Awkward, Cooking and Intimacy: The medium is the message

The medium is the message

By adam - 15/02/2010 02:16 - United States

Today, I made heart-shaped cookies for my girlfriend. My mom's reaction? "They look like dicks." FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 136

You deserved it 4 223

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Same thing different taste

By CryoSpectre - 11/05/2015 04:23 - United States - San Francisco

Today, I made my mom cookies for Mother's Day. My brother took all the cookies to work as a snack, because I didn't specifically tell him that the homemade "MOM" hearts weren't meant for him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 880

You deserved it 2 346

By FMAhole - 12/02/2019 12:18 - Australia - Brisbane

Today, while at the office, a surprise Valentine's gift arrived for me, the first I've ever received. It was a box of heart-shaped cookies. From my mother. I'm 39. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 737

You deserved it 4 140

By yummy(: - 31/10/2010 02:14 - United States

Today, my boyfriend, who is a great cook, decided to try his hand at baking. The cookies he made looked weird but tasted good. I jokingly said, "They taste great, but they look awful!" He responded by saying, "I could say the same thing about you." FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 919

You deserved it 27 410

By IwishIwashigh - 01/03/2017 14:00

Today, I went to make cookies, the box said mix by hand so I literally used my hands. Not a fork or anything. My step-mom walked in and laughed at me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 523

You deserved it 7 356

By lisahb - 19/06/2012 22:16 - United States - Detroit

Today, my mom took me to dinner. She told me about an argument that she and her boyfriend had, and she showed me the texts. While reading, I learned that she smells his dick before sucking it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 487

You deserved it 3 316

By wakinginvegas87 - 05/09/2010 15:49 - United States

Today, it was my boyfriend's parents' anniversary so I thought I'd do something to impress them. I made them chocolate-covered strawberries. But for some reason they gave me really dirty looks when they saw it. Turns out his mother is allergic to strawberries and his father is allergic to chocolate. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 762

You deserved it 5 318

By RawrSparkle - 21/09/2012 07:31 - United States - Davis

Today, I dropped a whole batch of penis-shaped cookies on the floor. Then I thought, "5-second rule" and started eating them. And then I realized that I was home alone, in pajamas, eating broken dick-cookies off the floor. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 127

You deserved it 14 370

By Anonymous - 09/05/2011 04:37 - United States

Today, I went to my boyfriend's house to give his mother a box of chocolates and flowers for Mother's Day. She just stared at them and said, "What's this for? You're not my daughter, and never will be. But I'll keep the chocolate." FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 895

You deserved it 6 316

By shinee - 15/08/2010 16:05 - Singapore

Today, to be nice, I baked cookies for my step-mom as a birthday present. I burnt my hand while putting them in the oven, but I'd hoped it would be worth it. When she got home, I gave one for her to try. She took a bite, spit it out, and threw it on the floor, asking if it was a joke or if I was really trying to poison her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 403

You deserved it 3 631

By Jumja - 15/01/2010 11:37 - Netherlands

Today, I found out my boyfriend's mother has invented a new kind of cake and named it after me: not because it's delicious, but because of the amount of fat in it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 212

You deserved it 5 713

Laurendorcus 0

Monday 15 February 2010 9:40

Okay, so you are not a professional cookie shaper, but its the thought that counts and thats really sweet of you. maybe it'll help remind your gf that although hearts are great, you're hoping she'll concentrate on your d*ck tonight. :-)

null_fml 11

Monday 15 February 2010 9:42

Tell your girlfriend "I made them shaped like something you'd recognize," with a noticeable wink, and see which shape she thinks it is!

Comments

gummybear33 0

Sunday 21 March 2010 6:44

That's so sweet!! (the cookies not what your mom said :P)

Julianneisasmurf 0

Monday 19 April 2010 0:29

Dude, I love your mom!

ERICA833 0

Wednesday 21 July 2010 4:00

I love your picture vlad

RawrBunneh 0

Saturday 24 July 2010 19:28

Well you can watch her eat dicks.

angtaffe 0

Friday 20 August 2010 4:12

then ur gf will like u even more

weirdo2013 0

Sunday 21 November 2010 2:19

win...

blinkingstarlet 15

Tuesday 22 February 2011 19:14

hahahahahahaha ur mom is awesome.

blinkingstarlet 15

Tuesday 22 February 2011 19:15

thats what she said! :0)

lakersfan4life 0

Sunday 19 June 2011 3:22

lmaooooo

rozz13 0

Saturday 16 July 2011 23:14

awwwwww that's so sweet!!!!

Keywords

Embarrassing Love Poopoo peepee Miscellaneous Christmas Romantic Break-ups Money Annoying Gross Ironic Argument Friends Awkward Haircut Cute Holidays Lonely Relatable Work Bosses Capitalism You're fired Cars Covid Health Jealousy Cheating Parenting Kids

The Top

Today, someone burgled my hotel room. As always, I had locked my passport, extra cash, and other valuables in the closet safe, so I thought the losses would be superficial. What a discovery that the safe hadn't been fastened to the closet shelf, so the thief just picked it up and took it home. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 111

You deserved it 3 102

Today, I found out that in the three years I've been dating my boyfriend, his parents have secretly been going through all of his emails, including the ones I've sent him with "sexy" pictures attached. I can't look his parents in the eye without being reminded that they've both seen me naked. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 300

You deserved it 14 749

The Top

Today, I was meeting friends for dinner at an Indian restaurant. I was waiting for the group to arrive and our table to be ready. An Indian man approached me smiling, so I said, "We're not ready for our table yet." Then I realized it was my friend's boyfriend, who I've met several times. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 092

You deserved it 68 101

Today, I went to my friend's beautiful wedding. The only other single girl there was 5 years old. She caught the bouquet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 327

You deserved it 5 099

Today, I have an incredibly high sex drive. My boyfriend doesn't. He made me throw away my, rarely used, sex toys because he's jealous of them. I wouldn't need them if we had sex more. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 110

You deserved it 379

Today, as I was walking towards my friends at the bus stop, a man came up to me and asked me out. This was the first time I'd be asked out in months. I accepted. When I reached my friends they looked at me then asked, "Why were you talking to that homeless guy?". FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 464

You deserved it 18 206

Today, I accidentally deep throated a fork. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 255

You deserved it 38 874

Today, I was pulled over for speeding. The officer was nice and let me off with just a warning. That is, until my dipshit brother yelled "Fucking pig!" out the window as the officer walked back to his car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 610

You deserved it 22 214

The medium is the message

Same thing different taste

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