Not today, Satan

By Anonymous - 14/03/2022 07:00 - United States

Today, I briefly considered coming out to my parents when the topic of LGBTQ+ people came up in conversation, until my dad called them “socially deranged.” FML
I agree, your life sucks 1 074
You deserved it 284

Same thing different taste

Top comments

Only come out if your moved out or have somewhere safe to go, I came out and was raped to turn me straight, beaten and abused. Better to safely live a lie till you have alternative housing.

For what it's worth, I was brought up in a very homophobic home. I never thought about it, I just accepted it, and I know I made at least a few comments (not direct insults) in High School and when I got to college that I deeply regret. Then my best friend from high school needed to get drunk in order to have the courage to email me that he was gay, because he had heard at least one of those comments. A lifetime of being brought up in a homophobic household lasted approximately 10 seconds, at which point I was on the phone crying and apologizing and telling him it didn't matter. And that was the end of any homophobia for me. He was my best friend; I knew him. I knew that none of the things I had been taught to believe were true about him, so it was only a short, obvious step to conclude that they probably weren't true in general. I'd like to think that, at least in some cases, a parent would have the same experience: realizing that the assumptions they hold aren't true about their offspring, so the assumptions themselves are probably invalid. Of course, I know that this often isn't the case; I've read plenty of stories on reddit about people whose parents disowned them. My recollection is that in all of those cases (or maybe just almost all), it was religion that caused the extreme reaction. If your father's negative view of gay people isn't based on some deeply rooted religious belief, maybe he'll react better than you're imagining? I would be the last person on the planet to advise someone about the coming out process, but I did want to share my experience with you, since I doubt I'm the only person that's ever thought and reacted as I did.

Comments

Only come out if your moved out or have somewhere safe to go, I came out and was raped to turn me straight, beaten and abused. Better to safely live a lie till you have alternative housing.

For what it's worth, I was brought up in a very homophobic home. I never thought about it, I just accepted it, and I know I made at least a few comments (not direct insults) in High School and when I got to college that I deeply regret. Then my best friend from high school needed to get drunk in order to have the courage to email me that he was gay, because he had heard at least one of those comments. A lifetime of being brought up in a homophobic household lasted approximately 10 seconds, at which point I was on the phone crying and apologizing and telling him it didn't matter. And that was the end of any homophobia for me. He was my best friend; I knew him. I knew that none of the things I had been taught to believe were true about him, so it was only a short, obvious step to conclude that they probably weren't true in general. I'd like to think that, at least in some cases, a parent would have the same experience: realizing that the assumptions they hold aren't true about their offspring, so the assumptions themselves are probably invalid. Of course, I know that this often isn't the case; I've read plenty of stories on reddit about people whose parents disowned them. My recollection is that in all of those cases (or maybe just almost all), it was religion that caused the extreme reaction. If your father's negative view of gay people isn't based on some deeply rooted religious belief, maybe he'll react better than you're imagining? I would be the last person on the planet to advise someone about the coming out process, but I did want to share my experience with you, since I doubt I'm the only person that's ever thought and reacted as I did.