Sex, Awkward, Cute and Intimacy: Honky

Honky

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2015 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, while my boyfriend and I were getting intimate, I let out a moan that can only really be described as sounding like a clown car horn. He ended up laughing so hard that he couldn't continue. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 389

You deserved it 5 197

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Same thing different taste

Acting is hard work

By S. Dub - 10/04/2020 05:00

Today, my boyfriend told me that I needed to moan louder so that he knew I was enjoying it. Reluctantly, I put a little 'umph' into my moans during the next round. He pulled out and said, "It's just awkward now." FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 956

You deserved it 307

By Anonymous - 19/01/2016 11:03 - United Kingdom - London

Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend. It was all going great until he decided to try talking dirty. His idea of this was moaning loudly, "Just what the pussy ordered" as he entered me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 311

You deserved it 2 764

By Volume_control - 10/11/2009 14:41 - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I were having it off in his den, I screamed at the height of my climax, and from the family room came the roaring laughter of my boyfriend's brothers. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 849

You deserved it 31 405

Narcissism

By during - 19/05/2010 12:12 - United States

Today, while me and my boyfriend were having sex, he moaned out his own name. FML

I agree, your life sucks 56 455

You deserved it 7 334

By S…… - 09/01/2011 10:18 - Singapore

Today, my boyfriend and I had sex. He decided to make gun sound effects as he came. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 391

You deserved it 5 766

By Anonymous - 30/05/2009 14:19 - Australia

Today, I was having amazing sex with this guy I had been seeing for a while. It got really intense, so did my moans. Guys usually like when I moan, but he just put his hands over my mouth and told me to "shut up" because it sounded like "pig noises". FML

I agree, your life sucks 62 323

You deserved it 21 501

By Anonymous - 19/02/2013 08:35

Today, while I was in the shower, my boyfriend decided to join me. We were really getting into it and he attempted to lift me up. Not only did I let out a massive fart, he slipped and fell on top of me. He won't stop laughing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 735

You deserved it 10 359

By Anonymous - 28/05/2017 20:00

Today, my boyfriend and I were finally alone and things were starting to get intimate. I was on top of him trying to be sexy, when in my excitement I giggled and called him a "silly girl" by accident. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 868

You deserved it 1 789

By screamer - 02/09/2012 06:41 - United States - Paso Robles

Today, while having sex with my boyfriend, I was apparently really loud, because when we finished I heard his mom and grandma sarcastically imitating me outside. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 957

You deserved it 38 512

So sensual...

By Wellokthen - 17/02/2017 22:00 - United States

Today, things began to get hot and heavy between my boyfriend and me. Suddenly, in a deep, sexy voice, he whispered, "God help me for what I'm about to do." Thinking it was just an odd manner of dirty talk, I mumbled about liking it. He then farted very loudly. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 076

You deserved it 1 157

Welshite 39

Thursday 6 August 2015 0:10

The next step is finding out how many men can fit inside. You'll be a hit at the local circus.

mds9986 24

Thursday 6 August 2015 0:09

Stop clowning around and get serious.

Comments

Kevinmeowbeanz 22

Thursday 6 August 2015 3:47

That's hot

logank013 20

Thursday 6 August 2015 4:42

Do you belong in a circus? Or was your voice just gone?

raesos91 26

Thursday 6 August 2015 4:50

AHOOGA!

DA3Z 16

Thursday 6 August 2015 7:59

Being able to have funny moments during sex is a sign of a great relationship!

hateredblast 7

Friday 7 August 2015 11:43

Its kinda funny in a cute way. Cheer up!

br3lynn 6

Saturday 29 August 2015 20:52

I hope your joking

Keywords

Awkward Smells Love Miscellaneous Embarrassing Health Painful Animals Cats First Dates Christmas Work Social Media Music Grieving Anniversary Boredom Abuse Ironic Intimacy Am I overreacting? Alcohol Drunk AITA Transportation Parents Gun control Kids Language Noise

The Top

Today, I was enjoying the benefits of marriage with my new husband. We were changing positions when my joints started crackling and popping like my mother's did when I was a kid. My husband stopped, concerned about my possible pain... I'm 20 years-old and pop like an arthritic 50 year-old. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 618

You deserved it 3 896

Today, I decided to have sex with with my boyfriend. After we had finished, I jokingly said, "Who's going to sleep in the wet patch?" He got up and said, "You're optimistic, I'm not staying. Oh, and I'm dumping you, that performance was disappointing." It was my first time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 574

You deserved it 4 529

The Top

Today, I woke myself up by letting out a long fart. It wouldn't have been so bad if I hadn't fallen asleep while on jury duty. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 947

You deserved it 9 478

Today, I finally met the cute guy I've been seeing around town. Bad news is, I was drunk off my ass, and when he told me his name, I burst out laughing because it's the same as my puppy's. He did not take it well. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 337

You deserved it 37 333

Today, I've been stuck in a minimum wage job since I was 15. I'm now 22 and I have no idea where I'm going in life. FML

I agree, your life sucks 689

You deserved it 266

Today, I found out I have a job interview coming up. For the job I'm currently doing and have been for the last nine months. My manager told me not to expect too much. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 528

You deserved it 2 391

Have you watched episode 2 yet? Let us know if you had the same reaction!

I agree, your life sucks 444

You deserved it 165

Today, I found out that my new roommate likes to put candy on the floor, let ants crawl all over it, and eats it. Ants and all. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 684

You deserved it 954