Animals: Thanks, Mr Whiskers

Thanks, Mr Whiskers

By Anonymous - 01/02/2012 06:13 - Canada

Today, while I was on the toilet, my cat managed to climb up behind me, slip and then grip itself to my bare ass. In my haste to get away from the cat, I pooped on the toilet without noticing. Until I sat back down. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 884

You deserved it 5 982

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Same thing different taste

Pissed

By CatDad - 18/12/2021 19:01 - United Kingdom

Today, I was taking a piss in my toilet, and my cat came and jumped up onto the toilet bin and looked at what I was doing. Instinctively, thinking she'd jump in or something, I grabbed her while I was midstream, causing me to piss on her, and on my hand. FML

I agree, your life sucks 355

You deserved it 845

By pooplife - 30/11/2014 19:32 - United Kingdom - Nottingham

Today, I sat down for a poop. The toilet seat slid off immediately, taking me with it. I lay on the bathroom floor for a moment, stunned, still pooping. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 260

You deserved it 4 968

By crazycat - 13/05/2011 16:23 - Canada

Today, in the early hours of the morning, my cat started scratching at my legs. I got out of bed and he raced me to the stairs, tripping me. I fell all the way down and landed in cat poop. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 622

You deserved it 5 848

By Anonymous - 04/05/2009 12:37 - Canada

Today, my cat was in the bathroom with me because he loves toilets. Everyone was sleeping so I went pee but didnt flush. My cat jumped onto the seat and fell in. I had to lift him out and then wash him. He hates water though, so I was scratched by my cat who was dripping with my own pee. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 008

You deserved it 28 867

Tiler, the creator

By musicalxtheories - 09/05/2020 08:00

Today, my cat pooped in the shower. How did I find out? I didn't see the poop when I got in. I slipped in it, and smacked my head on the tile wall. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 484

You deserved it 280

By MoncaBang - 29/01/2009 21:25 - United States

Today, my cat fell into the toilet, jumped out, and ran straight to hide in my bed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 685

You deserved it 3 453

Scaredy cat

By poop - 24/03/2016 18:15 - Canada - Toronto

Today, I discovered my cat is bathroom shy when I accidentally walked in on him relieving himself. He jumped about 3 feet in the air and bolted out, launching feces and pee all over the bathroom, hallway, and my shoes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 063

You deserved it 2 560

By Adam - 16/03/2010 20:51 - United States

Today, I woke up to go pee and my cat followed me into the bathroom as usual. Then, in a not so usual fashion, she tried to jump from the sink to the top of the toilet, missed, and fell into the bowl while I was peeing. I'm scratched in a bad place, I have urine to clean up off the bathroom floor, and a traumatized cat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 336

You deserved it 5 185

By Turdfoot - 12/02/2013 20:15 - United States - Prosper

Today, I discovered that my cat recently had explosive diarrhea, and couldn't make it to the litterbox in time. I discovered this when I stepped in the very, very fresh poop with my bare feet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 393

You deserved it 4 416

Fast and Furious

By TooQuick - 27/04/2016 12:19 - Mozambique - Maputo

Today, after a 2-hour meeting, I rushed to take an urgent dump. Unbeknownst to me, my urine was not hitting the porcelain bowl, but rather the underside of the lid. As it pooled around the pedestal, it soaked my pants, underwear, and when I stood up to button my pants, it got on my shirt too. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 029

You deserved it 2 796

Buttsexpirate 9

Wednesday 1 February 2012 12:03

I can just imagine OP sitting back down only to hear a *squish* and then that *Wa Wa* music play and OP puts their hand on their forehead and shakes their head

Pelreskovich 11

Wednesday 1 February 2012 12:14

That's shitty. Could be worse, could have pooped on the cat. That would have been wonderful to clean up.

Comments

balderson 1

Wednesday 1 February 2012 16:48

Thats what you get for having a cat!!!!

jasonll81 1

Wednesday 1 February 2012 16:56

Was your cat.... IN the toilet? How did it get to your bare ass while you were sitting on the can?

Greendaycheese 12

Wednesday 1 February 2012 17:59

How do you not notice?..

IsMyWenieHard 0

Wednesday 1 February 2012 18:11

Bahahahaha this shit happened to me to except I didn't shit on the seat I was playing temple run just finishing my shit lol

sandinthewaves 5

Wednesday 1 February 2012 20:11

That's what you get for having a cat! YDI

Philerup31 12

Wednesday 1 February 2012 20:16

That's why I don't let my cats in the bathroom

xxLovePinkxx 0

Wednesday 1 February 2012 20:56

Why was your cat in the bathroom with you while you were pooping?

bubo_fml 10

Wednesday 1 February 2012 21:30

Next time your cat square in the litter box, hover your cheeks over the Target area & heave a Havana on it's head! Teach that pussy who's boss by starting a Turd War!