in my office. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 039

You deserved it 2 131

Khepre 22

Friday 31 July 2015 11:15

That is true love right there.

foreverfmls 10

Friday 31 July 2015 11:14

Well... At least they're comfortable with each other!

Comments

foreverfmls 10

Friday 31 July 2015 11:14

Well... At least they're comfortable with each other!

shessohighh 10

Saturday 1 August 2015 0:32

#relationshipgoals

punwpa 12

Sunday 2 August 2015 14:04

#relationshitgoals

chaylea 19

Tuesday 20 October 2015 23:51

#54 I see what you did there

Khepre 22

Friday 31 July 2015 11:15

That is true love right there.

echarlotte 19

Friday 31 July 2015 11:15

Close relationship?

Murilirum 23

Friday 31 July 2015 18:47

Airtight

LyricaSilvan 29

Friday 31 July 2015 19:49

You, sir, are brilliant.

GrinchFu1 27

Friday 31 July 2015 11:16

I tried to fart into my phone using the talk to text feature and nothing happened. I'm a little disappointed. Anyway, *fart noise.*

samuelreza 9

Friday 31 July 2015 11:16

that stinks man

AGhost5445 25

Friday 31 July 2015 11:20

Join in and make it a group message

DerrickJames 33

Friday 31 July 2015 11:24

In what scenario would you have to sit through that? Stuck in a car?

chuchusheep 19

Friday 31 July 2015 17:16

if they were stuck in a car with the two, that would be a pretty bad scenario in more ways than one.

RarityRoyale 17

Friday 31 July 2015 11:30

And who says that romance is dead...

aylind 18

Friday 31 July 2015 11:35

Don't be jealous op. You'll find someone to do that with someday as well :p

abNormal62 23

Friday 31 July 2015 11:42

Sounds like a gas...

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The Top

Today, at a supermarket, I ran into a girl I knew in high school. She had two kids with her and they were buying school supplies. My cart was full of beer and snacks. After a chat, she left, not before saying, "I hope things get better for you." I have a job and a girlfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 670

You deserved it 266

Today, I was trying to keep myself occupied due to my recent breakup. I was reading this book someone gave me about animal communication, so after a while, I figured I'd give it a shot. Then it dawned on me; I'm single, at home on a Friday night, and I'm trying to talk to my dog. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 809

You deserved it 7 174

The Top

Today, I've been working abroad. The holiday request I put in two months ago and that was verbally approved came back denied today as they can't find cover. I have already booked my flights, can't cancel them, and I get to spend Christmas alone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 796

You deserved it 748

Today, my boyfriend of six months, who happened to be my first kiss, broke up with me after borrowing 120 dollars. Not twenty minutes later, he was at the bar drinking with my brothers and my dad. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 304

You deserved it 207

Today, I brought my boyfriend to my house for the first time. He freaked out when he saw my cat, and had to leave because he's allergic. I've posted many pictures of my cat in Instagram, but he didn't say anything about his allergy because he thought it was just a random cat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 421

You deserved it 288

Today, I reassured everyone at work that the mark on my lip was just a pimple, not a cold sore. It's actually neither. I, a 21-year-old young woman, slipped while shaving my moustache and sliced off part of my lip. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 912

You deserved it 636

Today, after a guy I really liked and we decided to have sex, and he gagged and told me I stank when he got 'down there', I broke up with him, badly, but it's now a week later and I’m in hospital with a severe infection down there. He was right, and now he won’t take me back. FML

I agree, your life sucks 326

You deserved it 2 067

Today, while working at McDonald's, a woman asked me what came on a bacon, egg, and cheese biscuit. Trying not to laugh, I respond, "Bacon, egg, and cheese." She then realizes the stupidity of her question, and launches three dollars worth of quarters at my face and says, "Laugh at that, jerk." FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 618

You deserved it 6 594

Same thing different taste

Oversharing is caring

Gassy

Welcome to hell

Skidmarks

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