Love, Accident and Health: Timber!

Timber!

By fucking SUCKS let's do it LIIIIIIIVEEEEEEEEE! - This FML is from back in 2015 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, my girlfriend jumped into my arms for a kiss. She's done it before, but this time I wasn't expecting it. I fell backwards, straight through my glass coffee table. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 370

You deserved it 2 132

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Top comments

Ninjahiga 27

Friday 11 December 2015 0:04

Oh my, I hope you are able to replace it. Don't be angry, she was just trying to be romantic... In a rough way

soulreaper12296 28

Friday 11 December 2015 0:06

Hopefully neither of you got hurt from the glass. And hopefully it wont be to expensive to replace.

Comments

Abiii82 18

Friday 11 December 2015 17:38

Ouch

PeaceTurtle 17

Saturday 12 December 2015 0:07

Hope you guys are okay. I've done the same thing. only broke off part of a desk though

jvanevery 19

Saturday 12 December 2015 8:13

I'm sorry but I am old but I'm an old fart that is just jealous of you enjoy this enthusiasm

Keywords

Animals Cats Embarrassing Christmas Health Work Awkward Love Anniversary Boredom Ironic Intimacy Abuse Drunk AITA Transportation Am I overreacting? Alcohol Gun control Kids Parents Language Mysterious Noise Relatable Money Miscellaneous Food Delivery Family

The Top

Today, my girlfriend threatened to leave me unless we get married within a year and have a baby. I don’t negotiate with terrorists but now I’m gonna be single and alone over Christmas, unless I wheedle myself into my brother's Christmas, but I think I’d just ruin it for his family. FML

I agree, your life sucks 498

You deserved it 174

Today, I decided to have sex with with my boyfriend. After we had finished, I jokingly said, "Who's going to sleep in the wet patch?" He got up and said, "You're optimistic, I'm not staying. Oh, and I'm dumping you, that performance was disappointing." It was my first time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 573

You deserved it 4 529

The Top

Today, my ex-boyfriend asked how long he'd have to wait until he could ask out my best friend. We broke up yesterday. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 565

You deserved it 3 235

Today, my 6 year-old daughter asked, "What would happen to me if you and daddy died?" I told her that she'd probably live with her Uncle Ant and Aunt Ilene. She looked at me and said, "You guys can die. I won't cry. I get everything I want over there." FML

I agree, your life sucks 102 481

You deserved it 10 022

Today, my dog barked at his own reflection in the mirror for five full minutes. When I tried to calm him down, he started barking at me like I was in on the conspiracy that seemed to be going on in his head. FML

I agree, your life sucks 335

You deserved it 102

Today, arriving home with my boyfriend after a night away, we opened our bedroom door to find his younger brother and a girl naked in our bed. She looked at me, looked at him and said, "Ew. Who's that?" She then asked for a pair of socks, because she had, "rank feet". FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 399

You deserved it 432

Today, I learned that no matter how much of a nerd a girl claims to be, she is not ready for you to speak Klingon during sex. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 790

You deserved it 71 855

Today, my dad learned that it's possible to power a lightbulb with a potato. Since then, he's been going around the house removing all the plugs from the wall and plugging them into potatoes instead. He's absolutely baffled as to why it won't work. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 583

You deserved it 2 738