Gross, Roommate and Miscellaneous: Dude, WTF?

Dude, WTF?

By Anonymous - 18/03/2016 20:57 - United States - Valley Stream

Today, my roommate reached a whole new level of laziness: I caught him casually peeing into an empty beer bottle while laying in bed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 538

You deserved it 1 374

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Same thing different taste

By notestojenn - 05/07/2012 02:55 - United States - Manchester

Today, I walked into my roommate's room to ask him a question, only to see a pitcher with over a pint of urine in it sitting on his bookcase. This is at least the fifth conversation in a year I've had with him about not peeing in containers in his room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 022

You deserved it 2 106

By gold3nshow3r - 09/03/2017 20:00 - United States - Roanoke

Today, I woke up to a strange wetness covering my body. My drunk roommate's urine. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 574

You deserved it 436

By Anonymousse - 13/11/2015 12:34 - United Kingdom - Pontypridd

Today, my roommate came home after a night of heavy drinking and started urinating on my bed. When I confronted him, he just slurred, "Sorry, thought it was my bed." FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 781

You deserved it 1 559

Genius

By Anonymous - 18/01/2011 18:35 - United States

Today, my extremely lazy roommate is in bed with the flu. Instead of getting up to get water, he's run the garden hose through his window, and instead of going to the bathroom, he's connected a siphon to his penis and run it to a 5-gallon bucket. I have to live with this idiot. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 584

You deserved it 5 196

Kinky.

By Domo731 - 05/11/2017 13:00 - United States - Johnson City

Today, I drank from a soda can that was on my floor. Unfortunately, it was my boyfriend’s pee. He was too lazy to go to the bathroom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 338

You deserved it 4 958

Gross!

By cantstopfeelingit - 16/12/2019 05:00

Today, my roommate moved out. When I went into his room, I found a few things he forgot. Specifically, his beer bottle filled with nail clippings. I emptied it onto my hand before I realized what it was. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 209

You deserved it 2 490

Hangover time

By Anonymous - 16/12/2010 20:30 - United States

Today, I woke up to find that I'd left my clothes in my roommate's bedroom. After returning from a night of heavy drinking, I apparently got up to use the bathroom and used her room as a toilet. I don't remember this, but pee stains don't lie. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 336

You deserved it 30 377

By gp28 - 18/02/2010 20:08 - United States

Today, I woke up to hear my boyfriend drunkenly crashing around in the living room, after peeing in an ashtray because he thought it was a urinal. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 930

You deserved it 4 011

By anon - 23/03/2011 04:56

Today, I walked in on one of my housemates pissing in the kitchen sink full of dirty dishes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 731

You deserved it 3 934

Morning pick-me-up

By Anonymous - 30/01/2011 05:05 - United States

Today, upon waking up, I took a sip on what I thought was a cup of water on my nightstand. I quickly discovered it was my roommate's cup of used mouthwash which she was too lazy to throw out the night before. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 965

You deserved it 8 665

seemetrot_fml 16

Saturday 19 March 2016 20:05

Somehow I feel like this is a common occurrence for university students..

Elielili 13

Saturday 19 March 2016 20:04

Beer tastes like piss anyways, you won't notice the difference;)

Comments

aelarol 5

Saturday 19 March 2016 21:10

99 bottles of piss in my room, 99 bottles of piss...........

hamiltonma 22

Saturday 19 March 2016 21:26

Genius or lazy? That is the real question! Haha

rebeccabyram 15

Saturday 19 March 2016 22:15

Top it off with beer, chill it and give it too him. Perfect revenge

mwali02 32

Saturday 19 March 2016 22:21

Good thing the semester is almost over. I hope that you can start looking for new living arrangements OP... I wouldn't tolerate that.

Bonafonte 24

Saturday 19 March 2016 23:32

Ew, that has got to smell. Be strong, OP!

SmittyJA24 26

Saturday 19 March 2016 23:37

Get a new roommate next semester... Good luck!

travidebla 8

Saturday 19 March 2016 23:54

Wait until he forgets and he tries to take a sip of that. Karma

EmmaMK 35

Saturday 19 March 2016 23:59

He was just copying the behaviour of a couple of disgusting English football players.

FelicityWishes 32

Sunday 20 March 2016 0:18

Real penis envy right now.

AviShtap 20

Sunday 20 March 2016 1:06

Same! Right now, I've got some real Freudian feels going.

goozeo 11

Sunday 20 March 2016 0:22

Way of the road Bubbs

Keywords

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The Top

Today, my girlfriend will only have sex when she's on her period, because it's the only time she gets horny. She also gets body acne, bloating, and utterly foul BO and gas. The sex is so unpleasant, I'm starting to wish she just got cranky and emotional. FML

I agree, your life sucks 410

You deserved it 211

Today, I've spent nearly three weeks indulging my boyfriend's weird fetish, where he wears a hockey mask and I call him Jason. He just confessed it isn't really a fetish for him and that was just fucking with me. He's already told all his friends. I'm humiliated. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 245

You deserved it 4 765

The Top

Today, while at a trampoline park, my time of the month and my out-of-shape body worked together to make me almost pass out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 039

You deserved it 2 028

Today, I was told I'll need a hysterectomy. I'm barely 22. My doctor said "You probably wanted kids, huh? That's gonna be rough!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 904

You deserved it 1 404

Today, my boss asked about Anime because her new boyfriend is obsessed with it and she wants to understand. I was showing her some classics like Fullmetal Alchemist and One Piece when she was called away, leaving me with anime on my work computer. My manager then saw it and gave me a written warning. FML

I agree, your life sucks 477

You deserved it 158

Today, we were closing the restaurant early. I begin mopping as a couple walks in. The lady slips and falls, and to avoid a lawsuit, we offer them free food. After they left, I slipped on the freshly mopped kitchen floor with dishes in my hands. I didn't get free food. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 979

You deserved it 8 736

Today, while spring cleaning, my cat came into the kitchen with a live mouse in her mouth. She looked me dead in the eyes and dropped the mouse, which then ran into my bedroom. It's been 4 hours and I still can't find it. Where's the cat? Chilling like nothing happened. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 427

You deserved it 3 633

Today, my friend and I went to a tacky-themed party. She was wearing orange faux snake stilettos. I commented, "Those are perfect for tonight, where'd you manage to find such hideous shoes?" It turns out she wears those shoes all the time, the color just matched her outfit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 623

You deserved it 44 508