Sex, Thief and Intimacy: Duped

Duped

By Ennui - 20/02/2010 19:12 - United States

Today, after being dumped just 48 hours prior, I awoke from a night of passionate lovemaking with my ex. Last night, he came to my house, romanced me, and presented a possible future. This morning, when I got up to use the restroom, my laptop, money, and ex-boyfriend were gone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 422

You deserved it 10 326

St. Patrick's Day: Shamrocks and Tribulations
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Same thing different taste

By Iamlonesometonight - 26/03/2017 18:47

Today, my now-ex dumped me at a house party, which I then couldn't leave, as all my things were at his house, where I was meant to be staying. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 321

You deserved it 341

By Stranded - 17/07/2009 07:58 - United States

Today, I got back from a romantic vacation at a fancy hotel with my boyfriend of 6 months. After a steamy love session, I confessed that I was in love with him. Later, when I got out of the shower, all his stuff was gone and I was stuck with the entire week's hotel cost and no ride home. FML

I agree, your life sucks 63 901

You deserved it 6 749

By kaitlynn - 01/02/2010 20:56 - France

Today, at four in the morning, I was asleep with my boyfriend beside me. I started yelling at him in my sleep and broke up with him. When I woke up, he was gone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 883

You deserved it 10 264

By Bigfatfailure - 28/03/2013 10:02 - United States - Garden Grove

Today, I got dumped during sex. FML

I agree, your life sucks 73 531

You deserved it 9 868

By XYZee - 22/08/2012 20:27 - United States - Rockmart

Today, after quite a long work day, I got home to find my house had been broken into. Everything but my sleeping boyfriend was gone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 953

You deserved it 2 009

Make up to…

By single pringle - 05/11/2014 01:16 - United States - Morristown

Today, my boyfriend came home from college for the first time in weeks just to visit me. I was so excited that I spent two hours getting ready. Turns out he was only coming back to dump me. Now I'm single and out of foundation. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 949

You deserved it 4 444

Get out

By wtf - 14/03/2011 04:07

Today, I came back to my boyfriend's house where I've been staying to find all my things thrown outside, ruined, including my entire CD collection, textbooks and clothes cut up. All because I had left my phone there and had got a text from a guy saying, "Hi, how have you been?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 59 548

You deserved it 8 970

By Toilettrash - 06/07/2012 10:51 - United States

Today, I was brutally dumped over webcam, by my boyfriend, who was taking a dump with the laptop on his lap. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 954

You deserved it 2 889

Are you serious?

By ummno - This FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I was awakened in the middle of the night by a frantic banging on my front door. It was a guy whom I'd only been dating a few weeks, with a suitcase. He stated that his wife kicked him out for having an affair, and thought now would be a good time to move in together. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 012

You deserved it 13 725

By red - 27/09/2012 11:37 - United States - Portland

Today, my ex dropped by to pick up a piece of art he'd left when I threw him out a month ago. While here, he visited the restroom. Tonight, my shampoo smelled like urine. And he called at 11pm to say he'd ''rubbed one out'' on my new boyfriend's toothbrush. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 096

You deserved it 8 273

perdix 29

Sunday 21 February 2010 1:22

Annie, are you OK? Are you OK, Annie? You've been hit by a Smooth Criminal.

DGross 8

Sunday 21 February 2010 1:22

Go to his house tonight... romance him till he falls asleep then grab your stuff back, kick him where it hurt and tell him to go Fu*k himself... problem solved

Comments

NotMeh 0

Sunday 21 February 2010 9:50

lol... I just moderated this fml like an hr ago.

hawkie409 0

Sunday 21 February 2010 11:07

Call the cops, and then seduce him once your stuff is back. Then take a match that can't be traced, preferrably one from his house, and burn his stuff, being careful not to burn the house down.