Cold weather, Injury and Work: Frostbite

Frostbite

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2010 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I was cold and alone at work, so I decided to try and warm myself up on the panini toaster. As I was holding the top side open and my other hand over the hot metal, I accidentally closed the door on my hand. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 525

You deserved it 41 851

Winter: Snow and Funny News
Snuggle up and laugh with our winter stories, where snow isn't the only thing sliding around! More…

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 26/08/2009 18:55 - United States

Today, I accidentally ran my thumb down the cheese grater while preparing lunch beside my wife. I instantly jerked my hand away from the grater just in time run my forearm across the knife she was using. I now have 20 stitches and 5 staples in my arm, no lunch, and a puking wife. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 862

You deserved it 4 723

Smoking is so cool

By Burnt - This FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I accidentally set my hair on fire while lighting a cigarette. I panicked and put it out by slapping myself in the face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 897

You deserved it 61 546

Handy

By screwed - This FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I was teaching a woodshop class. We were using power tools, including drills, and pieces of pine wood. While helping a kid to hold a piece to practice drilling, he went too far forward with the drill. It went through my hand. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 228

You deserved it 12 243

I hate myself

By trixanne - This FML is from back in 2015 but it's good stuff - Australia - Sydney

Today, anticipating another stressful day of work, I left my house with a cluster of thoughts in my mind. It was only when I heard my front door lock behind me, my hand still resting on the handle, that I realised I had forgotten my house keys. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 719

You deserved it 3 948

Brain fog

By FlyingCoffeeMonster - This FML is from back in 2016 but it's good stuff - United States - Oreland

Today, I was having my morning coffee while getting ready for work. I grabbed clothes off the floor to throw in the hamper. I accidentally threw my full coffee instead. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 062

You deserved it 3 219

The struggle

By lizi - This FML is from back in 2017 but it's good stuff - United Kingdom - Saint Andrews

Today, I accidentally punched myself in the face while trying to take my bra off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 047

You deserved it 838

Say it, don't spray it

By ... - This FML is from back in 2008 but it's good stuff - France

Today, I was on a train, sitting next to an old man who was reading a newspaper. Suddenly, he sneezed without putting his hands over his nose. Instead of turning towards the window, he turned towards me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 925

You deserved it 2 301

Dude, what the…?

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2010 but it's good stuff - Canada

Today, I woke up to my apartment filled with smoke, fire alarms blaring. My roommate set my kitchen on fire while making hot dogs. This is the fourth time this has happened. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 042

You deserved it 4 755

Use the force

By BlueMacaw - This FML is from back in 2015 but it's good stuff - United States - Lake Elsinore

Today, I accidentally threw a glass of iced tea in my own face, because the restaurant I'd been going to for over a decade switched from heavy glass mugs to identical light-as-a-feather plastic mugs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 438

You deserved it 4 697

Boxing

By Holly - This FML is from back in 2012 but it's good stuff - United States - Colorado Springs

Today, I had to wait in a hospital room because I cut myself with a knife while trying to open a box of soda. After three stitches, I went home only to notice the box has an easy-open tab. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 519

You deserved it 32 193

DocBastard 38

Monday 22 November 2010 0:40

Next time you're cold, try sticking your head in the oven.

anorexicbarbie 8

Monday 22 November 2010 0:10

Chicken

Comments

WhatTheFuq 0

Monday 22 November 2010 4:27

me me. I want a hug!!

BigEV 0

Monday 22 November 2010 4:36

Any other bright ideas, OP?

Blacksabbath211 9

Monday 22 November 2010 4:44

try a sweatshirt or hot drink in the future...like when you regain feeling in your hand...eventually.......ydi

robc32ca 4

Monday 22 November 2010 4:54

"accidentally"? really? please don't reproduce...

BigEV 0

Monday 22 November 2010 4:58

Darwin Award time?

DocBastard 38

Monday 22 November 2010 6:01

This would be an award winner only if OP had panini'ed his panini, if you catch my drift.

BigEV 0

Monday 22 November 2010 6:27

Thus rendering him unable to reproduce. Such a story would qualify for an award.

smashgrab 0

Monday 22 November 2010 6:28

Doc never fails to make me chuckle! I salute your witty greatness!

Draminicaus 0

Monday 22 November 2010 15:23

If she Panini'ed.....her nipple? lol

dicklover69 0

Monday 22 November 2010 4:58

You so dumb. My grandma would have known better and she have no hands

zarii 0

Monday 22 November 2010 5:20

am pretty sure u didnt feel cold after that :P

Anti09 1

Monday 22 November 2010 6:27

Everybody participating in that combo meme was retarded. Props @C-C-Combo breaker guy. Oh, and YDI OP. You're retarded as well, for burning yourself on what is probably the simplest piece of kitchenware ever invented.

sallen0046 4

Monday 22 November 2010 7:09

Invest in a jacket, idiot. It's a toaster oven, not a heater. It's November, dress appropriately and you won't have an issue.

besosforme 26

Monday 22 November 2010 7:11

OP, I'd say your mission was accomplished now, wasn't it? I bet your hand had never been warmer.

sammy22 0

Monday 22 November 2010 7:39

and if your really smart, go to the bathroom n stick your hands under the heaters cuz we all know our world is trying to be green by having them in there.