She has a bright future in politics
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By j - 01/03/2011 06:26
Here's the question- Is anyone coming up to you confronting you, or are they complaining about her? Depending on the answer, you'll either need better friends, or this'll blow over.
If your other "friends" are true "friends," they'll know that your "friend" is lying about you. One way to know that a "friend" is a true one: You don't need to explain them with quotation marks.
kind of sounds like your friend is a narcissist and is projecting her own thoughts and feelings but claiming it's you.
This is common in grade school people realize it's easier to push people down than it is to actually better themselves. Once you get out of high-school people will be very aware of this behavior and it won't work anymore.
The best solution to this problem that I've ever seen is one that appeared in r/ProRevenge. When that "friend" isn't around, talk her up to your mutual friends. Gush about how nice she is to you, and what a good friend she is. Don't let on that you know she's slandering you. Obviously, this can't work if they already know that you know, due to how you learned it. But if they don't know, be unfailingly complimentary of that friend's behavior toward you. Your mutual friends will eventually learn not to trust her. If you can't do that because they know that you know about the slanders, the closest you can come (if you're good at lying) is to act like the "friend" told you the same things about some other friend. "Hey, Dana told me some disturbing things about Marge, like that she's a horrible racist. Do you think that's true? I don't know whether to believe it." Last idea: Prove that you are an ally. Don't tell anyone that you are, but simply demonstrate it. Wear shirts that show clear support for LGBT+ pride, BLM, etc. If you have a chance, volunteer with appropriate organizations. And make sure that you listen to oppressed people, follow their lead, and use your voice to amplify theirs rather than to speak for them. Good luck.
Kiss her. That will take care of one of those. Two, if she's not white.
Keywords
The best solution to this problem that I've ever seen is one that appeared in r/ProRevenge. When that "friend" isn't around, talk her up to your mutual friends. Gush about how nice she is to you, and what a good friend she is. Don't let on that you know she's slandering you. Obviously, this can't work if they already know that you know, due to how you learned it. But if they don't know, be unfailingly complimentary of that friend's behavior toward you. Your mutual friends will eventually learn not to trust her. If you can't do that because they know that you know about the slanders, the closest you can come (if you're good at lying) is to act like the "friend" told you the same things about some other friend. "Hey, Dana told me some disturbing things about Marge, like that she's a horrible racist. Do you think that's true? I don't know whether to believe it." Last idea: Prove that you are an ally. Don't tell anyone that you are, but simply demonstrate it. Wear shirts that show clear support for LGBT+ pride, BLM, etc. If you have a chance, volunteer with appropriate organizations. And make sure that you listen to oppressed people, follow their lead, and use your voice to amplify theirs rather than to speak for them. Good luck.
This is common in grade school people realize it's easier to push people down than it is to actually better themselves. Once you get out of high-school people will be very aware of this behavior and it won't work anymore.