Work, Poopoo peepee, Management and Awkward: Nature called

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Nature called

By Anonymous - 12/12/2024 08:00 - United States

Today, I yelled at one of my employees for trying to discreetly slip out of a meeting, and demanded he sit up front so I could make sure he stayed for the whole time. Three minutes later, he shat his pants. FML

I agree, your life sucks 71

You deserved it 1 400

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Same thing different taste

He who smelled it…

By Anonymous - 31/01/2015 15:08 - United States - Venus

Today, my boss let me sit in on a board meeting. It was awesome until the guy next to me let out a vile fart, then looked at me in disgust, causing the others to look at me in disgust too. When I told my boss what really happened, he told me to grow up and stop blaming the other guy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 066

You deserved it 2 708

Reluctant

By bruised - 15/08/2015 15:47 - United States - Jacksonville Beach

Today, I had to fire an employee due to his staggering incompetence. The moment I said the F-word, he started fake-coughing, then loudly humming, then went to his desk and pretended not to hear anything I was saying. It took 3 of us to drag him out of the building kicking and screaming. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 148

You deserved it 1 962

Fartmageddon.

By dusty bean - 18/11/2017 05:00

Today, I held in an explosive fart during a co-worker's rant and waited a few seconds after he left the room to release the Kraken. Forgetting something, he returned mid-fart. Before either of us could say anything, our boss came into the room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 728

You deserved it 607

Bad timing

By screwedupfuck - 27/03/2015 21:19 - United States - Lowell

Today, I was at a big meeting at work. The CEO was reaming the hell out of us for our recent poor profits, when I accidentally let rip a vile fart. I was then subjected to a 10 minute tirade of abuse for "trying to be a funny man", and told that whatever small chance I had for a promotion is now gone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 474

You deserved it 6 090

Am I a ghost to you?

By AJ. - 19/08/2021 14:01

Today, at work, I thought I’d sneak a wee fart out, but ended up shitting myself. I just left work without telling anyone, went home, showered, then went back to work. No one missed me being away for 2 hours. FML

I agree, your life sucks 893

You deserved it 354

By Anonymous - 23/05/2012 20:38 - United Kingdom - London

Today, I was to give a presentation to several of my company's senior employees. The moment I stood up, I accidentally let rip a monstrous fart that lasted a good two or three seconds. When I tried to utter an apology, I clammed up and let out a whiny grunt. They were not amused. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 899

You deserved it 5 194

By dck128 - 29/08/2011 22:05 - United States

Today, I was fired because a 10-year-old shat his pants and couldn't follow directions. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 635

You deserved it 3 082

By Anonymous - 20/09/2015 15:23

Today, I accidentally farted at a board meeting. My boss thought it came from the guy sitting next to me and gave him hell for being a pig. I was too mortified to say anything, even when the guy blamed it on me, which caused my boss to rage at him for lying and then to kick him out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 835

You deserved it 12 125

By Anonymous - 11/12/2009 18:11 - United States

Today, I was in a meeting at work. In the middle of our CEO's speech, I farted. Everyone heard including my boss, who looked over and said, "Do you have anything else you wanted to add?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 990

You deserved it 25 527

Office world is hell

By Anonymous - 11/07/2020 14:01

Today, at work I was sitting on the toilet and a coworker came in and yelled, “That sounded like a big one!” and wouldn't leave until I left came out of the stall. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 487

You deserved it 141

JasonThorn 20

Thursday 12 December 2024 15:32

Yeah, that FML isn't over for you, OP. Expect a little visit from HR and the words "hostile workplace" to be used.

Thaylok 17

Thursday 12 December 2024 16:07

Step 1 is to admit your are a meglomaniacial micromanager.

Comments

JasonThorn 20

Thursday 12 December 2024 15:32

Yeah, that FML isn't over for you, OP. Expect a little visit from HR and the words "hostile workplace" to be used.

smoochmysnoot 5

Thursday 12 December 2024 16:06

I’m glad I don’t work for you. Dick.

Thaylok 17

Thursday 12 December 2024 16:07

Step 1 is to admit your are a meglomaniacial micromanager.

Lost Reggie 21

Thursday 12 December 2024 16:18

He should have shat on your desk.

Hangryko 31

Thursday 12 December 2024 17:26

I hope he sues you and you get fired.

tiptoppc 19

Thursday 12 December 2024 19:18

And this is actually a suable offense in America. I’ve seen such a lawsuit happen in my state. OP, pack your bags. If you aren’t gone now, you soon will be, and should.