Intimacy: Not a real doctor

Not a real doctor

By silencio - 24/05/2012 10:44 - Canada - Ch?teauguay

Today, my mom watched a Dr. Phil episode. She's now hysterical because she assumes me and my friends are involved in sex parties. All because a man on the TV said so. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 429

You deserved it 2 399

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Same thing different taste

By Shelbitchh - 28/07/2011 09:11 - United States

Today, my mom decided to take away my TV after noticing that I watch the show True Blood. Apparently, since I watch this, I must be "curious about sex." I'm 19. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 759

You deserved it 5 375

By yarhyun1 - 19/08/2012 16:00 - United States

Today, I realized just how messed up my life is, thanks to all the scare stories my wife sees on Dr Phil. She's now convinced that I'll start beating her someday. She's started taking martial arts classes, and threatens to use her skills every time I get even slightly frustrated with her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 335

You deserved it 2 548

Overreaction much?

By owngoalscored - 22/09/2018 22:00

Today, I was watching a movie that had a mild sex scene in it. My mother walked in just as that scene was starting and she flipped out. I'm now grounded. She's taken my TV and laptop out of my room and refuses to let me see my boyfriend because she's sure he's the cause of my "disgusting behaviour". FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 735

You deserved it 334

Noise complaint

By scarred - 27/07/2009 04:42 - United States

Today, I heard my parents having sex for the first time so I turned the TV up really loud to drown out the noise, and a minute or two later my mom comes downstairs in this skimpy nightgown to ask me why the TV was so loud and, seeing the horror on my face, kept asking what was wrong with me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 58 105

You deserved it 3 956

By Anonymous - 18/06/2009 07:17 - United States

Today, I saw myself in a 'girls gone wild' ad with another girl. So did my mom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 189

You deserved it 119 379

By misi - 22/06/2019 16:00

Today, my mother threw a fit because the psychologist she got me suggested I visit a psychiatrist. Apparently, it's my fault because I "choose" to be so "crazy". FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 733

You deserved it 131

One-upmanship championship

By Jan - 18/10/2013 06:13 - United States

Today, my mother topped someone's story of their child's problems by saying I'm on drugs. This resulted in people showing up to stage an intervention for me. She made the whole thing up and I've never used drugs, but no one believes me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 771

You deserved it 2 997

Thanks mom

By Anonymous - 14/02/2021 14:01 - Colombia

Today, my mom decided it was a good idea to remind me about my non-existent sex life while all the family was having dinner. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 042

You deserved it 109

By Anonymous - 25/02/2013 16:14 - United States

Today, my mom tried to convince my dad that I was a lesbian. Why? Because she was bored. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 684

You deserved it 3 886

Classic

By auraya1985 - 12/09/2015 21:34 - United Kingdom

Today, I got called into the school by my daughter's teacher. Apparently my daughter informed her class that over the weekend she spent her time with her daddy watching porn stars while her mummy was at work. It took a long time to convince her they were actually watching a TV show called "Pawn Stars". FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 354

You deserved it 1 891

I_Punch_Babies 7

Thursday 24 May 2012 15:56

if its on tv it must be true :-/

Meowingtons500 18

Thursday 24 May 2012 16:00

Oh boy, wait until she sees Maury.

Comments

millieee92 2

Thursday 24 May 2012 19:50

To the grammar nazi #118 criticising her, you incorrectly used the word "your" and "no" instead of not. Maybe you need to go to a grammar party...

dreamer9614 3

Thursday 24 May 2012 19:50

Dr. Phil is an idiot D-bag that needs to stop airing new shows. He also thinks that only soldiers get PTSD and that they're ticking time bomb killing machines once they have it. Among a lot of other VERY wrong 'facts' he preaches to those dumb enough to watch.

PinkyPie09 6

Thursday 24 May 2012 20:08

Ugh Doctor Phil. It's because of him that my mom and step-loser were convinced I was going out trying to get pregnant. They were already controlling before that, but things got way worse. All because of Doctor Phil.

97629762 3

Thursday 24 May 2012 20:48

Don't you mean my friends and I?

skulskinator 5

Thursday 24 May 2012 21:05

Tv never lies

ICastillo 24

Thursday 24 May 2012 21:07

So it's agreed my fellow FMLers Dr. Phil sucks donkey dong!!!

mollysticks 10

Thursday 24 May 2012 21:09

He's not even a real doctor.

Il_Maestro 6

Thursday 24 May 2012 21:10

I trust him. That mustache says he means business and demands respect. Why do we always listen to the men with mustaches? It hasn't really worked out...

noisebox 1

Thursday 24 May 2012 21:25

Dr. Phil is a bald headed retard, ( but who is laughing all the way to the bank). I heard has his team check out the guest to see if they are " good looking" enough to be on his show. He s a fat bastard who actually has a book about loosing weight with his fat butt on the cover....

heitwl 1

Thursday 24 May 2012 21:32

What is wrong with being bald?

FarscapeSDC 9

Thursday 24 May 2012 21:52

Why does anyone listen to Dr. Phil? He may be a PhD, meaning he is technically a doctor, but unlike psychiatrists who are actually medical doctors, a psychology degree doesn't mean you are qualified to offer advice. Plus, his PhD dissertation was on the most absurd subject, So I doubt the validity of his PhD (The dissertation was entitled "Rheumatoid arthritis: a psychological intervention." Really? who needs a psychological intervention for arthritis? they need drugs, physical therapy, or surgery.)