Intimacy: Get it on

Get it on

By WentInABush - 15/11/2012 07:23 - United States - Portland

Today, while in my room on the computer, I had a sudden urge to pee. I got up to use the loo and started hearing some disturbing noises from inside. Apparently I was so quiet my parents thought I was gone and decided to have sex in the shower. It's been an hour and my bladder is about to burst. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 548

You deserved it 3 266

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Same thing different taste

By Anon - 25/08/2015 10:10 - New Zealand - Auckland

Today, I took a phone call in the bathroom, since the rest of the house was too noisy. I sat down on the toilet and waited while they put me on hold. After a while, I must have forgotten the lid was down and my pants were still on, because I started peeing myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 645

You deserved it 9 145

Lock your doors

By Anonymous - 27/05/2019 00:14

Today, I was touching myself in my room. Just as I hit the climax, my mom walked in because she heard me making noises and thought I was having a nightmare. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 482

You deserved it 767

Just a prank, bro

By sarah - 28/03/2021 20:00

Today, my parents wouldn't stop making fun of my shy bladder by camping out in front of the bathroom door while I’m trying to pee. As a result, I haven’t peed in 10 hours and my bladder is going to explode. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 027

You deserved it 174

Sprinkler

By shelly - This FML is from back in 2012 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I was locked out of my house and had to pee. I waited an hour for my boyfriend to come home. When I saw him pull into the driveway, I peed myself in excitement. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 964

You deserved it 7 578

By obtuse_ballsack - 04/06/2012 20:37 - Croatia - Zagreb

Today, I desperately needed to pee, but my mom was in the bathroom taking a shower, so I waited patiently until she finished. Just as I was about to go in, my half-naked dad rushed ahead, said "Going somewhere, son?" and shut the door on me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 724

You deserved it 2 761

By dammitall - 15/05/2009 18:49 - United States

Today, I was in a bathroom stall peeing. Shortly after, I heard a couple enter the bathroom, both extremely drunk. They then had sex standing up against the stall I was in, blocking my only exit. I had to sit, wait, and listen as both parties finished. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 434

You deserved it 4 885

By Peepants - 03/03/2016 23:03 - United States - Huntsville

Today, I really had to pee during one of my college lectures. I finally worked up the nerve to leave the room while he was lecturing, and ran frantically to the bathroom. Once in there, the urge intensified to the point I couldn't hold it. I peed my pants while standing in the bathroom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 082

You deserved it 4 737

Oh, hi Mark!

By Anonymous - 26/08/2012 05:46 - United States - Olympia

Today, I had to pee so bad that I ran downstairs with no glasses on and stumbled into the bathroom, half blind. I sat down on the toilet and realized just a little late that my older sister and her boyfriend were having sex in the bathtub. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 062

You deserved it 3 933

Peaky Bladders

By Anonymous - 16/06/2020 17:01

Today, I woke up at my girlfriend's house, dying to pee during a thunderstorm. Ran to the bathroom, but it was occupied. A huge thunderclap scared me pretty bad. When the door finally opened, my girlfriend's mom walked out, laughing. I realized the thunder scared me into peeing my pants. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 463

You deserved it 456

Night terrors

By Anonymous - 12/07/2020 17:01

Today, I woke up at night to go to the toilet. My Dad was doing his thing with the toilet door wide open. I saw, screamed at the top of my lungs and peed my pants in horror. Now my throat hurts and I'm too embarrassed to look at him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 375

You deserved it 546

illmatic2 16

Thursday 15 November 2012 16:24

I'd go piss outside or something.

DocBastard 38

Thursday 15 November 2012 16:25

And that's why it's great to be a man - The outside world is our urinal.

Comments

vbmg152 18

Thursday 15 November 2012 22:42

An hour?? What the heck is going on in there? You sure they're not dead?

Ukeee_X 19

Thursday 15 November 2012 22:53

He's like a stallion.

voveraite 7

Thursday 15 November 2012 22:55

I am shocked at the sense of entitlement of some people here. Even if the shower is shared, it is still theirs, and they may have genuinely thought OP is asleep or gone. They have every right to make love in every corner of the house, as long as they are not toooo loud and behind closed doors. What is up with the rude knocking and yelling suggestions? Way to shame people for enjoying each other's company even after several years, as if it is something shameful that should be done 100% inconspicuously. The gentlemanish / ladylike thing to do is to wait and keep being quiet, not to try to embarass them! How would you like it if/when your parents act like that when you bring a SO over?! Thumb down ahead! :)

israelnotjacob 20

Sunday 18 November 2012 7:36

Yeah if they're a married couple in their own house they absolutely have the right to have sex in pretty much any part of the house (I probably wouldn't in my kids' rooms, but that's it) if nobody else is home. Now yeah if they were going to occupy the only bathroom in the house for an hour they should have made absolutely sure nobody else was there, but yeah otherwise I don't think they did anything wrong. It is nice that they clearly are still crazy about each other. Some married couples barely even make time for sex these days.

israelnotjacob 20

Sunday 18 November 2012 7:38

Oh, and the OP deserves it if for no other reason that calling the bathroom "the loo".

capodanno 4

Thursday 15 November 2012 22:55

Is anyone ales jealous that op's dad can go for an hour?

bethrocksya 9

Thursday 15 November 2012 23:46

I don't understand everyone with comments like this. Is there really no other man that can last for hours anymore?! I'm starting to feel special about my bf's sex drive and stamina!

KiddNYC1O 20

Thursday 15 November 2012 23:50

Pee in an empty bottle. I hope your aim is good.

clairedycat124 3

Friday 16 November 2012 1:53

It's a girl.....

KiddNYC1O 20

Friday 16 November 2012 3:06

Thank you, I know....

manaallovesfmls 19

Thursday 15 November 2012 23:59

Do you only have one bathroom?

KiddNYC1O 20

Friday 16 November 2012 0:34

Yes, show off. As with many other families.

adogatemypetduck 4

Friday 16 November 2012 0:24

I think it's sweet that your parents are still that impulsive and playful. If they're having sex in the shower after all these years then they're not getting a divorce anytime soon. Plus they wouldn't be cranky and frustrated from lack of sex. Try to look on the bright side and hope that one day you have the same happiness with your spouse.