Miscellaneous: Please, think of my family…

I'd probably be more scared of the stapler than a gun.... A gun probably wouldn't be loaded and if it was they probably wouldn't shoot.... They would be more likely to staple you.

kesspeak 11

Friday 11 October 2013 5:05

....that's my stapler. I just want my stapler back. (Office space reference for those of you who suck at life)

sdroze1389 31

Wednesday 8 January 2014 1:15

getting hit by a stapler it's no joke. Still, it's not fatal no matter how hard you try

fuggotmuggot 14

Sunday 22 February 2015 20:36

What'd you do?

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The Top

Today, my mom texted me in the middle of my end of term math exam, saying it was extremely urgent and needed me to come home ASAP. While skipping my exam, I finally got home to find out my mom forgot what the emergency was. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 786

You deserved it 6 163

Today, I was sitting on the chair-lift on a ski trip. There was a shift in gears and the metal in the seat began to vibrate. My dad, sister, and step-mom were all on the lift with me, not feeling a thing. It's terribly awkward to converse with your family while you involuntarily orgasm. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 332

You deserved it 6 125

The Top

Today, I found out I have to give my father-in-law back the football tickets he gave me for my birthday. Why? His girlfriend decided she wanted to go. He didn't get me a different gift. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 404

You deserved it 2 491

Today, while having sex with my boyfriend, he started pretending he was a dog. This included barking, licking my face, and scratching his ears. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 445

You deserved it 6 707

Today, my boss finally pronounced my name correctly. My name was then followed by the words, "You're fired." FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 786

You deserved it 2 580

Today, I posted bail for my mom from jail. She did a hit and run, and then resisted arrest. When I asked why she didn’t stay at the scene, she unapologetically said, “I was gonna be late to church.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 999

You deserved it 119

Today, I found a Google search for "erectile dysfunction" in my browser search history, along with pages about treatments for it. I'm a woman, and I live alone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 238

You deserved it 3 828

Today, I overhead my mother's request to be spanked harder by my dad. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 006

You deserved it 2 993