Kids: Today, I came home from work. I was really tired and told my...

By Lauren Smith - 17/10/2010 16:52 - United States

Today, I came home from work. I was really tired and told my son that I would make him dinner later. He called the cops saying, "Mommy won't feed me." FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 348

You deserved it 6 183

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Same thing different taste

By Chubby - 02/11/2009 20:39 - Belgium

Today, I was babysitting a really annoying kid who wouldn't listen to me, and threw his food through the kitchen, so I punished him. When his mother came home he ran to her and said, "Mommy, mommy, it's not true what you told me, fat people are NOT nice!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 565

You deserved it 5 542

Smash the patriarchy!

By Anonymous - 25/06/2023 02:00 - United Kingdom

Today, I got home to my son with a bruised face and my daughter locked in her room. Apparently, when she got home from work, her unemployed brother asked her when she was going to cook dinner, so she punched him in the head. He’s so entitled that he actually thought he’d get sympathy from me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 851

You deserved it 370

By whattabrat - 26/02/2012 05:16 - Canada

Today, I was babysitting. Everything was going well until the kid called 911 on me for making him eat his vegetables. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 079

You deserved it 3 297

Reported!

By thatcreepyteacher - 17/02/2016 04:27 - United States - Mchenry

Today, someone called the police on me because one of my students was going home with me every day. The student is my son. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 844

You deserved it 1 437

By me. - 12/11/2012 04:30 - United States - Fort Wayne

Today, my father told me to take the car and get some groceries. An hour and a half later, coming home with the groceries, I see the cops all around my house because my dad had called them, thinking that I had run away and stolen the car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 126

You deserved it 1 727

Just a dream

By Anonymous - 06/02/2020 01:00 - Canada - Toronto

Today, at midnight, I heard my son calling for his mom. I stopped by his room and asked him what was wrong? He didn't tell me. Instead, he said: "Oh, I don't need you." FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 881

You deserved it 216

By oh well - 14/03/2019 06:00 - United States - Hesperia

Today, my sister in law threatened to call CPS on me because I “starved” her children when they spent the night. I didn’t starve them. I made an actual home cooked meal instead of the microwaveable or fast food crap she constantly feeds them. They chose not to eat and threw tantrums instead. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 856

You deserved it 206

By Anonymous - 16/06/2017 06:00 - United States - North Olmsted

Today, my mom tried to ground me. In the apartment that I own. Because I didn't eat enough of the dinner that I'd made. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 811

You deserved it 389

Priorities

By Anonymous - 06/03/2024 02:00 - United States

Today, I was sent by my mother and her boyfriend to pick up some take-out. After getting the food, I began to turn out once the traffic light was green. An asshole cop sped past the red light and slammed into my car, totaling it. When I called my house, my mom's boyfriend asked, "Where's our dinner?" I'm fine, by the way. FML

I agree, your life sucks 525

You deserved it 78

By Anonymous - 29/07/2012 20:34 - United States - Johnston

Today, after a busy afternoon taking care of the kids, I was feeling really down about only being a mom these days, and I was hoping my husband would make me feel better when he got off work. In the middle of cuddling, he called me "mom." FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 818

You deserved it 4 014

DocBastard 38

Sunday 17 October 2010 23:11

Spanking. That is all.

FirstBornUnicorn 0

Sunday 17 October 2010 23:06

Good. Now your son has you on a leash.

Comments

rnbz 0

Monday 18 October 2010 0:12

you should beat the shit out if him then say call the cops that mommy beat the **** outa you.

MyFirstKiss 0

Monday 18 October 2010 1:04

um,as funny as that sounds but lets not and say we did on that one

mg211 0

Monday 18 October 2010 0:17

Ha some one needs to be taught a lesson

MyFirstKiss 0

Monday 18 October 2010 1:02

well never do that again.who knows what the helll he will do nxt time

XhugzX 0

Monday 18 October 2010 1:15

if hes smart enough to call the cops how come he didnt just get himself a snack?

aliaysleighbasic 0

Monday 18 October 2010 7:49

yes. finally. there is always cereal or something. geesh.

hghiPigh 0

Monday 18 October 2010 2:25

ydi! feed your offspring

elmorous 0

Monday 18 October 2010 2:34

Somebody gonna get a hurt real bad!

aback 4

Monday 18 October 2010 2:34

Brussels sprouts and liver for supper!

aliaysleighbasic 0

Monday 18 October 2010 20:57

ahahahaha. totally my thoughts. and for the rest of the week too.

ThePhantomGamer 20

Monday 18 October 2010 2:35

One reason I'm glad I got a vasectomy.

jocelyng_fml 0

Monday 18 October 2010 2:53

I once called the cops when I was five cus I was mimicking my sister... she was only joking about calling them and I wasn't

TheZarola 10

Monday 18 October 2010 3:16

Your kid's got good traits. Already he's telling women to get in the kitchen and make him a sammich. YDI. Get off your lazy ass; it's your job to feed your kid.

Moemoemoe_fml 0

Tuesday 19 October 2010 7:31

One can only hope you hate the idea of one day managing to lose your virginity. Because if you think you'll ever get laid being such a little douche, you're seriously deluding yourself. :)