Love, Relatable, Anger issues, Relationship advice and Am I overreacting?: Mind reader - FML

Mind reader

By Anonymous - 03/10/2024 11:00

Today, my wife bitched me out 3 times in a row, for things that were not even my fault: for turning my Xbox on, even though I only nudged the button accidentally with my toe; opening a beer when it was actually a Pepsi for our son, and walking loudly when I "know she has a headache," which I didn’t. FML

I agree, your life sucks 286

You deserved it 81

Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves! More…

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Same thing different taste

Riled up

By Anonymous - 20/01/2024 23:00 - United Kingdom

Today, my wife blamed me for the washing machine breaking. When I told her it wasn’t me because I haven’t used it this week, she immediately changed direction and started blaming me for not doing enough around the house, which is utter bullshit. I know I do my share, I think she just wanted to fight. FML

I agree, your life sucks 573

You deserved it 136

Modern bonding

By Anonymous - 01/06/2022 22:00

Today, my wife is mad at me because she claims I don’t spend any time bonding with her son. It’s as though she refuses to understand that just because we are in different rooms, on separate PlayStations, doesn’t mean we’re not playing the same game, and talking through headphones for hours at a time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 102

You deserved it 222

By Nomoresandwish - 29/11/2009 08:55 - United States

Today, when I had a go at my husband for spending way too much time in front of the TV, he pointed the remote control at me while miming turning down the volume in order to make me shut up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 210

You deserved it 13 463

Yapping

By Mud - 27/05/2024 13:00 - United States

Today, my wife yet again started nagging me about a project I've been working on. With every single whiny word spewed from her yap, I could feel my excitement diminish, until it was replaced entirely with resentment and a craving for beer. FML

I agree, your life sucks 468

You deserved it 275

Marriage going well is it?

By Long sufferer - 21/02/2021 02:01

Today, at 5:30 a.m., my wife woke me to order milk for our business because she forgot to do so last night. She then chewed me out for doing it there and then, waking her up. I'm apparently useless, always complaining and in a bad mood about the most mundane things. What? FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 175

You deserved it 119

Irony level: High

By Anonymous - 15/07/2022 04:00

Today, my wife refuses to let me play my Xbox, except at the weekends, because it’s "a childish waste of time" and "we need to spend more time together", yet when we’re together she has no problem spending hours on games on her phone. No, she does not see the irony in this either. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 496

You deserved it 217

Peace and quiet

By Anonymous - 06/04/2023 18:00

Today, after a long and stressful week, all I wanted was some time to myself with a few beers and a good video game. My girlfriend apparently disliked this, because she started blasting Cardi B, ran the vacuum behind me, and poured my beer down the sink when I used the bathroom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 948

You deserved it 218

Man caver

By Anonymous - 04/05/2023 18:00

Today, my wife screamed, cried, called me lazy and a bad parent, and threatened to leave and take our four kids. All I did was ask for an hour to myself every day for some private time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 617

You deserved it 1 175

Misunderstanding

By Anonymous - 24/04/2013 18:49 - United States - Rice Lake

Today, my husband tried to annoy me by slurping on his almost-finished drink. I yelled at him to knock it off. Later, our daughter told her class that mommy and daddy had been fighting about his drinking during breakfast. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 508

You deserved it 6 566

Forget me not

By Anonymous - 05/06/2022 15:00 - United States - Gardena

Today, my wife is upset at me for having to remind her of her responsibilities. She dropped the ball several times in the past, and she hates that I remind her to prepare for upcoming deadlines. FML

I agree, your life sucks 730

You deserved it 211

Next

Top comments

JIMMY2CHAINZ_84 1

Thursday 3 October 2024 15:45

sounds like you two need some counseling or go your separate ways.

core01 30

Friday 4 October 2024 4:51

Your wife needs a vacation. Send her to deer camp for a week while you run the house and take care of the kids

Comments

JIMMY2CHAINZ_84 1

Thursday 3 October 2024 15:45

sounds like you two need some counseling or go your separate ways.

core01 30

Friday 4 October 2024 4:51

Your wife needs a vacation. Send her to deer camp for a week while you run the house and take care of the kids

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The Top

Today, after moving to a new house my life has fallen apart, paperwork lost, appointments missed, job offers rescinded, and now I know why. The postbox by my new house isn’t in use, so four months worth of the letters I've posted are sitting uncollected inside it. It even has a big "Not in use" sign on it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 117

You deserved it 529

Today, I picked up my daughter from daycare. As we were getting into the car, I strapped her into the car seat, but something felt off. I looked back and realized I had picked up the wrong kid. In my defense, she was wearing the same jacket as my daughter. FML

I agree, your life sucks 114

You deserved it 533

The Top

Today, I put my travel cup of coffee on the shelf behind me while getting a haircut. When I left, I picked up my coffee and cell phone. A block later, the barber had chased me down to get his cell phone back. Yep, I had two phones in my pocket. FML

I agree, your life sucks 522

You deserved it 282

Today, my friend called saying she was gathering all her girlfriends for a girl's night out. I was thrilled with the idea and started to think of something to wear. She then asked if I would mind watching her son. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 922

You deserved it 2 923

Today, nine hours into a ten-hour shift, I accidentally told a customer, "You're a problem!" instead of, "You're welcome!" or, "No problem!" She gave me a dirty look and hurried off before I could correct myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 530

You deserved it 265

Today, I accidentally stumbled on a method of getting my job done in about a third of the time, so my boss made it mandatory for all employees. Unfortunately, my coworkers now can't slack off pretending jobs take 2-3 hours, and their constant petty revenge bullying is driving me mad. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 303

You deserved it 952

Today, I was caught trying to use the employee bathroom at the back of the store when an employee asked if I worked there. I responded with, “Oh what? Are you a hall monitor? That’s what I thought!” but ended up bumping into a corner and my nose started bleeding. FML

I agree, your life sucks 141

You deserved it 1 627

Today, I went to a bookstore to get "The Grapes of Wrath". I have a problem with controlling the volume of my voice, so once at the counter, I accidentally said quite loudly, "WHERE ARE THE ANGRY GRAPES?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 279

You deserved it 13 432