Money and Scams: All scammed out - FML

All scammed out

By Anonymous - 14/06/2015 15:37 - Croatia - Zagreb

Today, my wife paid a man with a fake crystal and an even faker accent to investigate the creakiness of our apartment complex floors. $300 later, she told me he'd found a "sinkhole of chi energy" and that the building may collapse if we don't pay him to disperse it. I want a divorce. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 722

You deserved it 3 434

November 11: Memories and smiles
Historical anecdotes with a light touch to commemorate with a respectful smile. More…

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Same thing different taste

Cold reading

By Anonymous - 06/12/2014 21:52 - Belgium

Today, I found out why my wife has been cold and distant lately. She went to a psycho fraudster - sorry, I mean "psychic medium" - who said I'm lusting after other women and am thinking about leaving her. She actually believed him. Now I'm considering leaving her for real. Well played, I guess. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 861

You deserved it 3 616

By notabeliever - 29/07/2011 05:11 - United States

Today, my wife threw a piece of tofu cake at my head for suggesting that the money she'd spent on magic "healing" crystals and homeopathic "remedies" would've just as well been spent on a chocolate teapot. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 758

You deserved it 7 209

By Anonymous - 29/03/2013 05:37 - United States - Mariposa

Today, I found out that the money that my wife claims went into repairing her car engine actually is going towards helping her pay for a divorce. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 727

You deserved it 3 452

By Anonymous - 04/02/2012 02:48 - United Kingdom

Today, I argued with my girlfriend over her constantly wasting our money on acupuncture. She said if I could prove it was baloney, she would stop. After I showed her copious amounts of scientific proof debunking it as pseudo-science, she told me we're "taking a break" from our relationship. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 732

You deserved it 11 888

Our house, in the middle of our street

By Anonymous - 09/08/2021 02:01

Today, and over the years, my wife has methodically destroyed our house, insisting she is good at DIY. Our house is either in bits, half-finished or falling apart. I had it confirmed by a realtor, who assessed the house as worth 100 grand less than we paid for it. It’s a building site with a roof. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 199

You deserved it 213

By waste of effort - 15/05/2012 20:56 - United Kingdom

Today, my fiancée called our engagement off, because apparently she's actually a complete idiot who will believe anything that a slimy con artist tells her. In this case, a "psychic" who mumbled some shit about me having "a dark aura." FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 194

You deserved it 3 746

By Agathus - 10/11/2011 14:35 - United Arab Emirates

Today, my mother spent over $5,000 to fly in a Feng-Shui master, put him in a five-star hotel, and had him walk around our house with a compass, moving things to help improve the "energy flow." Now all I have in my room is an old mattress and lamp. He's coming back tomorrow. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 409

You deserved it 3 310

Slight anger issues

By IsabellaM - 27/05/2022 14:01

Today, my husband broke the vase and smashed the chandelier in the hallway, all because I asked him who he was on the phone with. His exact words were, “Do you ever just mind your fucking business? Goddamn!” Oh, and he told me I have to buy a new vase and replace the chandelier. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 110

You deserved it 204

All over the place

By Anonymous - 01/06/2024 15:00 - United States

Today, I got super psyched up about a landscaping project my wife denied last year that she's finally game for, which will both fix a water leak into the house, and make our backyard look amazing. I took a week of PTO, then 20 minutes later my wife called to tell me a tree in our back yard fell over. We're also probably getting divorced. FML

I agree, your life sucks 503

You deserved it 98

By mrrichkid - 06/03/2010 01:05 - United States

Today, my wife of four years confessed to me that she only married me for the money. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 008

You deserved it 3 705

Next

Top comments

Incognico 22

Monday 15 June 2015 0:07

I feel a special vibe... And predict a sinkhole in your wallet...

muarif 19

Monday 15 June 2015 0:06

Chill. Breathe in and out. Let the Chi flow through you....open up your chakras!

Comments

Mr_Original_ 11

Friday 31 July 2015 3:06

It's spelt Qi, not chi - chi is a Greek letter (χ)

Keywords

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The Top

Today, while working as a veterinary assistant, an owner stood extremely close to me and kept accidentally petting me instead of her dog. After her dog was examined, she asked me if I'd ever had the chickenpox because she has shingles and it's contagious to those who haven't. I haven't. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 700

You deserved it 321

Today, my boyfriend and I decided to try the ice cubes in the vagina thing we'd read about. He kept sticking one in after another and they got stuck. My vagina had a brain freeze for a half an hour. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 772

You deserved it 3 931

The Top

Today, I was arrested for kidnapping a child. MY child. Do you know how hard it is as a white man to convince a police officer that a latino toddler screaming, "Stranger danger!" is yours? FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 666

You deserved it 426

Today, I found out that my crippling sciatica is caused by my 32M size breasts on my petite frame. The same breasts that I've been begging doctors to reduce for nearly 10 years. They deny it's a "real problem" and I can't afford a private operation. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 353

You deserved it 326

Today, I found out my dad is dating my dead mom's best friend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 961

You deserved it 269

Today, as I was going to bed, I spotted a man staring at my window from a neighbor's yard. Ten minutes later, he was still there. I freaked out, started crying, and contemplated calling the cops. My creeper turned out to be the neighbor's wooden lawn ornament. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 458

You deserved it 37 398

Today, my mom found out about my brother smoking. She calmly discussed smoking with him. On the other hand, I got yelled at and made to do chores all day despite having a university exam, just because I knew about it but I didn't tell her, because I knew that I would get the short end of the stick. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 049

You deserved it 106

Today, I walked past a group of men at the mall and one of them mooed at me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 310

You deserved it 6 952