Health, Embarrassing and Intimacy: Disorderly conduct

Disorderly conduct

By Never Going Back To The Doctor - 04/07/2013 07:03 - United States

Today, at the doctor's, I had lots of papers to fill out so my boyfriend offered to help. We submitted them and the doctor called me a few minutes later. Under disorders my boyfriend had written, "Major cock craving disorder." The doctor couldn't stop giggling. FML

I agree, your life sucks 65 768

You deserved it 12 467

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Same thing different taste

By NewDrugs - 22/02/2013 01:21 - United States - Charlotte

Today, I went back home after seeing the doctor, I told my boyfriend my new medicine might cause some mood swings. He immediately grabbed his phone and pretended to take a call, then rushed out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 249

You deserved it 3 535

By manlyman - 05/04/2009 13:32 - United States

Today, I went to the doctor's office because my wife and I are having some fertility problems. As I removed my pants, the doctor simply looked at my penis and said, "Mhm." My wife laughed the whole way home. FML

I agree, your life sucks 78 309

You deserved it 5 309

By jons - 17/02/2009 21:54 - United States

Today, I went to the doctor for my yearly checkup. After getting my blood-pressure taken, my finger pricked, etc, the doctor began to ask me some questions. When asked if I was sexually active, I responded "Yes". The doctor started laughing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 518

You deserved it 3 608

By DaChief - 31/05/2016 03:17 - United States - Highland Park

Today, I went to the doctor. They did a test and said they would email me the results. My girlfriend saw the email that said "The test was positive", and now she thinks I'm cheating on her with someone named Doctor Johnson. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 376

You deserved it 1 107

Fun fun fun!

By manchild bf - 02/10/2024 00:00 - United States - New York

Today, my boyfriend was helping me with my medications. While I called the pharmacy, I looked over and saw him making the pill bottles fight each other, with sound effects and funny voices. He's 33. FML

I agree, your life sucks 112

You deserved it 456

By doctorsandnurses - 13/01/2012 10:47 - United Kingdom

Today, after a hard day on the wards as a trainee doctor, I went home and started getting frisky with my girlfriend. All I could think about was the anatomical names for what I was touching and doing. I felt physically sick. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 768

You deserved it 4 600

By Anonymous - 02/05/2009 00:05 - United States

Today, I went to the doctor for a checkup. The doctor went through the normal questions, then paused for a moment and jotted something down. Later when I got back my report from the checkup, I noticed that the doctor had checked the "no" box by "sexually active." She didn't even ask me that. FML

I agree, your life sucks 84 453

You deserved it 6 474

By blehhh - 04/04/2009 03:10 - United States

Today, I went to see my gynecologist. She was writing my symptoms up in my chart on her computer. After a little while, I noticed that she had a confused look on her face and was reading something instead. When I took a peek at the computer screen, I saw that she was Googling my symptoms. FML

I agree, your life sucks 98 245

You deserved it 4 582

Hello goodbye

By mydatinglifesucks - 15/06/2014 06:31 - United States

Today, I had a date with a man who works as a psychiatrist. He diagnosed me with borderline personality disorder during dinner. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 855

You deserved it 6 794

By TheIVkindaruinsthemood - 05/08/2015 18:58 - United States - Milford

Today, my boyfriend got upset that I wouldn't give him head. He was visiting me at the hospital. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 041

You deserved it 2 879

xlord 27

Thursday 4 July 2013 18:42

Did he prescribe you a *****?

xlord 27

Thursday 4 July 2013 18:44

Did your boyfriend also write 3 hours long under sex?

Comments

TecheyTim 14

Saturday 13 July 2013 1:11

I could see myself doing that.....I could also see my girlfriend ripping my nuts off of my body after I did that.

BlackMoon_fml 9

Thursday 18 July 2013 2:35

Hell yeah don't be ashamed

WICKEDxANGEL 13

Thursday 18 July 2013 4:08

dat just wrong lol

khodginssxo 14

Friday 19 July 2013 3:42

LMAO! I would be like so embarrassed, I've had the same doctor since I was born. So funny though

priscilla_28 5

Friday 2 August 2013 6:03

Hahaha! I'll have to try that on my boyfriend some time.

Brak_Spaceman 19

Tuesday 6 August 2013 17:36

I too have that disorder.

kyla_milan13 5

Monday 14 October 2013 6:53

Maybe you should stop bring such a **** craver? *****.

Jackel0228 12

Wednesday 8 January 2014 19:10

You have to admit that's pretty damn funny....

cats54321 19

Thursday 15 October 2015 10:15

That is so immature smh

Matthew Justus 3

Friday 23 June 2017 3:06

That's hilarious

Keywords

Miscellaneous Weddings Awkward Love My ex Jealousy Friends AITA Health Embarrassing Poopoo peepee Relatable Therapy Mental health Covid Argument Kids Parenting Thanksgiving Medication Ironic Cute Sports Proposal Snow Cold weather Annoying Cheating Money Work

The Top

Today, I was denied food stamp assistance. Apparently, you need to work 20 hours a week while being a full time student to qualify or have a work study. I was recently suspended from my work study for calling off because my aunt died, and if I worked 20 hours a week, why would I need food stamps? FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 150

You deserved it 5 868

Today, I really wanted to spend a night of passion with my lover, so I'd arranged to meet him in a very classy hotel, gave him the room number, and waited for him in a super-sexy outfit. There was a knock at the door, so I opened it slowly and enticingly, assuming it was him. It was room service. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 406

You deserved it 11 953

The Top

Today, I realized that the bird I supposedly heard during the night throughout my childhood is actually the sound my mom makes when she comes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 206

You deserved it 3 240

Today, I tried buying a video game that was rated "M - for mature". The Cashier told me "you have to be 17 to buy this game". I didn't have any ID on me. I'm 25. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 970

You deserved it 4 338

Today, I told my dad I was going to Walgreens and asked if he needed anything. He needed condoms, and that I should call him when I get there so he can explain the kind he likes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 68 446

You deserved it 5 478

Today, while reading "1984" on the train, a cute guy around my age and I got into a great a discussion about the book. Just when I thought he might ask for my number, he got up, patted me on the head and said it's so nice that kids my age still took interest in real literature. I'm 25. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 192

You deserved it 3 294

Today, my younger sister stopped talking to me. I got engaged to my boyfriend of 4 years and apparently, she's been in love with him since she met him. Through me. She's 12. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 865

You deserved it 2 911

Today, I was waiting at home for a phone call. While I was in the bathroom, the phone rang. I quickly stopped my business and ran out of the bathroom with my pants round my ankles. I leaped over the couch, tripping and then stubbing my toe while hopping to the phone. It was a telemarketer. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 430

You deserved it 13 710

Disorderly conduct

Same thing different taste

Fun fun fun!

Hello goodbye

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