Work: Today, a stuffed ferret was the latest addition to the list of...

By Anonymous - 05/03/2012 16:36 - United Kingdom

Today, a stuffed ferret was the latest addition to the list of weird items my colleagues have found in our rubbish tip, and that they put in my office. The list also includes explicit fetish porn playing cards, live ammo and dead pheasants, to name a few. I need a new job. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 148

You deserved it 2 601

Winter: Snow and Funny News
Snuggle up and laugh with our winter stories, where snow isn't the only thing sliding around! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

By parkertownparadise - 16/02/2012 07:43 - United States

Today, after applying for a job at the local pet store, I picked up a ferret. It began licking my cheek, causing me to turn my head. It then latched onto my ear and hung like a giant furry hoop earring. I screamed, then quietly left the building. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 185

You deserved it 4 782

Smells like victory

By B-rent - 18/03/2011 16:10 - United States

Today, I discovered that the lovely, hunger-inducing smell that's been lingering around the office lately is from the local animal crematory. I've been wistfully inhaling the stench of burning cats, dogs, and other various animals. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 052

You deserved it 7 081

By shaviTuT - 07/02/2013 19:44 - Malaysia - Bandar Penggaram

Today, after three weeks of holding out, my stingy boss finally called animal control about the birds in the air vent above the register. While I was working, they rummaged through the vents, causing live maggots to fall down right in front of me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 450

You deserved it 2 672

Take, is gift

By leaaaa 223 - 14/07/2020 23:01

Today, I woke up to yet another severed rat head next to my bed, which I have to dispose of yet again. Cats are seriously weird. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 308

You deserved it 319

By Anonymous - 16/01/2010 09:10 - Australia

Today, I was on a job trial at the local pet shop and, naturally, was doing all the disgusting jobs. As I was cleaning the kittens' litter in the cat enclosure, someone thought it would be funny to lock me in there. I sat in a giant cage in the middle of the store with people laughing at me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 473

You deserved it 3 103

By MushyKetchup - 14/08/2015 07:01 - United States - Amarillo

Today, a tarantula joined my stuffed animal collection in its drawer. It, unfortunately, wasn't stuffed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 210

You deserved it 1 993

By broomrape - 29/04/2009 04:52 - United States

Today, I found out that the horrible stench haunting my apartment for the past week was the decomposing corpse of my freedom loving gerbil underneath the bed that I've been sleeping on. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 157

You deserved it 11 678

By tannarox - 28/01/2012 15:46 - United States

Today, our rodent problem was taken care of. I discovered this when my cat projectile-vomited a soggy, death-scented wad of dark fur and tiny organs onto the couch. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 791

You deserved it 2 561

By Thanks Fred - 18/05/2019 00:05

Today, I discovered why there was such a horrible stench in my bedroom. My cat had a secret stash of shit under my dresser. Along with the carcass of a rat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 856

You deserved it 306

By Ellencrazee - 13/08/2011 10:22 - United Kingdom

Today, I came home from holiday, only to find my house full of small decomposing animals, courtesy of my cat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 744

You deserved it 5 265

waswashere 0

Monday 5 March 2012 18:50

Damn I knew I misplaced my ferret

Blacksxe 1

Monday 5 March 2012 18:59

Well if you don't want those cards... I umm have a friend who would love them...

Comments

mattorama 15

Monday 5 March 2012 20:47

Live ammo? I could use some .45 or .223, if you have it.

bmg0014 3

Monday 5 March 2012 20:51

Hey you can't go wrong with some free ammo just saying

j_cat187 19

Monday 5 March 2012 21:02

I'm guessing you found some 12 gauge skeet shot.

enopola 5

Monday 5 March 2012 21:03

Real cool

squarecircles 13

Monday 5 March 2012 21:18

What kind of job is that? eBay?

geod69 8

Monday 5 March 2012 21:52

Sounds like fun

_Oblivion_ 12

Monday 5 March 2012 22:00

Yeah uh no. I don't live in the uk but you don't have to be too smart to know that anything illegal to possess is illegal to use also. Certain ammunition is illegal because it's illegal to fire them. I'm not sure if it's because of velocities or weights or what; but in the us (new jersey) you can be penalized for carrying hollow points other than to and from a range. ( http://www.njsp.org/about/fire_hollow.html for all you gun nazi people) The shells aren't illegal (as I know of) because they are completely harmless. And besides there is another way of unloading bullets in a legal way. It's called a bullet puller, look it up.