Love: Simp

Simp

By Anonymous - 23/06/2010 23:06 - United States

Today, it was the girl of my dreams' birthday. She already knows I am totally in love with her. So for her birthday I decided to buy her a $60 dollar bottle of rum for her and her friends to have fun with. She picked it up from my house with her new boyfriend waiting in the car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 439

You deserved it 39 540

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Same thing different taste

By 1fungi - 07/12/2010 05:25

Today, it's my 26th birthday. My girlfriend gave me a matchbox car, a glow necklace, and a squirt gun. For her birthday, I bought her a new dress, rented a limo, and took her around to bar hop with her friends. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 011

You deserved it 5 442

By holla1787 - 04/12/2009 03:11 - United States

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me. Her birthday is tomorrow so she sent her new boyfriend to pick up her birthday present. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 545

You deserved it 2 820

Inappropriate crush

By Anonymous - 14/06/2020 17:00

Today, a week after my 10-year anniversary, I realized I've somehow been roped into hosting my husband's crush's birthday party with all their friends. My gift to myself was a $60 bottle of whiskey that won't arrive in time to help me with my debilitating social anxiety. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 454

You deserved it 358

How can I make this about me?

By Anonymous - 04/02/2022 18:01

Today, it's my birthday. My wife took me to my favorite restaurant for dinner. She made me pay for my birthday dinner, along with hers. She also got me a gift card to HER favorite store. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 114

You deserved it 164

Thanks, I hate it

By Anonymous - 11/12/2009 16:52 - United States

Today, it's my birthday and my friends and I went to our favorite pub to celebrate. As I'm a little broke at the moment, they all offered to buy me birthday drinks. Which I later learned meant that they would order them for me and bring them to the table, but put everything on my tab. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 547

You deserved it 2 931

By TheAngryBird - 28/06/2012 04:51 - Canada - Grimsby

Today, my girlfriend gave herself a graduation gift: a new boyfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 413

You deserved it 2 716

By Mazzam - 19/11/2008 11:33 - France

Today, it's my birthday. My girlfriend gave me the present she'd bought for me. I said, joking, "I hope it's not a tie!" It was a tie. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 279

You deserved it 18 565

By bbns - 14/01/2009 11:57 - Germany

Today, I organized a party, invited a girl I've been secretly in love with for years, as well as a friend of mine who brought along an unknown mate of his. The party was fine, although the unknown mate threw up all over the floor. Now, the girl is dating that unknown mate and is in love with him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 350

You deserved it 2 799

By Anonymous - 24/06/2011 23:36 - United Kingdom

Today, it's my birthday. My boyfriend told me he was too busy studying for finals, but that he'd take me out another day instead. He later drunk-dialled me from a party demanding a lift back home. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 135

You deserved it 4 243

By cdick - 11/03/2009 20:46 - United States

Today, my girlfriend and I decided to exchange presents for our birthdays. I spent $100 on perfume and Victoria's Secret clothes. She bought me a bag of lifesavers, then asked me to leave because she wanted to take a nap. FML

I agree, your life sucks 78 201

You deserved it 5 434

allmidnighteyes 10

Thursday 24 June 2010 9:05

Crash the party and get that shit baaaack, brosky. The rum, I mean, not the girl.

samanthadude 0

Thursday 24 June 2010 9:06

If she isn't interested there isn't much you can do. The faster you move on, the faster you'll find a girl who loves you just as much as you love her. :]

Comments

Heyyy31 0

Friday 25 June 2010 3:17

YDI. Just give up on her.

marcranger 28

Friday 25 June 2010 4:09

haha, op, you're a dumb *****. oh wait, even dumb ****** get tail!

iwadasn 32

Friday 25 June 2010 4:29

YDI for thinking you could buy her love. If she didn't love you before, $60 isn't going to change anything.

lucyvanpeltt 0

Friday 25 June 2010 5:11

She's trying to tell you something -- that she is not the girl of your dreams

Neep_fml 0

Friday 25 June 2010 5:22

Maybe next time you don't trying winning girls over by buying them things. $60 worth of rum =/= LOVE RETURNED. You sort of sound like a creep.

ivygirl 0

Friday 25 June 2010 5:40

damn her that's her loss

Shinygirlnz 1

Friday 25 June 2010 6:11

I'd put money on it that the OP was hoping that she'd get so wasted on the rum that she'd put out. Who buys a girl a bottle of BOOZE as a 'romantic' present for her and 'her friends'? Obviously he knows he's not included in her group of friends anyway because he doesn't even put himself in that category... so... he's just some creepy outsider trying to get laid by getting this girl drunk. If she knows you're into you - you would know if she liked you back by now. Giving her a bottle of inhibition-lowerer is just dodgy.