Intimacy: Nailed it

Nailed it

By anon - 21/12/2013 14:13 - United States - Lehigh Acres

Today, my girlfriend and I were having sex. I guess she got bored because she started looking at her nails. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 131

You deserved it 12 913

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Same thing different taste

Honest

By fml1977 - 04/03/2010 06:43 - United States

Today, in the middle of having sex, my girlfriend stopped moaning. I asked what was wrong. She said, "I'm bored." FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 388

You deserved it 8 019

Snoozefest

By notsogood - 08/11/2013 20:02 - United States

Today, during sex, my girlfriend got so bored that she asked me to tell her a story. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 547

You deserved it 19 415

We all do it. Don't we?

By Anonymous - 30/08/2010 07:30 - United States

Today, I saw my girlfriend scratch her crotch and then sniff her fingers. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 072

You deserved it 13 763

Really into it

By ThePopeMan - 17/03/2009 17:42 - United States

Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend when she started moaning and breathing heavily. I thought she was getting hot and was about to cum. Unfortunetly, she soon said, "I'm bored, let's play a board game." She was sighing, not moaning. FML

I agree, your life sucks 69 170

You deserved it 23 126

By MyHeadHurts - 20/01/2012 10:42 - Ireland

Today, I got bored looking at porn. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 214

You deserved it 39 614

By Anonymous - 15/09/2017 06:00

Today, while fingering my girlfriend in the dark, I tried to be sexy and licked my fingers. After we turned the lights back on, we realized that her period had come early. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 599

You deserved it 2 149

By Fml - 12/04/2013 05:05 - United States - Lynn

Today, my girlfriend and I were having sex; I know that some women are great multitaskers, but I'm guessing it was a bad sign when she started to go over the shopping list. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 213

You deserved it 14 627

By PerfectBoyfriend - 07/06/2016 16:38 - Belgium - Reet

Today, my girlfriend got pissed because she thought she heard me masturbating in the bathroom. I was brushing my teeth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 404

You deserved it 1 915

Watcha doin'?

By DamnThatsHarsh - 16/10/2009 18:04 - United States

Today, my girlfriend and I were fooling around on camera. I was mostly naked and putting on a show for her, when I noticed that she was looking off to the side instead of where she normally looks when she's talking to me. She was playing solitaire on her computer. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 435

You deserved it 4 357

By stopinthenameoflove - 19/06/2014 14:37 - Ireland - Dublin

Today, my girlfriend thought it'd be witty to buy a miniature stop sign, and hold it up when she gets bored during sex. FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 093

You deserved it 15 459

young_weezy_fml 3

Saturday 21 December 2013 19:18

those french tips tho

SmittyJA24 26

Saturday 21 December 2013 19:18

... Yawn ....

Comments

Larsh 4

Sunday 22 December 2013 21:58

Get rough!!

jordzy 8

Monday 23 December 2013 1:29

Maybe you should dress up as something

8born8 18

Monday 23 December 2013 12:05

Oooohh... Right in the ego...

icepick23 12

Monday 23 December 2013 17:17

Who cares what she was doing?

JCal585 8

Tuesday 24 December 2013 4:23

You should get better at sex..

victorcaulfield 3

Wednesday 25 December 2013 8:38

Your doing it wrong. Get better and maybe she wouldn't be board.

Daydreamer4466 6

Monday 30 December 2013 13:45

Dude that sucks. You have to play with her flower while you are having fun.

yaeza 3

Sunday 12 January 2014 10:30

Start going harder?

Sarah214 1

Friday 24 January 2014 5:59

Ask her what she likes obviously. Or just get up and put your clothes on and leave. That's a bitch move that she did that. She's not a keeper.

GERxJAN 6

Monday 24 March 2014 12:31

doesnt matter - had sex

Keywords

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The Top

Today, I broke a world record on third-wheeling with my friend and his girlfriend. As we were driving back from the beach, I took a nap and woke up to my friend receiving head in the front seat. They knew I was awake, but they continued and finished. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 729

You deserved it 1 031

Today, I learned the meaning behind the phrase, "Love you long time". It's from the movie Full Metal Jacket, when a hooker comes in and says, "Me so horny, me love you long time." I've been saying this to my parents and people at school, having no idea what it really means for over 2 weeks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 791

You deserved it 22 740

The Top

Today, no matter how many times I've asked, my dumbass neighbor can't get into the habit of regularly picking up after her six dogs. Her backyard is covered in shit with probably just inches between each pile or log. This means the wind blows the smell of shit in the direction of my house. I can't open a window. FML

I agree, your life sucks 451

You deserved it 75

Today, I was cuddling with my boyfriend when I began dozing off. I was then awoken by an explosive fart. It was me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 770

You deserved it 5 533

Today, it took me a full ten minutes to finish on the toilet. I was babysitting at the time, and it took the kids those ten minutes to destroy the kitchen and shave the cat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 456

You deserved it 8 159

Today, my girlfriend told me that she's pregnant. She'd told me she was on birth control, so I asked her to show me. She had been sticking the pills up her vagina like a suppository. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 419

You deserved it 1 589

Today, I carved a pumpkin for Halloween. I thought it would be cool to carve my name, and have it shine through onto the wall behind it. I figured that if I carved my name backwards then it would show up correct on the wall. My name's Lana and now my wall says Anal. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 494

You deserved it 49 718

Today, I was walking through airport security when a guard began making lewd gestures at his crotch, while looking at me. I was outraged until I realized he was trying to tell me that my fly was down. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 610

You deserved it 41 652