Dogs, Parents and Animals: Never forget

Never forget

By OhhhNooo - 14/03/2010 23:23 - United States

Today, my Dad told me that I was named after the dog he accidentally shot in the head as a teenager. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 876

You deserved it 2 437

The rhythm of the fight
Discover all the best anecdotes from the month of January, with or without snow, with or without you. More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

Good boy

By Johndoe - 30/10/2021 20:00

Today, my dad called my by the family dog's name, and stared at me blankly as if struggling to remember my name when I was annoyed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 983

You deserved it 159

By Jololol - 17/05/2013 09:25 - United States

Today, I found out I was named after the woman my dad used to stalk when he was in high school. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 201

You deserved it 3 333

By lawoman27 - 01/07/2009 04:08 - United States

Today, I found out I was named after the woman my dad was having an affair on my mom with. FML

I agree, your life sucks 65 946

You deserved it 2 768

By Anonymous - 21/05/2010 12:07 - United Kingdom

Today, I found out that I'm named after my dad's favourite drink. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 441

You deserved it 4 568

Alas, poor Doggo

By suchatwat - 09/10/2020 05:02

Today, I accidentally hit my dad in the eye with our dead dog's squeaky toy. He cried. FML

I agree, your life sucks 974

You deserved it 265

By Florida - 27/10/2010 18:46 - United States

Today, my husband informed me that his father adopted a dog. I replied "Cool," he then said, "She happens to have your name." I think my father in law is trying to send me a message. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 130

You deserved it 2 940

By IHopeYourDogsGetDiarrheaAndPoopOnYourBed - 20/12/2011 11:49 - Mauritius

Today, I heard someone calling my name. It was my neighbor. Turns out they named their dogs after my mother, my sister and me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 826

You deserved it 3 535

Helicopter parents

By Anonymous - 20/12/2021 20:00

Today, I got home to see that my dad had let himself in. He told me he'd caught a feral dog that somehow got into my house, but not to worry, he lured it back outside and it ran away. So yeah, my dad set loose the dog I literally just saved yesterday from being euthanised at our local dog pound. Thanks dad. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 428

You deserved it 138

By Anonymous - 30/08/2015 15:44 - United States

Today, while I was pulling weeds, my dad thought it would be absolutely hilarious to yell "Hey, son!" then unload his gun at me when I turned around. After I'd screamed like a bitch and pissed myself, he broke down into hysterical laughter and said he'd loaded the gun with blanks. Fuck you, dad. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 590

You deserved it 2 558

By ItGirl - 09/11/2014 02:36 - Sweden - Eskilstuna

Today, my dad got so drunk that he forgot my name. He started calling me "It". FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 527

You deserved it 3 367

BluPenguin 3

Monday 15 March 2010 9:18

What a twist! That news must have struck you like a bullet!

persianality 0

Monday 15 March 2010 9:25

was it Lassie?

Comments

lolpwnagelol 0

Monday 15 March 2010 10:28

I feel sorry for you fluffy...

red_handed 0

Monday 15 March 2010 10:30

If I had a child named for every animal I "accidentally" shot in the head.....

ninafea 0

Monday 15 March 2010 10:35

Agree

buttshapedfruit 0

Monday 15 March 2010 10:51

lmao well, what's your name?

cheap123 0

Monday 15 March 2010 11:00

What kind of gun was it?

KiwiBlam 4

Monday 15 March 2010 12:01

Haha Cheap123, are you the boyfriend from FML #9019177?

padlarf 14

Monday 15 March 2010 11:14

OP is Indiana Jones

jonny2x4 0

Monday 15 March 2010 13:41

Junior?

breezer_fml 0

Monday 15 March 2010 21:44

Haha, my first thought too ^^

Fminetoo 0

Monday 15 March 2010 11:25

Never go hunting with your dad. He may turn out to pull a "Dick Cheney" accident.... LMAO

quikwit1212 0

Monday 15 March 2010 20:56

Damn it! Beat me to it.

yourlifesfucked 0

Monday 15 March 2010 12:11

^^ troooooll! troll... on the website... thought you'd like to know...

Giorgio272 2

Monday 15 March 2010 13:06

just don't cross him or he might have to bring out the 22 again to put you down.

samothrace_fml 0

Monday 15 March 2010 13:09

I've always thought the name Tim Johnson was nice, assuming your Dad's name is Atticus...which is pretty baller.

mlipro 0

Tuesday 16 March 2010 4:35

Nice.

Keywords

Miscellaneous Clothes Relatable Shoes Cars Transportation Insurance Health Work Love Cheating Awkward Embarrassing Clumsy Food Animals Dating First Dates Bikes Dogs Cute Pranks Ironic Shopping Mistakes Texting Family Fight Birthday Drunk

The Top

Today, I was in a public restroom. The guy in the urinal next to me was making loud sounds of discomfort. I ignored him and finished up. I turned around to be greeted by his red swollen beehive of a crotch, and him asking, "Is my penis supposed to look like this?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 744

You deserved it 2 816

Today, at work at an OB office, I heard a ruckus in the hallway before a very large woman burst into my room and tried to attack my very pregnant patient. Crazy lady is the wife of the pregnant lady’s baby daddy, who is nowhere to be found. I don’t get paid enough for this shit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 507

You deserved it 64

The Top

Today, my husband told me I was lucky to have someone who would love me no matter what my vagina smelled like. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 650

You deserved it 22 988

Today, while ice-skating with my girlfriend, I tried to do what they do in the movies and make her gently fall into my arms. Instead she slipped, fell, and hit her head on the ice. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 773

You deserved it 41 769

Today, after working a double shift, I got home to total pandemonium. My dogs had crapped all over the house, my kitchen was soaking wet, etc. My mother, who just moved in with me, was sitting on the couch, saying she had no idea what happened. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 346

You deserved it 2 096

Today, during a text conversation with a girl I've been trying to get with, she complained about how crummy of a day she was having. I told her it couldn't be as bad as she thought, and she would probably get it over it soon. Then she told me she had found out her cousin had been murdered. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 176

You deserved it 13 395

Today, I wrote my phone number on a Post-it note and gave it to a cute girl at work. She immediately threw it away. In front of me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 468

You deserved it 1 023

Today, while I was showering, my 3 year-old son came to the bathroom and put on all my makeup. Once I got out of the shower, I got a camera I had and took a few adorable shots. Afterwards, I sent the images to all my friends and family. Then I realized the reflection on the mirror was me fully naked. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 957

You deserved it 93 493