Alas, poor Donatello

By randomsamm - 17/10/2019 04:00 - United States - Birmingham

Today, I bought a turtle after wanting one for years. I was told that he was scared, so he would be put in a box for me to take home. It wasn't until I got to my car that I noticed that they sold me a dead turtle. I'm not getting a refund because they claimed I killed it in less than 5 minutes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 990

You deserved it 222

Winter: Snow and Funny News
Snuggle up and laugh with our winter stories, where snow isn't the only thing sliding around! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

By JhKhS - 14/09/2009 10:05 - United Kingdom

Today, I just came back from the vet. I spent a lot of money on a pet tortoise at the local pet store and it didn't come out of its shell when I bought it. The owner just said it sleeps in the day and it'll be shy for a week or so. Turns out it was dead. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 565

You deserved it 9 487

By RestlessDiesel - 18/04/2016 14:40 - United States - Hudson

Today, I pulled off the road to help a turtle cross it. Before I could get out of my car a dump truck ran over the turtle, splattering my car with turtle guts and bits of shell. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 078

You deserved it 1 838

By Anonymous - 15/06/2009 17:17 - United States

Today, my girlfriend dumped me and left me with the responsibility of the turtle that I never wanted but she insisted we buy "together." A little bit of research has revealed that Andre will live for "at least 30 years." FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 674

You deserved it 7 332

Pile on

By turtle - 12/07/2011 13:26 - United States

Today, I saw a turtle on the road so I swerved, and hit a tree. The people behind me then hit the turtle. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 617

You deserved it 12 684

By fish killer - 08/02/2013 03:58 - Canada

Today, I bought a fish. I put the tank on top of the fridge so my cat wouldn't get at it. I'd forgotten to buy some things for its tank, so I quickly ran out to get them. When I got home, I saw the tank destroyed on the floor, and my cat devouring my fish. I had the fish for less than an hour. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 271

You deserved it 29 827

Road rage

By Xtine - 23/06/2009 04:44 - United States

Today, while on the road, I saw a turtle in the middle of the other lane. I slammed on my brakes and got out, holding up, and pissing off, several drivers on both sides of the highway. Getting closer to the turtle, I realized that it was not a turtle at all, but a very large pile of dog shit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 617

You deserved it 46 321

Poor Mr Nibbles

By Karlo Kračun - 09/07/2020 08:08

Today, my mom wanted to surprise me by buying me a hamster. When I got into her car, I was actually surprised and even said, "Hi" to the hamster. When we got home, the hamster was dead. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 643

You deserved it 119

By hellostupid - 28/03/2013 08:19 - United States

Today, I had to convince my 20-year-old boyfriend that not only is his aquatic turtle a reptile, but that it's also cold-blooded and thus can't regulate its own temperature just by going into its shell. He still thinks I'm the stupid one. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 970

You deserved it 4 811

By Anonymous - 23/08/2012 16:50 - Canada - London

Today, while working at the pet store, I had to feed the snakes. I'd thawed too many mice, so instead of wasting one, I fed it to our turtles. They decided to play tug of war with it, ripping it in half in front of several terrified children. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 652

You deserved it 29 811

Get it!

By tay - 17/09/2013 15:44 - Canada - Erin

Today, it was my first day closing alone at a pet store when a lady came in wanting to return a bird she bought months ago. Once I informed her there were no returns on livestock, she let the bird free and ran out the door, leaving me to catch it and explain to my manager where it came from. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 647

You deserved it 2 845

RichardPencil 30

Thursday 17 October 2019 10:59

He's kicked the bucket. He's pushing up daisies. He's gone to meet his maker. This is an EX-turtle!

GreenNAngry 2

Thursday 17 October 2019 4:10

wow, this beyond sucks. poor turtle :( I feel like there could be a lawsuit somewhere in there... but even if not, maybe you could ask for a replacement turtle?

Comments

GreenNAngry 2

Thursday 17 October 2019 4:10

wow, this beyond sucks. poor turtle :( I feel like there could be a lawsuit somewhere in there... but even if not, maybe you could ask for a replacement turtle?

RichardPencil 30

Thursday 17 October 2019 4:33

'e's just resting. Beautiful plumage!

Sara Niemantsverdriet 12

Thursday 17 October 2019 10:43

E's pinin' for the fjords!

RichardPencil 30

Thursday 17 October 2019 10:59

He's kicked the bucket. He's pushing up daisies. He's gone to meet his maker. This is an EX-turtle!

jkjorn 16

Thursday 17 October 2019 15:19

No, no, 'e's just tired and shagged out after a prolonged run about 'is box!

Seeya55 31

Thursday 17 October 2019 18:06

Usually a pet shop will have a two-day 'warranty' on a pet. That if it does pass away you'll get a refund. Especially if you got in your car to look and it was dead. Can also say you'll call your credit card company for a charge back. Having that on the stores record can make dings on the owner for selling bad items and the owner will have to pay back either way. Sorry OP.

ThatOneLonelyAsian 31

Thursday 17 October 2019 20:54

So you picked a dead one? I'm sure you get to pick which one you want

EmDizzle2007 28

Thursday 17 October 2019 21:32

trash

AmbrosiaFan 18

Friday 18 October 2019 0:45

ALWAYS look at an animal and make sure its moving before paying and leaving with it.

JackFaire 27

Friday 18 October 2019 18:21

Apparently I'm one of the minority but I gave it a YDI because you bought a grab bag pet. Seriously this is like buying a car and not seeing the car before they hand you the keys. He's scared so we're going to put him in this box and you can't see him raises a serious amount of red flags.