Miscellaneous: Slicy slicy

Slicy slicy

By nessacadesa - 24/03/2009 04:47 - United States

Today, I was telling my younger brother and sister how important it is to know how to use a knife properly, all while slicing potatoes. Just as I was saying how stupid people can be with knives, the potato slipped on the counter. I sliced open my hand while talking about knife safety. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 989

You deserved it 58 487

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 24/07/2019 05:00 - United States - El Paso

Today, I was cutting potatoes. I was cutting them slowly, being careful, but my mom told me to cut faster, that I wouldn't cut myself. I cut myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 503

You deserved it 389

By insightful - 20/03/2012 04:33 - Australia

Today, I was warning a girl in my art class to be careful with a Stanley knife, as she had managed to cut her finger quite badly. Just as I said it, I sliced my finger open with a Stanley knife. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 237

You deserved it 11 049

Kitchen Nightmares

By just the tip, though - 28/01/2014 17:06 - United States - Grovetown

Today, at work teaching a cooking class, one of the kids asked if they could use a knife to help me chop vegetables. I said no, because it was very sharp and only staff members are allowed to use them. Just as I said that, the knife sliced through the tip of my thumb. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 026

You deserved it 11 936

By 5p4571k - 25/05/2014 17:35 - Canada - Chilliwack

Today, I was cooking dinner for my children, managing for once not to screw up and hurt myself. Then, while chopping vegetables, I accidentally sliced my finger open. The same finger that was still covered in juice from a lemon I'd just squeezed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 970

You deserved it 7 582

Gammon

By Anonymous - 24/10/2022 06:00

Today, while demonstrating our new meat slicer at work, and after sharpening the blade at the end of the demonstration, I noticed some metal powder. I grabbed a rag to wipe it off, not realizing the blade was still in the “open” position. I now have six stitches and a really painful finger. FML

I agree, your life sucks 312

You deserved it 942

Put it away

By Anonymous - 27/10/2019 22:00

Today, I managed to cut myself twice with a Swiss army knife. Stabbed in one hand and sliced a finger on the other. Good to know it's super sharp. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 004

You deserved it 986

By Anonymous - 13/08/2019 02:00 - United Kingdom

Today, I was helping tidy up after my girlfriend's flat warming. I went to put a sharp kitchen knife in the sink while she was washing dishes, and stabbed her in the finger instead. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 136

You deserved it 990

911 please

By hurts - 04/05/2009 18:48 - Canada

Today, I was helping my friend wash dishes. As I went to grab some tongs to dry them, I impaled my forearm on a knife that was sticking blade up. My friend wanted to finish the dishes before taking me to the hospital. FML

I agree, your life sucks 66 674

You deserved it 4 994

By jmac - 11/03/2012 03:06 - United States

Today, I dropped a knife while cooking. Luckily it missed my foot, but only because it hit my knee. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 417

You deserved it 4 302

By Anonymous - 16/05/2019 22:00

Today, I learned how to sharpen a knife. I sharpened it so well that it went through my finger like a lightsaber. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 651

You deserved it 490

Jimboom 11

Tuesday 24 March 2009 12:14

Ha ha! Oh Irony thou art a cruel bitch! Though you could have saved it by saying "You see? I did that for your benefit to show you what happens when you don't pay attention while using a knife".

Good_old_Grim 8

Tuesday 24 March 2009 12:16

Yeah, what #2 said... or just drop to the ground screaming and trying to get blood on as much of anything as possible. See how careful the kids would be with knives after that.

Comments

eeee93757 0

Tuesday 24 March 2009 21:13

Gotta love irony but you didn't deserve it. Another important lesson was learned here: accidents happen.

mrcarmine 0

Tuesday 24 March 2009 22:09

actually, that probably makes it more memorable. lesson: don't talk while using knives.

Liliith_fml 0

Tuesday 24 March 2009 22:13

" and remember, kids, DON'T explain knife safety while using a knife, or this will happen to you..." :)

Maltastic 0

Tuesday 24 March 2009 22:44

Perfect Demonstration! Way to go... Hey, they learned at least, depending on their age and how bad you screamed they might be mortified Don't have to worry about them cutting themselves