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By Anonyme - This FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff - Switzerland

Today, my girlfriend bought several packs of bottled water, even though we have pure mountain water on tap. She did this because the pile-up of unwashed dishes in the sink makes it virtually impossible to slide a glass under the tap. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 589

You deserved it 47 182

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Same thing different taste

Tasty

By Anonymous - 28/12/2020 05:01

Today, despite having the choice of several bowls of clean water in the house, as well as puddles and ponds outside, my cat was drinking out of a pot I was soaking in the sink. She doesn’t seem to mind the taste of dish soap. FML

I agree, your life sucks 719

You deserved it 115

You can't moan, can you?

By She does this for everything - 13/09/2024 07:00 - United States

Today, my wife asked for water, complaining about being thirsty. I got off the couch, walked two rooms over, got a jug of water from the fridge, and came back. She spent the entire time ranting about how thirsty she was, and when I handed her the water, she set it down and continued to complain. FML

I agree, your life sucks 446

You deserved it 89

**** you, Susan

By Anonymous - 04/12/2022 10:00

Today, I washed all the dishes that had been piling in the sink over the week, and set them in the drying rack before I left for school. I came home to see that my dad’s girlfriend had put them back into the sink, along with her dirty dishes. She told me to re-wash them. Why? “They didn’t smell clean.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 960

You deserved it 124

Keep it clean

By germy germs - 01/07/2021 19:01 - United States

Today, my wife bitched at me for not washing my hands before handling the dishes. The dirty dishes. That were sitting in a sink of hot soapy water. According to her, the dirt from my hands was gonna make the dirty dishes even dirtier. Huh? FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 093

You deserved it 249

By youredisgusting - 03/10/2014 07:00 - United States - Merced

Today, my roommate yelled at me yet again for using the dishwasher because it's "unsanitary." This is all while a mountain of her dishes were going mouldy in the sink. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 072

You deserved it 2 731

Biohazard

By Ugh - 13/09/2024 14:00 - United States - Richmond

Today, I watched as my girlfriend washed the last of the dishes with a dishcloth, then used that same dishcloth to wipe down the counters. I now understand why we always have bugs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 302

You deserved it 236

By Michelle - 17/10/2013 11:51 - Australia - Richmond

Today, my boyfriend told me that I have the bad habit of not doing the dishes before he has his daily piss in the sink. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 762

You deserved it 5 623

Morning pick-me-up

By Anonymous - 30/01/2011 05:05 - United States

Today, upon waking up, I took a sip on what I thought was a cup of water on my nightstand. I quickly discovered it was my roommate's cup of used mouthwash which she was too lazy to throw out the night before. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 978

You deserved it 8 669

One rule for thee…

By logic - This FML is from back in 2016 but it's good stuff - United Kingdom

Today, I was asked by my live-in landlord not to put too much water in the kettle because it made the utility bills too high. This is the same woman who takes daily baths. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 749

You deserved it 2 296

By LonelyShowers - 04/07/2012 05:36 - United States - Mission Hills

Today, my boyfriend pointed out that the water bill is getting kind of high. I suggested that we shower together to save water. He said he'd rather deal with the high water bill. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 177

You deserved it 4 076

xXSweetNightmare 0

Saturday 18 June 2011 5:16

I think it's time to do some dishes. Plain and simple.

Crlnprz 11

Saturday 18 June 2011 5:16

lazzy

Comments

TalkinSmack 6

Saturday 18 June 2011 5:40

wASH YOUR DISHES! that's disgusting

UnfOrg1ven 1

Saturday 18 June 2011 5:41

just wash the dishes and get your pure mountain tap water back :D

Iamnotmyself 17

Saturday 18 June 2011 5:42

And so it was foretold by the ancient wizards and elders Captain Obvious has struck again! Thank you for your thoughtful insight!

xXshadowrollerXx 6

Saturday 18 June 2011 5:44

If she is paying for the bottled water, what are you complaining about? Hell, no work for you! And what exactly is pure mountain water?

demonspeed 0

Saturday 18 June 2011 5:44

it's a battle of wills my man. don't give in! or do because thats kinda gross...

shannon1029 4

Saturday 18 June 2011 5:44

your making your girlfriend waste her money because you won't do the dishes? smh...

snippyxD 7

Saturday 18 June 2011 5:45

get off yer arse and do the dishes. dude how lazy can someone be? and the fact that your girl doesn't do them just states the point.. doooo it! lolz

Blacksmokehick 0

Saturday 18 June 2011 5:47

put the bitch in er place. The Kitchen.

Bikrbum 6

Saturday 18 June 2011 5:47

Geez wash the damn dishes. That is lazy!!

grymdylan 1

Saturday 18 June 2011 5:47

Sounds like you're saying "Woman's job to clean. And if she won't do it, the house stays dirty." ... Sexist Scum ;)

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The Top

Today, at work at an OB office, I heard a ruckus in the hallway before a very large woman burst into my room and tried to attack my very pregnant patient. Crazy lady is the wife of the pregnant lady’s baby daddy, who is nowhere to be found. I don’t get paid enough for this shit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 569

You deserved it 71

Today, I found out my girlfriend of 3 years has been cheating on me with more guys than I can count on one hand. I'm not sure what's worse, realizing this only after she's moved in, realizing two of the guys were my close friends, or realizing I'd given up my dream career for this. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 224

You deserved it 336

The Top

Today, my mother told me how long it took for her to have me. Not how long she carried me in her womb - how long it took her and my dad to have sex. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 058

You deserved it 3 035

Today, I realised that when I asked my girlfriend four months ago if was she on the pill, she thought I meant hay fever tablets. I'm going to be a father. FML

I agree, your life sucks 63 560

You deserved it 30 427

Today, my sister made a comment about my small boobs. I told her I'm actually a C cup, and she told me she "can't even C them". I just got roasted with a fucking pun. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 716

You deserved it 1 335

Today, I was driving home from an airport. On the way home, I got a flat tire. Once I was outside the car I realized that I had accidentally locked the car with the keys inside. I was in the middle of nowhere 20 miles from anywhere and couldn't call for help since my phone was in the car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 731

You deserved it 6 765

Today, while jogging in the park, a confused elderly gentleman asked me for directions, so I told him how to get to where he needed to go. He paused for a long moment, then asked me if he could eat me out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 377

You deserved it 2 245

Today, I spent a good deal of my afternoon preparing a nice dinner for my girlfriend. When I finally served the meal, I proudly presented her with a beautifully arranged plate of salmon. She looked at it and said, “You know I’m allergic to fish, right?” We had cereal for dinner instead. FML

I agree, your life sucks 167

You deserved it 729

Same thing different taste

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