Miscellaneous: Go out please!

Go out please!

By night_fox88 - 27/01/2020 05:00 - United States - Camden

Today, I woke up to my overly religious grandmother trying to shove salt down my throat yelling "DEMON BE GONE!". Why? I didn't wear the cross neckless she bought me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 183

You deserved it 228

When Christmas Ends Badly…
Rather than debating politics with Uncle Roger for the umpteenth time, share the best Christmas FMLs to finally have a good family meal! More…

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Same thing different taste

By ygma - 01/12/2015 16:39 - United States - Mansfield

Today, my extremely religious grandmother disowned me for watching Supernatural. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 443

You deserved it 2 763

Quality family time

By really mature, GRAN - 25/12/2012 20:59 - United States - El Macero

Today, my psycho grandma yelled at me for being an "immature brat" by not offering to wash the dishes after dinner. I reminded her that when I offered last time, she raged at me for being "condescending." She responded by faking a heart attack and getting me indefinitely grounded. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 779

You deserved it 3 078

By Anonymous - 14/12/2017 01:30

Today, a stranger yelled, "Non-believers shouldn't wear these!" He then took my rosary and ran off. It belonged to my dead brother. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 426

You deserved it 324

By raz - 02/10/2012 00:11 - United States - Fargo

Today, a woman stopped me and started chewing me out for wearing a pentagram necklace. I explained to her that is wasn't a pentagram, it was a Star of David. She continued chewing me out because apparently that still means I hate Jesus. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 550

You deserved it 2 637

By Anonymous - 23/03/2014 16:59 - Egypt

Today, my non-English-speaking grandma bought me a new t-shirt. It would've been sweet if it didn't have the word "bondage" written on the back in pretty, bold letters. I had no choice but to wear it while we went shopping. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 166

You deserved it 3 711

"Tubular Bells" by Mike Oldfield starts playing…

By Sodapop40 - 21/06/2020 05:05

Today, my mom admitted to me that, when I was a baby, my grandmother kidnapped me and took me to the priest to perform an exorcism, because she swore I was the "spawn of Satan." FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 578

You deserved it 128

Spirits, awake!

By liza - 29/03/2021 16:59

Today, since my alarm didn’t go off at 7 a.m., I awoke to my mother attempting to perform Necromancy on me “as a joke.” She wore a black robe and everything. FML

I agree, your life sucks 814

You deserved it 215

Why so serious?

By DwarfFrog - 18/06/2012 11:38 - United States

Today, my grandmother threatened to kill herself with a banana. She then got angry with me when I didn't attempt to get the banana away from her. My mom punished me because I didn't take the situation seriously enough. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 443

You deserved it 3 390

By Bad Child? - 08/04/2017 16:00

Today, as I was brushing my teeth, I heard my mum praying to God to help her "get rid of such a stupid child". I have no idea what I've done wrong, and she's refused to talk to me all day. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 814

You deserved it 433

By Anonymous - 05/03/2018 01:30

Today, my insanely religious 60-year-old neighbor screamed at me when I left my home to go to work. I was wearing jeans and that’s apparently improper for a female adult. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 522

You deserved it 319

jriley4u 17

Monday 27 January 2020 8:34

Neckless = no neck Necklace= jewelry worn around the neck

RebeccaMcQ 15

Monday 27 January 2020 7:42

Go back to school pls

Comments

RichardPencil 30

Monday 27 January 2020 7:01

Salt? That's no good for demonic possession. Tell your idiot grandmother to watch "The Exorcist" to know what the **** to do!

RebeccaMcQ 15

Monday 27 January 2020 7:42

Go back to school pls

jriley4u 17

Monday 27 January 2020 8:34

Neckless = no neck Necklace= jewelry worn around the neck

Mungolikecandy 19

Monday 27 January 2020 10:43

It sounds like she may have some form of mental disorder such as hyperreligiousity if such a small act can trigger such a response.

Cody Vertigo Bonthoux 15

Monday 27 January 2020 12:14

time for gam gam to go to a mental facility

mfranks19891989 10

Monday 27 January 2020 13:00

What did you do? Your grandmother is either super religious or has been watching to much supernatural.

Elisabetha Aarron 18

Friday 11 September 2020 21:09

Did you even read the FML before commenting??

bl3ur0z3 17

Monday 27 January 2020 14:28

The bigger crime is your spelling of necklace.

Vern Ehlers 5

Monday 27 January 2020 15:04

Have her arrested and charged with assault.

ThrottleJockey 35

Tuesday 28 January 2020 21:07

Don't you mean assalt?

ojosRojos 28

Tuesday 28 January 2020 14:22

“Neckless” lmao

BurnInDemonFire 34

Wednesday 29 January 2020 2:19

Have the fruitcake committed.

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The Top

Today, I had a mental breakdown. Many things have been going completely wrong in my life, and I finally decided to let my boyfriend know about it. After about an hour of explaining and pouring my heart out, his response was, "I think we were better off as friends." FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 336

You deserved it 5 516

Today, I walked in on my mother-in-law teaching my 11 year-old daughter how to purge herself using a toothbrush. Her logic is that, “If she gets fat, she’ll never get a boyfriend.” She sees nothing wrong, and bitched at me for messing with her future. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 299

You deserved it 136

The Top

Today, I found out that my husband wants to leave me. I got the message loud and clear when his girlfriend forwarded me screenshots of all their texts. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 144

You deserved it 99

Today, the guy I've been seeing decided to "test the theory" that I can't drink alcohol due to a liver condition by mixing some into my drinks. He then complained that my ceaseless vomiting made his bathroom smell bad, and only took me to hospital when I started having a seizure. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 058

You deserved it 355

Today, a package has been sitting at the post office for two weeks, with a status update of "Arriving Late." I've finally been told the package is most likely lost in a sorting bin, and won't arrive before Christmas. It was a custom-made, commissioned Christmas gift, that took two months to even complete, and can't be replaced. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 008

You deserved it 88

Today, I was in the middle of a wank when my home's back door, which is always locked, suddenly opened and someone walked in. I’m not sure who was more surprised: me or the new maintenance guy who saw me wanking. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 334

You deserved it 641

Today, I went to my favorite drive-in burger joint for dinner. As I was nearing the end of my burger, I grabbed a cup from the cup holder that I thought was filled with soda. Instead, I got a mouthful of dip spit that a friend left in my car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 413

You deserved it 8 018

Today, months into supporting my mum with her part time cleaning job by cooking dinner for my large family after university, I found out that she doesn't actually have a job, she just leaves the house for a few hours because she doesn't want to cook dinner. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 380

You deserved it 2 807