Intimacy: Today, a fight broke out in a bar between several people, over... - FML

By Username - 05/08/2011 14:05 - United States

Spicy

Today, a fight broke out in a bar between several people, over some talk about one of their moms being somewhat inclined towards intercourse with her pets. I managed to slip out quietly with just a scratch from flying chair debris, despite having started the rumor. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 234

You deserved it 69 691

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Same thing different taste

Demon drink

By Aliiveopen - 24/08/2020 07:02 - United States - Wasilla

Today, my mom got blackout drunk and tried to fight me, my stepdad, and my brother, resulting in my stepdad leaving, my brother getting 2 holes from a metal shelf my mom tried to joust him with, and I got bit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 571

You deserved it 112

By hot_mess88 - 04/07/2009 15:24 - United States

Today, I got called to a biker bar to break up a fight between my parents. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 120

You deserved it 2 591

By *facefloor* - 24/07/2012 20:08 - United States

Today, my girlfriend and I got into a heated argument at a house party. To avoid a huge scene, I pulled her into another room, during which I managed to trip over my feet and faceplant the floor. She shouted, "Hah! That's what you get!" Now everyone thinks she beat the shit out of me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 067

You deserved it 5 414

By deven - 29/08/2009 22:58 - United States

Today, I saw a fight so I went over to try and break it up. Someone thought I wanted to join in, so he gave me an unexpected whap in the happy sacks, and I also got a bloody nose for my troubles. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 736

You deserved it 44 794

Damn, son

By Anonymous - 31/10/2012 20:24 - United States - Lufkin

Spicy

Today, I was at a barbeque with my family, my boyfriend, and some mutual acquaintances. Someone jokingly called my boyfriend a pussy, to which he loudly replied, "I guess I am what I eat!" My mother was sitting across from us. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 318

You deserved it 4 182

You're grounded!

By Break A Leg - 08/08/2022 14:00

Today, I accidentally slammed my leg against the coffee table. It was only after I went to the bathroom a few minutes later that I realized there's now a massive gash on my upper leg. I also got in trouble for yelling, "SON OF A BITCH!" as soon as the impact occurred. FML

I agree, your life sucks 760

You deserved it 137

By xxx - 03/09/2017 04:29

Today, at a meeting, I had a heated argument with the only female employee at the office. A little later, I managed to hit her in the face with a door, giving her a bruise. Nobody believes it was an accident. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 669

You deserved it 529

Fun for all the family

By Anonymous - 14/04/2021 02:00

Today, my mom and dad got into a fight, during which my dad said to my mom that her health conditions were of her own doing. Because of that, I got pissed and had a fight with my dad, taking my mom's side. Turns out, my mom took his side and ratted me out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 767

You deserved it 282

By Vince - 09/12/2011 19:38 - Canada

Today, I was cuddling up on the couch with my girlfriend, when my drunken mother walked in the room, slurred out, "Room for one more?" and leaped on top of us. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 063

You deserved it 3 238

By myparentsarehoes - 03/08/2009 16:33 - Canada

Spicy

Today, I was at a bar with my friends for my 19th birthday when I saw my dad grinding some chick that was not my mom. I confronted him and told him I was telling mom. He then pointed across the bar to my mom with another man. I just found out my parents are swingers. FML

I agree, your life sucks 76 320

You deserved it 5 765

Next

Top comments

Epsilonyx 15

Friday 5 August 2011 18:50

...well done, my friend. Well done.

Weetart 8

Friday 5 August 2011 18:50

ohhh you deserved to be there in the brawl.

Comments

Rainbow_dumpster 28

Friday 5 August 2011 18:53

Comment moderated for rule-breaking.

jayalexander 7

Friday 5 August 2011 18:53

how did that conversation start?

mikentrigger 4

Friday 5 August 2011 18:55

I see why this is a FML. Op got a scratch, yeah, definitely FYL.

laxgirl17 5

Friday 5 August 2011 18:55

It shouldn't say FML at the end, it should say **** YES.

aliadnan708 6

Friday 5 August 2011 18:55

Ydi big time hope they'll know its u who started it

mandiecait 0

Friday 5 August 2011 18:56

..so why is your life ******?

mgon93 0

Friday 5 August 2011 18:57

Your stupid!! Why'd u do tht?

coffeeandcream 8

Friday 5 August 2011 18:57

Comment moderated for rule-breaking.

jgh122293_fml 2

Friday 5 August 2011 18:58

how is your life ******? you started a rumor and did not get hurt your the opposite of ******

xrainbowshadowx 17

Friday 5 August 2011 18:58

You sir, are a dick.

Keywords

Confused University Annoying Education Love AITA Sex Divorce Awkward Dreams Relatable Miscellaneous Embarrassing Racism Work Weird Motherhood Cute Pregnancy Kids Animals Harassment Family Poopoo peepee Surprise Health Roommate Food My ex Texting

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The Top

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I agree, your life sucks 719

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I agree, your life sucks 65 543

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I agree, your life sucks 5 304

You deserved it 471

Today, after saving up for weeks, I bought myself an iPad. Because mine is better than the one my parents bought my ten-year-old brother, he got pissed and threw it into our pool. I'm now grounded for getting angry and calling him a bastard in the aftermath. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 248

You deserved it 2 735