Health: Road to nowhere

Road to nowhere

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2016 but it's good stuff

Today, what was meant to be a fun hour-long paddle with a friend turned into a 5-hour ordeal involving a coast guard helicopter, an ambulance, a hospital visit, and a ruined canoe. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 575

You deserved it 1 529

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Family meals that turn absurd, because Thanksgiving is also about laughing at little disasters. More…

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Top comments

jeff_zz 13

Sunday 24 July 2016 7:01

This is one of those fmls that could really use some elaboration from op.

gunner1579 25

Sunday 24 July 2016 7:00

I hope you're all okay!

Comments

winstonchap213 5

Monday 25 July 2016 1:17

that escalated quickly

tomvertigo 17

Monday 25 July 2016 4:46

I... what? How?

SauceySarah 30

Monday 25 July 2016 9:38

I need to know what happened.

cj89898 24

Tuesday 26 July 2016 10:43

Dang that really sucks! Your canoe got ruined! No, but seriously I hope you're all okay.

pancakessdsjsn 17

Tuesday 26 July 2016 11:04

Please elaborate.

Phoenix157 3

Thursday 28 July 2016 8:10

what happened

Keywords

Awkward Miscellaneous Embarrassing Work Sleep Dating Love Am I overreacting? Annoying Parents Health Mental health Furniture Kids Gross Friends Public freakouts Fight Cops Drugs Neighbours Medication Relatable Teenagers Dogs Animals Gamers Ironic Video games Zoom

The Top

Today, my best friend and I were playing Call of Duty when he said he had to go to the bathroom. Curious, I checked his phone. A text message read, "Tell your friend you're going to the bathroom and come eat. Pizza is here" from his dad. Apparently, I'm not good enough to feed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 060

You deserved it 8 155

Today, at work, I handed an old man his drink, and our fingers accidentally brushed. He gave me a creepy wink and a smile, but I ignored it. He's now been sitting in the store for two hours watching me. Only four hours to go until I get off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 829

You deserved it 2 483

The Top

Today, my mom tried to burn my arm with a hot spatula, all because I got a tattoo against her wishes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 483

You deserved it 5 526

Today, I thought it would be cool to take a picture of the guy whose kids I’m babysitting's Tesla and post it on my Instagram, passing it off as mine. I learned to keep my profile private, because the guy found my pic and posted, "Actually that’s my car." FML

I agree, your life sucks 146

You deserved it 2 324

Today, I saw a sketchy looking person frustratingly trying to open a BMW in the parking lot where I work. I ran outside to confront him and call the cops. Turns out, not only was he the owner of that vehicle, but he was one of our company’s biggest donors. FML

I agree, your life sucks 326

You deserved it 1 333

Today, my friends decided it would be funny to give me a "hickey" with a vacuum cleaner while I was passed out drunk. Not only do I have to try and explain this to my girlfriend, but we're meeting her parents for lunch this afternoon. FML

I agree, your life sucks 59 062

You deserved it 22 457

Today, I found out the hard way that if you leave your sheets on the washing line too long, spiders will go and make their new home in them. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 874

You deserved it 2 106

Today, I come home to find that my dog has taken a dump on my bed. I quickly put on my house shoes to avoid possibly stepping on any other of his turds. I felt something squish all over my right foot. He also took a dump in my house shoe. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 557

You deserved it 4 902