Poopoo peepee and Kids: Lowkey

Lowkey

By Anonymous - 16/07/2009 19:04 - United States

Today, I took my daughter to the lake. She told me she had to go to the bathroom and I whispered to her, "Just pee in the lake, it's fine, but go in a little deeper." She went in the lake and then turned to me to yell, "MOM, IS THIS DEEP ENOUGH FOR ME TO PEE?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 380

You deserved it 62 642

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Same thing different taste

By seethroughpee - 06/05/2015 05:22 - Canada - Edmonton

Today, my 6-year-old daughter barged into the bathroom while I was peeing, inspected the toilet and said, "You're well hydrated, good job." FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 292

You deserved it 3 984

By shizzy09 - 13/04/2009 20:09 - United States

Today, I took my 4-year-old daughter to the local pool for swim lessons. As we walked onto the deck she turned to me and said "Mom, that lady has really big boobs!" The whole pool heard, even the man my daughter was referring to. FML

I agree, your life sucks 66 505

You deserved it 5 137

By Lexi - 20/11/2010 19:07 - Canada

Today, I took my two-year-old daughter swimming. While sitting in the hot tub, my daughter pointed to the elderly man sitting across from us and mumbled something. I couldn't understand her, so I asked her to repeat it. After two more attempts, she shouted, "MOM! He has big boobs!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 427

You deserved it 7 280

By Anonymous - 28/05/2013 23:01 - United States - El Paso

Today, while at the beach, my son needed to pee. I told him to pee in the ocean. He took off his pants and peed from the beach to the water. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 532

You deserved it 48 275

In my day…

By thanks dad - 01/08/2020 02:02

Today, we were slowly introducing my daughter to the pool to help her get over her terrible fear of water. My father-in-law scoffed, called us pussies, and tossed my daughter straight into the water. When I threw him out, he insisted he was just trying to teach her to swim "the right way." FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 226

You deserved it 285

By embarassed - 25/05/2009 04:43 - United States

Today, my mother came up to me at swim meet and shouted to me in the bleachers "If you have to go potty, go now because there is a long line!". I'm seventeen. FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 889

You deserved it 3 278

By obtuse_ballsack - 04/06/2012 20:37 - Croatia - Zagreb

Today, I desperately needed to pee, but my mom was in the bathroom taking a shower, so I waited patiently until she finished. Just as I was about to go in, my half-naked dad rushed ahead, said "Going somewhere, son?" and shut the door on me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 717

You deserved it 2 759

By sniper foxeh - 29/07/2018 01:30

Today, my younger sister and I were camping when, during the middle of the night, she asked me if I could take her to the toilets as she was scared. I told her to go by herself or go behind the tent. Thirty seconds later, she peed on me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 830

You deserved it 4 488

By Anonymous - 02/06/2019 12:03

Today, I told my mom I was going swimming with friends. She told me, in front of them, not to go into the deep end unless there was an adult around because I'm not old enough to swim on my own. I'm 19. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 982

You deserved it 203

Teaching moment

By poolboy - This FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I was working as a swim instructor for kids. Teaching them not to be afraid of the water, I put my face in the water and blew bubbles. I asked them to try it. All of them did, except for one. I went right to him and blew bubbles again. He then said to me, "But I just peed in that water." FML

I agree, your life sucks 94 629

You deserved it 9 387

twenty2182 0

Friday 17 July 2009 1:27

...and everyone swam away

bambi77 0

Friday 17 July 2009 1:31

by an anonymous man?

Comments

maddog_fml 0

Friday 17 July 2009 18:42

No FML, just funny. Haha! #77 & #78: haha, you are damn right! but ENGLISH PLEASE!

khatuba 0

Sunday 19 July 2009 7:06

for a second there i thought you spelled English wrong;)

maria12_fml 0

Friday 17 July 2009 20:44

I didnt read any of the comments so I don't know if I'm copying anyone. Anyway to the OP: ur kid said " mom is this deep enough to pee?!" well first of all it doesn't matter, I always pee in the ocean and I would in lakes too, 2nd of all you posted saying ur a mom but it says ur a MAN! Transvestite much?

xwtf_manx 0

Friday 17 July 2009 22:48

What a disgusting individual. What kind of a parent encourages their child to urinate in water other people are in? Hopefully someone will return the favor by pissing in your drinking water.

ichat21 9

Saturday 18 July 2009 0:27

I completely agree. That's just plain nasty.

acfem9 0

Saturday 18 July 2009 1:21

Hahahahaha

sthanu150 0

Saturday 18 July 2009 3:37

i love how bad parents post their bad parenting on the internet, like people are going to rush to their side with sympathy. i can't wait til your daughter gets a UTI when she thinks it's okay to just not wipe, or just pee your pants because nobody is around. idiot.

boogersyum 0

Saturday 18 July 2009 6:13

So you're a man and she called you ' mom ' ?!?!

maxizzy 0

Saturday 18 July 2009 8:53

Ew there's enough animal piss in the lake for people to be peeing in it too. I think the whole mom and man thing is another FML in its self XD

laffinatu 0

Saturday 18 July 2009 21:17

YDI for telling your daughter it was ok to pee in the lake. Other people swim there, including your daughter (who would essentially have to swim back through her own pee to get to shallow water). I hope she doesn't apply this logic of yours to swimming pools.

uberchicken 0

Sunday 19 July 2009 1:03

I'm pretty sure that's a mom. And your daughter's a smart one.

blondiee09 0

Sunday 19 July 2009 5:22

wow thats disgusting that you would tell her to pee in the lake. you totally deserved that. and second, why would your kid call you "mom" when your a man??? there is a mistake or something here