Dogs and Love: Protips - FML

Protips

By notagoodsign - This FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff - Netherlands

Today, while watching Animal Planet, I realised my boyfriend uses the Dog Whisperer techniques on me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 124

You deserved it 9 519

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Top comments

illmatic2 16

Monday 28 February 2011 16:08

That's what happens when you're a bitch.

DocBastard 38

Monday 28 February 2011 16:28

OP: I love you! Boyfriend: *scratches OP's ears* Such a good girl! OP: What the **** are you doing? Boyfriend: *hits OP's nose with newspaper* Bad girl! Bad girl! OP: Ooh yes, tell me I'm a bad girl!

Comments

blonde_girrl 6

Friday 16 May 2014 6:30

Oh my gosh that is so demeaning!! Women are not dogs! You are not a dog. If he doesn't respect you, then he needs to be tought some manners! You are beautiful and he means zero if he can't even respect you. He is calling you a dog? Well he should be ashamed..

firelava 12

Saturday 9 August 2014 21:41

Does it work?

kutkutkut 8

Monday 27 October 2014 3:17

I do this with my wife too, she's an animal.

theroxors19 12

Tuesday 4 August 2015 14:55

hey, you ain't nothin but mammals so do like you do on discovery channel

Keywords

Love Surprise Cute Awkward My ex Texting Intimacy Sex Wanker Mental health Health Insomnia Sleep Food Cooking Kids Weekend Parents Pranks Annoying Miscellaneous Work Embarrassing Technology Coworkers Zoom Argument Roommate Pizza Animals

The Top

Today, I was sifting through my parents old home movies. I put in one and was horrified to see my parents having sex. I immediately ejected the tape and looked at the label. It said "Bermuda, 1989." They've told me I was conceived in Bermuda around that time. I've seen my own conception. FML

I agree, your life sucks 194 753

You deserved it 37 492

Today, I locked myself out of my apartment. But it’s 2024, so I have a smart lock I can unlock through an app on my phone. Except I also left my phone inside. The worst part? I had to ask my neighbor to call my mom so she could unlock my apartment from her phone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 153

You deserved it 375

The Top

Today, my older sister dragged us to a restaurant that charged us $80 a piece for 8 mouthfuls of food. She does this all the time. When our youngest sister defended her, it removed all doubt that our parents still pay her bills. FML

I agree, your life sucks 846

You deserved it 144

Today, I found some .pdf files on my wife's computer. They were forms that had been filled out except for the date and the "reason" section. They were divorce papers. When confronted about it she said, "Well, if you piss me off really bad, I want to write down why before I calm down." FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 839

You deserved it 4 172

Today, when I tried to play my new Switch, my girlfriend yelled at me to "put down the damn video games." I've barely had five minutes to use this thing without her bitching at me. The worst part? She gave it to me, for Christmas. FML

I agree, your life sucks 651

You deserved it 143

Today, at work, a customer I've never met before congratulated me on my gender transition and told me how brave I was. I'm not transgender, I'm just short and baby-faced. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 865

You deserved it 228

Today, I decided to watch a movie I hadn't seen before to bring my spirits up, as I've been feeling down lately. How did the movie end? Everybody died. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 178

You deserved it 8 408

Today, I rolled over a curb and bent one of the signs that read "Please Park Here After Your Road Test," at the DMV, because my foot slipped off the brake just before I put the car in park, which would've ended my Test. The first words out of the examiner's mouth were, "Well you would've passed." FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 111

You deserved it 31 822