Relatable and Awkward: **** off

**** off

By Anonymous - 23/07/2019 14:03

Today, my wife let two Jehovah's Witnesses in for a chat, then deliberately went to a neighbour's for "Two minutes," and left me with them for half-an-hour, with them refusing to take my hints to leave. In the end, I told them to fuck off, just as the wife arrived home, and she got mad at me for being rude. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 835

You deserved it 224

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Same thing different taste

By lonely - 12/04/2010 00:27 - United States

Today, the Jehovah's Witnesses were at my door. Normally I don't give them the time of day, but I was so lonely for company, I let them in. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 077

You deserved it 7 757

By :/ - 20/02/2011 18:44 - Canada

Today, I had my buddies over for a few beers and, trying to be cool, I told my wife to get out of the living room and back in the kitchen. I felt smug, right up until she said, "Why? Your mom doesn't need to be turned over for another 20 minutes, dick." FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 061

You deserved it 109 693

By :(( - 25/04/2012 18:46 - United States - Saint Petersburg

Today, I heard my neighbors having a violent argument in their front yard. I listened in, and soon found out why the wife wasn't happy with her husband. Apparently, she had caught her husband peeking through my windows for the second time this month. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 922

You deserved it 2 397

By Anonymous - 17/04/2018 01:30

Today, my husband and I were getting busy on the living room couch when my mother-in-law stopped by and let herself in with a key we didn’t know she had. She then demanded an apology like it was all our fault and stormed out. I still don’t know why she came by. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 894

You deserved it 395

Man caver

By Anonymous - 04/05/2023 18:00

Today, my wife screamed, cried, called me lazy and a bad parent, and threatened to leave and take our four kids. All I did was ask for an hour to myself every day for some private time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 621

You deserved it 1 183

Annoying neighbors ruin everything

By so much for relaxing - 21/07/2021 06:01

Today, I decided to sit on the back porch for a while to enjoy the nice weather and relax. Unfortunately, one of my neighbors was outside too, having a very loud argument with his wife for about 45 minutes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 971

You deserved it 94

It's sus to us

By Clean up time - 15/11/2023 08:00

Today, I sat my husband down for a talk for him to stop going to his female coworker’s house until 1-2am. He insists they’re doing work projects. He became so offended that I thought otherwise that he thrashed the entire living room, stomped out of the house, and slammed the door, completely dislodging it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 914

You deserved it 147

Neighborly

By Anonymous - 14/05/2024 23:00

Today, I needed emergency work on my house, so I’ve been taking wine, beer, and chocolates to my neighbours as an apology for the noise and dust. Later, one of the husbands came round and punched me for showing him up, because he hasn’t given his wife chocolates in years, so she’s mad at him and he blames me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 613

You deserved it 117

Just dependa things

By Anonymous - 02/09/2022 18:00 - United States

Today, and since we moved on base, my neighbor’s wife has tried to have an affair with me. I got tired of it and told him. He blew smoke. I found out she’s in a cheating wife’s club, who all defend each other. She proclaimed to all our neighbors that I’m a predator and I'd attacked her. They believe her instead of my wife, who saw everything. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 579

You deserved it 120

What did I say, Roy?

By Peter - 30/06/2021 18:01

Today, my wife said I was being difficult and unreasonable, and called my mother to talk to me about my behaviour. What did I do, you ask? I dared to share my opinion on something I happen to feel strongly about, instead of just mindlessly agreeing with her opinion like I have for the past 22 years. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 185

You deserved it 283

mackdeezy 22

Tuesday 23 July 2019 15:28

Honestly, that was pretty low of her. I'm trying hard not to be negative here, but if I didnt know any better, I'd say she planned this, and went off to go commit adultery. Being on this site has taught me that sometimes, life takes a wrong turn.

BurnInDemonFire 34

Tuesday 23 July 2019 17:37

Tell her to **** off, as well. And I wouldn't be surprised if "mackdeezy" was right.

Comments

mackdeezy 22

Tuesday 23 July 2019 15:28

MidnaLink 33

Tuesday 23 July 2019 15:40

I’d probably not even have bothered hinting.

BurnInDemonFire 34

Tuesday 23 July 2019 17:37

Tell her to **** off, as well. And I wouldn't be surprised if "mackdeezy" was right.

RichardPencil 30

Tuesday 23 July 2019 18:24

Why did you have to tell them to **** off? “I’m not interested. Would you please leave?” would suffice.

Charlie Given 26

Tuesday 23 July 2019 18:33

I don't know if you have ever dealt with the Jehovah's witnesses but ya pretty much have to throw them out they ignore hints , but the easiest way to get rid of them is to scare them off

RichardPencil 30

Tuesday 23 July 2019 18:40

I have. I’ve engaged them when I have time and want to have fun, but I’ve successfully warded them off with firm, but polite resolve when I’m not in the mood.

Charlie Given 26

Tuesday 23 July 2019 18:37

Ya they suck 😒 year's ago they wouldn't stop harassing me even after I told them please not to come around and told them off finally it took me answering the door with a ketchup covered knife that looked like blood and asked if they wanted to join in my goat sacrifice they never bothered me again 🤣🤣😂

Henry8cooper 15

Tuesday 23 July 2019 18:54

let me guess....in your relationship.... your wife is the brighter one?

mas12806 24

Wednesday 24 July 2019 0:39

You could’ve told them to leave, instead of giving a half hour worth of hints

JasonThorn 20

Wednesday 24 July 2019 5:27

"When you invite people you like and leave me with them, I am not responsible for what happens next."

LostSoul 19

Wednesday 24 July 2019 21:22

My uncle was a jehovah's witness minister. With that said, last time the mormons were here we told them our lord Satan would not approve of us talking to them. They have never been back. No religious group comes near my house.