Intimacy: Thanks, Dad!

Thanks, Dad!

By Sam - 28/11/2008 08:50 - France

Today, my dad surprised me by moving my bed (involving disassembling and reassembling it) in my new room, because I couldn't find how I wanted to set it up. He also took care of putting back my vibrator between the mattress and the base, where it was hidden. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 572

You deserved it 11 314

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Same thing different taste

By A.Summers - 30/09/2013 22:41 - United Kingdom - Glasgow

Today, my parents surprised me by redecorating my room. I think they were more surprised by the box of naughty toys under my bed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 052

You deserved it 11 497

By Ouch - 21/01/2012 00:29 - United States

Today, the vibrator I ordered online was delivered. I'd paid extra to make sure it would be here before the weekend, so I could sneak it into my room while everyone was gone. My dad decided to stay home all day and answer the door ahead of me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 834

You deserved it 9 356

By Anonymous - 21/01/2012 10:45 - Russian Federation

Today, I got home from my 6-week vacation. Apparently, my mum cleaned my room for me while I was gone because my vibrator was neatly tucked into my blanket, next to my pillow instead of being hidden under my bed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 458

You deserved it 9 321

By Mygawdwhy - 21/01/2018 01:30

Today, I gave my mom an extra pillow since the ones in the guest room were too flat and hurt her neck. Hours later, I remembered that I'd stashed my vibrator in that pillowcase during a romantic camping trip with my husband. She found it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 187

You deserved it 2 060

Code of silence

By nean83 - 12/01/2013 05:11 - United States - Inglewood

Today, my dad was helping me move my stuff out. I'd asked my boyfriend to deal with my sex toys and lingerie, but still my dad showed up later at my new place, handed me a box full of them all, and simply said, "I don't want to know." FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 500

You deserved it 39 901

The agony and the ecstasy

By Anonymous - 01/05/2023 12:00

Today, I got home from my vacation. The last few days of my trip, I stayed at my father's house. I was having trouble sleeping last night so I decided to use a little "discreet" vibrator that I travel with. When I unpacked back home, I realized I'd forgotten the vibrator in my bed at my father's house. I'm mortified. FML

I agree, your life sucks 501

You deserved it 1 011

By swtkiss1 - 18/02/2009 22:26 - United States

Today, my mom cleaned up my room. I had a drawer filled with condoms, 2 vibrators, and a bondage kit. She organized the condoms and vibrators in a shoe box. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 917

You deserved it 58 638

By Anonymous - 15/10/2011 01:48 - Canada

Today, I came home from school to find almost every single personal possession and piece of furniture from my bedroom all laid out or disassembled in the back yard. My dad smugly told me I'd better start moving it all back. This is his revenge for me salting his coffee this morning. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 176

You deserved it 41 138

By nooneatall - 15/01/2010 03:16 - France

Today, I was doing a shit load of sit-ups on my mattress. After realizing the bed was squeaking, I heard my dad laughing very hard from the basement. He thought I was masturbating. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 960

You deserved it 20 242

My package

By Nikki - 20/11/2019 05:00

Today, I finally received the vibrator I ordered online. Too bad they labeled what the item was on the outside of the box, and my dad was the one to pick up the packages. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 527

You deserved it 722

krovek42 0

Monday 6 April 2009 10:01

hahahaah oh god. i took my friend's out from her hiding spot under her bed, turned it on, and threw it at another friend of mine. She caught it, stared at it vibrating in her hands for a second, and then started screaming :D hahaha

mikeloyst 0

Tuesday 17 March 2009 19:42

Agree with #5, I have had the akward "Masturbation is healthy" conversation a few times before, It was wierd with my Doctor, but even worse with my mom, and even more akward how my dad always leaves the house a couple of hours before i go out to the bars, he says: "Get it all out now so you dont make my mistake when you dont want to wear a dome" (I am his mistake)

Comments

greenman_fml 0

Wednesday 4 February 2009 14:41

he probably used it before returning it. think about that the next time your lonely

ajeppsen 25

Sunday 15 April 2012 23:37

It's her dad

prophetsam 12

Tuesday 24 February 2009 7:47

I agree with#4 & #6 - at least you didn't get the typical parent "Masturbations healthy, even I do it too...." lecture you've probably read about on here.... LOL!