I need some me time - FML

I need some me time

By Anonymous - 13/07/2020 23:04

Today, my fiancée decided to go on a 3-hour trip because she needed a break from the baby and me. I forgot to mention who she went with: her ex. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 947

You deserved it 153

Winter: Snow and Funny News
Snuggle up and laugh with our winter stories, where snow isn't the only thing sliding around! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

By Guntherdog - 27/06/2013 15:17 - United States

Today, my fiancée decided to go on a "vacation." Our wedding is tomorrow. FML

I agree, your life sucks 57 906

You deserved it 4 060

Told you so

By Anonymous - 19/06/2021 22:00

Today, my wife is leaving me for the guy she told me not to worry about, who is also her ex. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 098

You deserved it 119

By TCRII - 08/07/2019 12:00 - United States - Springfield

Today, it's the first day of our honeymoon. My bride just informed me that she invited her ex-husband to come, so he can spend time with the kids. He will be here in 4 hours. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 617

You deserved it 264

You fool

By Anonymous - 25/10/2024 12:00 - Germany - Hamburg

Today, my wife and I both spent a weekend away separately with our close friends. However, we ran into each other, unplanned, at the airport. She was with her girls and I was with my girlfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53

You deserved it 1 619

By thissucks - 20/06/2009 01:12 - United States

Today, my girlfriend of 2 months found out she was 4 months pregnant with her ex's baby. She told me I could leave her and she wouldn't blame me, but I decided to stay with her. She told me she loved me and then dumped me because she needed to be with her baby's daddy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 59 615

You deserved it 6 907

By jimmy_poison - 09/02/2015 00:19 - New Zealand - Hamilton

Today, my date bumped into her ex-husband, who decided to join us for the rest of the dinner. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 236

You deserved it 2 940

Force of habit, or just mean?

By leogs23 - 02/03/2021 20:01

Today, my fiancée’s siblings kept calling me by her ex-boyfriend’s name. FML

I agree, your life sucks 932

You deserved it 79

Secrecy

By Anonymous - 15/06/2021 11:01

Today, I went to spend some time with my family. Unbeknownst to me, while I was having quality time with my family, my boyfriend of a year and a half was packing up his belongings and going back to his estranged wife. FML

I agree, your life sucks 886

You deserved it 225

Trust

By Anonymous - 03/10/2020 15:02 - Iraq

Today, my fiancée a year left me, a week after she told me she’s still talking to her ex. Her excuse for not telling me about this? Because, “You’ll make it a big deal out of it.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 214

You deserved it 138

Disconnected

By Chrissy - 08/10/2024 20:00 - United States

Today, I was having a romantic dinner with my girlfriend when she said she had a confession. I expected something cute. Instead, she told me she’s been "reconnecting" with her ex for the past month... and wants to go back to him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 525

You deserved it 56

Next

Top comments

whyme203 15

Tuesday 14 July 2020 0:39

Take this from a guy who’s baby’s mom left me for her prison dwelling ex while I was working and she was a stay at home mom. Do not continue down that path. It’s not worth it. It may hurt to cut ties now but it is better to start the healing process now than wait to try and fix things only for it to end the same way. All you will get is more pain and possibly end up broke

tounces7 27

Monday 13 July 2020 23:42

Obviously, you need to reconsider marrying this selfish disloyal loser. Things don't really ever take an upturn if she needs a break from you before you've even gotten married yet.

Comments

tounces7 27

Monday 13 July 2020 23:42

Obviously, you need to reconsider marrying this selfish disloyal loser. Things don't really ever take an upturn if she needs a break from you before you've even gotten married yet.

genuinegoodguy 9

Monday 13 July 2020 23:44

You’re not really going to marry this person are you ? Are you a doormat?

whyme203 15

Tuesday 14 July 2020 0:39

Take this from a guy who’s baby’s mom left me for her prison dwelling ex while I was working and she was a stay at home mom. Do not continue down that path. It’s not worth it. It may hurt to cut ties now but it is better to start the healing process now than wait to try and fix things only for it to end the same way. All you will get is more pain and possibly end up broke

RichardPencil 30

Tuesday 14 July 2020 0:44

A three-hour tour, a three-hour tour.

TPH1979 18

Tuesday 14 July 2020 5:23

The weather started getting rough, the tiny ship was tossed

RichardPencil 30

Tuesday 14 July 2020 5:41

The OP is certainly not The Professor.

brenniman 10

Tuesday 14 July 2020 1:25

Sounds like the two timing ***** is getting serviced somewhere else, all while taking you for a complete fool and her useful idiot.

BurnInDemonFire 34

Tuesday 14 July 2020 3:36

Nope.

alex_jaguara 32

Tuesday 14 July 2020 9:57

Don't marry,dude. It's not worth it.

FinkiusMaximus 9

Tuesday 14 July 2020 19:56

🎵A three-hour tour

Dark_Lord_Mr_B 5

Wednesday 15 July 2020 0:20

Ditch her man. This isn't something you should tolerate.

ftpallday666 16

Wednesday 15 July 2020 2:43

Dump her

Keywords

Awkward Miscellaneous Embarrassing Work Sleep Dating Love Am I overreacting? Annoying Parents Health Mental health Furniture Kids Gross Friends Public freakouts Fight Cops Drugs Neighbours Medication Relatable Dogs Animals Teenagers Gamers Ironic Video games Job interview

The Top

Today, mid-sex, my wife told me to call her a nasty slut. I was kind of uncomfortable doing it, but I did it to make her horny. She started crying, because she didn’t realise how much it would hurt her feelings. Now I’m not sure if she’s mad at me or herself, but I’m scared either way. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 736

You deserved it 280

Today, I found one of those realistic, expensive sex dolls in my boyfriend's cupboard. I asked why on earth he had that and apparently it’s for all those filthy, violent sexual things he likes to do, but knows most women would never even agree to try. Um, WHAT? FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 248

You deserved it 529

The Top

Today, my long-distance boyfriend arrived, took off my bra and told my boobs, "I missed you guys", then took off my panties and said, "Hey buddy" to my vagina before saying he missed me to my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 002

You deserved it 6 732

Today, my grandma was arrested for throwing her cane at a man who she thought was mocking her walk. That man was my boyfriend's father, who limps because of his cerebral palsy. He refuses to drop the assault charges. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 844

You deserved it 652

Today, I approached my daughter and told her she needs to clean her room. Her response was, "Thank you Captain Obvious." She's 4. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 322

You deserved it 10 279

Today, I went to a market. I saw stall which had mainly animal furs and things like that. I found a rounded, furry pen and stroked my cheek with it. Wondering what it was, being so soft and oddly shaped, I checked the tag. It was kangaroo testicles. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 686

You deserved it 19 910

Today, I found out I'm pregnant. My boyfriend and I have been dying to have kids together. This would be an exciting moment if he wasn't deploying in June and will miss everything except the morning sickness. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 073

You deserved it 6 951

Today, while packing up my classroom, I had a sudden stinging pain in my finger. Since I live in Arizona, my first thought was a black widow or scorpion, but the ER doctor didn't believe me and said it's nothing. Tell that to my tingling swollen arm. It’s been 4 hours. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 819

You deserved it 225