Intimacy: Beady eye

Beady eye

By Anonymous - 16/11/2019 18:00

Today, my bathroom flooded. I frantically cleaned my apartment as fast as I could before the plumber arrived. Everything was finally clean when I let him in. It wasn't until after he finished that I noticed I'd left my anal beads in the shower. There's no way he didn't notice. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 072

You deserved it 2 217

Winter: Snow and Funny News
Snuggle up and laugh with our winter stories, where snow isn't the only thing sliding around! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

No way

By Anonymous - 01/05/2013 18:41 - United States - Downey

I agree, your life sucks 30 873

You deserved it 58 880

Keeping warm

By Anonymous - 22/01/2021 11:01

Today, thanks to my habit of peeing in the shower, I accidentally peed in the bath. FML

I agree, your life sucks 258

You deserved it 1 300

Caught in 4K

By Anonymous - 14/06/2021 14:01 - United States - Kittanning

Today, my father-in-law decided to "fix" our bathtub and ended up flooding the bathroom. Later, in his attempt to clean things up, he walked, without permission, into my bathroom where my vibrator was right next to my hairdryer. He definitely saw it, and didn’t say anything to me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 908

You deserved it 462

By TheMissMuffly - 31/07/2012 15:53 - United States - Monmouth

Today, I wanted to take a romantic bath with my boyfriend. I set up the candles and hot water, but I had to take a dump. After my business was done, I called him into the bath. He walks in, sniffs, glances at the toilet and leaves. Guess what I forgot to flush. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 832

You deserved it 53 155

By anti-peecleaner - 22/11/2010 22:35 - United States

Today, my boyfriend walked out of the bathroom, informed me he'd accidentally peed on the floor, and told me I could clean it up when I get a chance. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 444

You deserved it 5 234

By TheKingDavis - 14/02/2011 07:11 - United States

Today, after dealing with tons of drama and working a 14 hour shift, I took a shower. When I stepped out, a weak spot in the floor gave way. While falling through the floor I grabbed the toilet tank lid, which fell into the tank and broke it. Now my leg hurts and the bathroom's flooded. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 106

You deserved it 3 196

By KitchenFlooder - 01/02/2018 01:30

Today, I flooded my entire kitchen. The water was cut off at night and I left the faucet open without realizing. When the sound woke me up at 5am, the water reached my ankles. I frantically tried to sweep it out before my mother woke up at 6am. I didn't make it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 537

You deserved it 1 857

By robbyrabbit - 11/11/2010 07:41 - United States

Today, I went to the place I signed for yesterday to pay the first month's rent and get my keys. I looked around before I left, and used the toilet. I went back later to show my boyfriend and found the place flooded an inch with water coming from the toilet. It had been flooding for 7 hours. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 119

You deserved it 4 738

By LizGo - 17/11/2013 06:00 - United States - Greenville

Today, after just having used the bathroom, my ring fell in the toilet. After stealthily removing it with a toothbrush, I went to go wash it in the sink. It then fell down the drain. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 435

You deserved it 14 698

Hard work

By seanzynotfonzyehhhhh - 04/08/2016 05:16 - United States

Today, my boss told me to find the bad smell coming from the apartment we were working on. I found the bathtub about 4 inches high full of piss, and spent the next hour bailing it out into a bucket because the drain wasn't connected yet. I have pee stains in all the wrong places. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 691

You deserved it 870

JackFaire 27

Saturday 16 November 2019 18:46

Um neither? Seriously unless your plumber is your friend or family this will never affect your life

jbuckets_404 38

Sunday 17 November 2019 0:07

Ah, don't worry. He's seen/ encountered *far* worse. It's a well-known occupational hazard. Hell, he/ wife might even have their own.

Comments

JackFaire 27

Saturday 16 November 2019 18:46

Um neither? Seriously unless your plumber is your friend or family this will never affect your life

RichardPencil 30

Saturday 16 November 2019 18:46

Just say they're your rosary and that you pray in the shower.

jbuckets_404 38

Sunday 17 November 2019 0:07

Ah, don't worry. He's seen/ encountered *far* worse. It's a well-known occupational hazard. Hell, he/ wife might even have their own.

GamerChickxoxo 16

Sunday 17 November 2019 1:39

ex gf and i left a rather large pink vibrator in the shower before, we had roommates at the time. I've also forgotten anal beads, and most recently a bad dragon(bruiser) ***** in the shower. just be thankful he didnt take a souvenir photo lol

riley873 21

Sunday 17 November 2019 23:15

I THOROUGHLY appreciate the fact that you let us bad dragon shoppers know which one!!! It made the whole comment

julfunky 29

Monday 18 November 2019 14:26

How is it that the shower anal beads weren’t the first thing that popped into your mind when the plumber was coming over? I wouldn’t worry about it. You probably made his day; stored in the memory bank of “weirdest things you’ve seen.” Your face may fade from his memory but your anal beads will live on.