Love: Good one, thanks

Good one, thanks

By MarkTheShark - 12/12/2009 05:23 - United States

Today, I left work to find a note on my windshield that read, "I think you're cute," with a phone number written down as well. I got super excited and immediately dialed. The phone was answered by a woman laughing hysterically. It was my Mom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 914

You deserved it 6 864

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Same thing different taste

New phone, who dis?

By Raleigh - 13/10/2024 16:00 - Canada - Sudbury

Today, I was in a store parking lot when I got a text from an unknown number saying, "I see you, I know what you did last summer, you wicked little shit." I freaked out and looked around in a panic. It turns out that it was my "hilarious" dad testing his new phone from across the parking lot. FML

I agree, your life sucks 370

You deserved it 121

By apparentlyunattractive - 07/06/2009 09:23 - United States

Today, someone left a note on my car, saying "You're gorgeous. Call me. #######." I called the number and they said they saw me in the store I was in, telling me "You were the ONLY attractive person in there." We decided to meet up. He walks over, I say hi, he says "I think I put my number on the wrong car." FML

I agree, your life sucks 61 061

You deserved it 7 463

Hey you

By pappy - 03/05/2019 13:00 - United States - Lees Summit

Today, my friend asked me if I flirted with any girls during our shift. I said, "No, not any I could think of." He then told me there was a note on my windshield that said, "Call me" with a phone number on it. After my shift, I went to my car excited and read the note. It was just a penis. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 962

You deserved it 317

By lonely - 05/02/2009 15:14 - United States

Today, my phone rang for the first time in four days. It was my mom. She dialed the wrong number. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 614

You deserved it 3 267

Thanks mom

By Anonymous - 27/01/2017 00:00

Today, I checked my inbox and realized I got an email from a potential employer, saying they were having trouble getting a hold of me by phone. They called while my mom was using my phone to look up directions to a place, and she answered, kindly hanging up when they asked for me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 674

You deserved it 487

Ignore! Ignore!

By Anonymous - 12/05/2023 22:00 - Canada - Windsor

Today, I was at a job interview when my phone started ringing. It was my mom, so I quickly hit "Ignore", which was probably for the best since she was obviously drunk. She left a voicemail in which she sang "Happy Birthday" to me. It's not my birthday. FML

I agree, your life sucks 763

You deserved it 129

Numb

By Anonymous - 12/03/2020 02:00 - United States

Today, I noticed that my mom had left the house without her cell phone. I called her phone to let her know she forgot it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 449

You deserved it 1 722

By wwasmer - 27/02/2009 17:43 - United States

Today, I hit a car while trying to answer a phone call from my mom. I quickly answered the phone and shouted "What!?". To which she replied, "I just had a bad feeling in my gut about you so I wanted to make sure you were ok." FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 875

You deserved it 16 940

By slukaa - 13/06/2009 07:10 - United States

Today, for the first time in over a year, my mother actually called me. I excitedly picked up the phone. All I heard was rustling; her purse dialed me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 720

You deserved it 3 281

By noway6000 - 03/03/2009 16:49 - United States

Today, my parents left for work before I had to leave for school and I decided to skip. I stayed by the phone, expecting the school to call so I could pose as my parent and excuse my absence. The phone rings and I pick up. It's my Mom, calling to leave my dad a message on the machine. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 569

You deserved it 94 767

Laelfy 0

Saturday 12 December 2009 13:28

Wouldnt you know your moms number??

MrMaD_fml 2

Saturday 12 December 2009 12:40

LMMFAO... ..now that's funny! My first favorite!

Comments

Joui_fml 11

Wednesday 11 July 2012 1:35

I think I like your mom. But I wouldn't want to be you. xD

madgrinchhatter 12

Sunday 17 February 2013 2:01

YDI for not recognizing your moms number.

masonsmither 11

Tuesday 30 April 2013 1:58

Learn your moms number.

rmack150 2

Thursday 6 June 2013 22:16

YDI, you didn't recognize your mom's phone number?

soonpy 9

Sunday 30 November 2014 23:45

Surely you would recognise your mums number :P

michiville 11

Friday 16 January 2015 9:28

That was funny as ****

Keywords

Miscellaneous Family DIY Cats Management Work Poopoo peepee Awkward Coworkers Relatable Frustration Am I overreacting? Capitalism Animals ADHD Dogs Transportation Love Dating Health Anxiety Technology Mental health Sleep Roommate Clumsy Noise AITA Confused Parents

The Top

Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex. Feeling goofy, I thought it’d be funny to try to reenact that horrible sex scene from the movie Showgirls. I threw my body back, but completely lost my balance and smashed my head on the headboard. I ended up with a bad concussion and a huge hospital bill. FML

I agree, your life sucks 839

You deserved it 2 156

Today, it is mine and my twin sister's birthday. We both wanted a day at the spa for our birthday. My sister got a gift certificate to the spa, while I got mouthwash and a $20 gift card to Target. My mom said it would cost too much to make me also pretty. FML

I agree, your life sucks 121 779

You deserved it 5 987

The Top

Today, I explained to my dad that I think I have a vaginal infection. I asked if he could take me to the doctor. He responded by saying, "Just shove some ice up there. It'll go away." FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 211

You deserved it 3 795

Today, I got dragged into playing doubles tennis. It was me and my wife against her parents. I wound up hitting the ball too hard. My mother-in-law, who has the reaction times of a comatose turtle, got nailed. Everyone's convinced I did it on purpose because of our mutual hatred of each other. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 280

You deserved it 2 419

Today, I went to the Walgreens by my house and bought 8 body wash soaps because my boyfriend needs that much for 3 days. I’ve done this so many times that the girls at the register know me, and my boyfriend, by name. They gave me a bunch of $5 off coupons because they felt so bad for me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 847

You deserved it 166

Today, I was feeling a little bored so I decided to go outside for once. Living in Florida is nice and all, except for the fact that right now I'm putting ice over two snake bites. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 843

You deserved it 1 171

Today, I called the company with whom I had a job interview last week, which I thought went great, but hadn't heard back from. One of the interviewers claimed that I tried to grope her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 274

You deserved it 3 090

Today, my friend fixed me up with a guy from her workplace. I'm painfully shy, so I really appreciated it and was looking forward to meeting him, since she described him as very sweet. Once the date got started, he continuously made fun of my speech impediment, until I finally left in tears. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 529

You deserved it 116