Intimacy, Sex and Cops: Sticky fingers - FML

Sticky fingers

By FlickedOff 2023 - 01/12/2023 06:00

Spicy

Today, my FWB and I were on a road trip. His dumbass got us pulled over by the cops, and he decided it was the perfect moment to start fingering me. Worse yet, I got off in between visits from the cop. He took his license and ticket with his fingering hand. FML

I agree, your life sucks 147

You deserved it 532

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Same thing different taste

Hands on the wheel

By Username - 05/10/2011 00:02 - United States

Today, on my way home, my girlfriend started sexting me, telling me that she was waiting at my house. In my rush to get home to see her, I got pulled over and had to be patted down. He found no weapons, but he did find my stiffy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 967

You deserved it 12 664

By Sarah-D - 29/07/2016 05:31

Today, a policeman pulled me over and proceeded to flirt with me. After I had rejected him, he gave me a ticket for "not paying attention to the road". FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 273

You deserved it 2 265

Caught red-handed

By Anonymous - 30/11/2020 20:04

Spicy

Today, my girlfriend and I got busted by the cops having sex in a dark parking lot near the beach. As if that wasn't bad enough, as I was trying to talk my way out of a ticket, one of the cops peeks into the car window and I hear my girlfriend awkwardly giggle and say, "Hi daddy." FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 764

You deserved it 722

Straight to jail

By Miss bad decisions - 03/11/2023 22:00

Spicy

Today, my boyfriend and I got busted having public sex. In desperation, I promised the officer he could fuck me if he let us go. Now I've got an extra charge and probably an ex-boyfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 78

You deserved it 925

Hello hello hello

By Bonnie and Clyde - 08/05/2015 02:18 - United States - Humble

Spicy

Today, my boyfriend and I got busted by a cop for having sex in his car. When the cop sent us on our way, we went home and the garage was open, so we called the cops thinking someone was in the home. No one was in the house, and we got the same cop. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 092

You deserved it 9 349

By suzanneallen - 11/09/2009 04:23 - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I were fooling around in his car when things got hot and heavy and we decided to climb in the back. After we finished we started to put our clothes back just as a someone's brights flooded into the car. It was a cop, and he had been there the entire time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 127

You deserved it 40 964

Kinda sus

By kmf - 10/08/2009 19:06 - United States

Spicy

Today, my girlfriend and I were starting to get hot and heavy in my truck at our favorite park. We started going at it and we were both butt naked when I saw a car pull into the lot. Not only was it a cop car, but the first thing the cop asked my girlfriend was, "Are you being held against your will?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 145

You deserved it 14 379

Pure class

By DanceOnTheEdge - 20/07/2009 01:23 - United States

Spicy

Today, I was riding in the car with my boyfriend. While he was driving, I held out my hand as an offer for him to hold it. Instead, he grabs me by the wrist and shoves my hand down his pants. Lovely. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 697

You deserved it 19 387

By loveade11 - 12/01/2010 19:28 - France

Spicy

Today, a police officer caught my girlfriend and me having sex. The officer was my dad, and we were butt naked in his new Ford Expedition. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 718

You deserved it 35 589

By me - 19/05/2012 02:41 - United States - Wyandotte

Today, my husband and I were pulled over by a cop. He was still angry from our earlier argument over his constant freeloading, and when the cop told him we'd been doing 75 in a 55, he retorted, "Yeah? I did 75 in your mom last night, fuzzball." One more ticket I have to pay for. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 124

You deserved it 5 542

Next

Top comments

thefmlman2011 36

Friday 1 December 2023 8:01

I’d be lying if I didn’t say that that’s impressive to be able to do that

BurnInDemonFire 34

Monday 11 December 2023 1:06

I think the worst thing here is you let him do it.

Comments

thefmlman2011 36

Friday 1 December 2023 8:01

I’d be lying if I didn’t say that that’s impressive to be able to do that

BurnInDemonFire 34

Monday 11 December 2023 1:06

I think the worst thing here is you let him do it.

karan7991kumar 6

Thursday 4 April 2024 21:24

all I here is you were out, got off, and didn’t end up in prison

Keywords

TV shows Miscellaneous Work Awkward Coworkers Politics Transportation Ironic Embarrassing Relatable Social Media Instagram Parenting Shopping AITA Am I overreacting? Jealousy Love Kids Pranks Friends Dogs Housework Cars Porn Technology Sports Health Accident Mental health

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You deserved it 202

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You deserved it 267

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I agree, your life sucks 26 973

You deserved it 9 355

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I agree, your life sucks 638

You deserved it 141